Risk It All
by DanaGabrielleEspinosa
Summary: Bella Swan had a great life - a wealthy family, and beauty. However, when James kidnaps her, she is forced to rely on Edward for survival. Something unexplainable forms between them. What are the consequences of this? Old title: Love Ignites
1. Lost and Insecure

**READ.**

**In case you skip the AN later on in the story, to new readers: Sorry if it ever says "Noah" "Frank" or "Milly" or any other name where you're like, "wtf is this?" The reason I might miss it is because this used to be a story with different characters (my own story, not a fanfic) and for every chapter I change the name, and sometimes I miss it. Noah is Edward Frank is James and Milly is Bella. So try and ignore it. I try not to miss it. Anyways, enjoy :)**

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Chapter 1

Bella POV

I had never realized I could miss home so much until that night - the very first night that would be the beginning of my forever.

Teenagers like myself would always say they hated their family, and that their parents didn't understand them. Yeah, well I thought that, too. Now, I continued wishing for my mom to just run through the dirty basement door, smiling hugely, telling me it was all a lie.

I knew that wouldn't happen.

It all started out like my normal school morning. I would get dressed, go to school and then walk home. However, I didn't get to my house.

"You lost?" a man asked me as he drove at my pace next to me as I walked down the deserted road to my house. My mom always told me never to go down this road, but I never listened.

_Stupid._

I knew this was weird, but I still talked to him.

"No, I'm not," I said, looking at my feet as I continued walking through the cold October air.

"Are you sure?" he murmured.

I sped my paces up. My heart was thrumming like a humming birds wings - I was afraid.

"Yes." Why was I answering?

"Okay then," he sighed. He rolled his window up and drove away, down a road leading to the woods.

I wasn't stupid. I knew where that road led. It led a perfect circle to cut me off where I was walking. Stupidly I thought that maybe he wouldn't wait for me at the end.

Stupidly was an understatement.

I pulled on my sweater as the fall air Forks offered nipped at my arms. My breath was in little clouds in front of me, and for some reason I wasn't even thinking about the whole "weird man incident". I was more concerned about Angela, my best friend. Her mom found out she was…doing things - bad things for a fourteen year old - with Ben, her boyfriend. She was grounded, and that meant I was pretty much grounded, too since I had no other friends to hang out with.

_Stupid! _I screamed at myself now.

Why wasn't I thinking about the man? Why didn't I turn and go a different way?

I stopped stiffly once I emerged from the trees to be met with the man from the van. His hair was greasy, and the little amount of sunlight left shined on his brown hair that was in a ponytail. His eyes were grey, and they were hollow. He looked at me like a lion would look at its prey.

He was the lion, I was the prey.

"Now you look lost," he said. He stepped towards me, and I was like a deer caught in headlights. I just stood there like an idiot. "You're going to come with me now."

I screamed, which had to be a very bad move.

He punched me, and then everything became a little fuzzy.

"Shut up!" he ordered in a deranged voice.

He slung me over his shoulder, then threw me in the back of his van. He put a dirty rag over my mouth, and as he drove somewhere far from my home, my muffled pleas grew quieter and quieter for someone to hear.

No one would hear me; no one would ever know.

Edward POV

October. October 11th. Huh, seemed like a normal enough day.

Ha, well screw that logic.

Today was not "normal". James left the house. I asked where he was going, and he didn't tell me. He said, "Shut up, kid," then left.

Thanks "_dad_".

Oh, well. I needed to catch up on my books anyway. So, while James was gone, I read the books hidden under the floorboards in my room that was the size of a dog's kennel.

Our house was small - that was an understatement. Our house was a piece of shit in the middle of a trailer park. All the trailers surrounding our house made it look like a god damn palace.

I snorted as I read.

There was a slam outside - a car door. My heart beat nervously as I frantically ran through my room, hiding the books that were for some reason not allowed in our house.

Once the books were hidden, I looked out the window, pushing my shaggy bronze hair out of my eyes to get a better view. I squinted my eyes, trying to see through the darkness outside as I heard muffled female screeches.

What the hell…

"I already told you to shut up!" James' voice yelled.

Whoever was crying and screaming, stopped, but I could still hear gasps for breath as she continued crying.

I ran from my room to the outside of our house. Stopping abruptly in front of me was James and…a girl that looked a little younger than me.

"What the hell is going?!" I screamed, staring at the girl.

Wow. She was…pretty. Her hair was long and wavy, down to her waist. It was brown, and her eyes shined brightly in the darkness, despite there color. They were a deep brown, like a clear ocean in one of those tropical places I had never, and probably would never get to see in real life.

"Shut up, Edward," James ordered, shoving past me with the girl in tow.

I followed him inside. "James, what are you doing? Who is this girl? Where did she-"

His hand smacked across my face and I flew across the room, landing into a ton of empty beer cans.

Gross.

"Go to your fucking room!" he yelled.

I stood up shakily, looking at the girl in his arms. She was shaking, and her eyes were bloodshot.

"Tell me what's going on first," I demanded, keeping my eyes on the girl.

"None of your business," he spat.

I turned my gaze to him. "If you're taking random girls into the house, I deserve to know why," I hissed.

He was silent, glaring back at me with the same amount of intensity.

"Fine," he grumbled. "We're keeping her. She's ours."

My eyes nearly bugged out of my head.

"What do you mean 'keeping her'?" I eyed him suspiciously.

The girl started to burst out crying, but the dirty cloth in her mouth quieted it down. I had the urge to go over and hug her or something to make her calm down, but James would probably beat the shit out of me if I did.

"I mean, I took her," he said, unperturbed.

"You _kidnapped _her?!" I screamed, my yell overlapping her cries.

He pursed his lips. "I wouldn't really call it kidnapping…"

I rolled my eyes. "What would you call it then?" I spat.

I felt someone staring at me, and I looked at the girl. She was staring at me.

"I would call it claiming. I wanted her, so I took her."

I stared at him for a minute, making sure he wasn't kidding. When I confirmed he wasn't, I felt more than disturbed.

"James, she's not a doll you can just take when you feel like it. She's a fucking person."

He shrugged. "I don't care."

I just stared at him.

"And if you tell the cops, you're dead," he growled, glaring daggers into my eyes. He shoved the girl into my arms, and I caught her reflexively. "Put her in the basement while I take a shower." He walked away, and into the bathroom.

I just stood there, staring down at the girl in my arms. It felt weird with her in my arms. She was so small it seemed. She was fragile. I looked down at her to find her still staring at me.

"Uh…" I muttered awkwardly.

Her eyes were big as they stared at me curiously.

"All right then," I muttered. I held her more tightly, turning to the basement door to bring her down.

She was silent as I carried her in my arms down the wooden steps to the basement.

I didn't know what to do. This was wrong. This was fucking illegal!

I searched for the string to the light and pulled on it. A very small amount of light illuminated through the dirty space. I didn't want to leave her down here in the dark, dirty basement. There were fucking rats down here!

"Put me down," she mumbled into the towel in her mouth.

"Oh, sorry," I apologized like an idiot. I set her down on the cleanest spot I could find on the floor and pulled the rag from her mouth. "Please don't yell," I begged. "I do like living."

She didn't scream once the rag was removed from her mouth. She stared down at her little hands, twirling her fingers as tears slid down her cheeks.

I stared at her, pained.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

She sniffled rubbing the tears from her cheeks.

"If I could, I'd get you out of here."

She didn't respond, so I stood up from my crouch in front of her and went upstairs.

I glared at the bathroom door James was in as I walked past it and into my room.

Tonight, I'd go see the girl sitting scared and alone in our dirty ass basement.

Bella POV

I sat in the basement for hours. I could hear a TV being shut off, and loud, clumsy foot steps going to a different room. The house was silent. I never felt more alone.

I watched as the light bulb hanging from the ceiling swung methodically back and forth.

Edward.

He made me feel safe. The boy who actually cared about my feelings. I wondered if he really meant what he said - if he'd really get me out of here if it wouldn't cost his life.

He was a scruffy looking boy.

I smiled at the use of the word "scruffy".

His hair was all tangled and hanging over his eyes. It was a strange, copper-like color with bright green eyes hiding behind it.

I could hear an owl outside, and the sound calmed me. My tears lessened, just like they did when Edward came running in front of my kidnapper - James. I didn't know why, but he made me feel safe.

I stretched on the dirty floor, getting as comfy as was possible on this disgusting floor. I crawled up in a ball like a scared kitten. I felt so vulnerable, so hollow here.

There was a little window above me that I stared at, and I briefly considered escaping through there. However, I figured that would be no use. Where would I go, anyway?

So instead I just shut my eyes, hoping that maybe when I woke up, this would all be over.

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"Shit!"

My eyes shot open quickly. They darted through the dark room. The light from the little light bulb hanging from the ceiling was still on, but it wasn't enough to see where the voice had come from.

"Don't be scared," Edward's voice whispered as boxes crackled. "It's not James."

I sighed in relief. How could someone I barely knew who was probably the son of my kidnapper relieve me? Oh well, it did. I didn't care.

He stepped into the light, and shook his head, making dust fall.

"I fell," he stated simply.

The corner of my lip twitched, almost smiling.

_Almost._

"Yeah," he sighed, sitting down Indian style in front of me, "walking down these shitty stairs in the dark does that to a person."

I sat up, copying the way he sat.

"Hello," I whispered.

He nodded. "Hi."

I was sort of confused why he was down here, so I asked, "Why are you down here?"

He gazed at something behind my head, but I kept my eyes on his.

"Honestly? I have no fucking clue." He shrugged, smirking at me. "I guess I felt bad for you."

I glared at him.

"What?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.

"I don't need pity," I said through clenched teeth.

He laughed. "Uh, yeah you do. You got…" His smile fell, and he looked at me apologetically. "Kidnapped," he finished in a whisper. "You do need sympathy."

I didn't answer.

"What's your name?" he asked after a long while.

"Bella Swan," I whispered.

He nodded, and I saw him mouth my name to himself.

"And you?" I asked quietly.

"Edward Cullen."

Cullen.

"I really am sorry for this," he said again. "I didn't know that he'd do this. I didn't even know he thought about doing this kind of thing."

I grimaced. Of course me.

"Am I going to die?" I whispered almost inaudibly.

He stayed silent for what felt like years, but then he finally answered.

"I don't know."

That was the last straw. I began crying again, covering my face in my knees. I pulled my knees to my chest, wrapped my arms around my calves, and tried muffling my cries.

"I'll try my best, though," he whispered to me.

I looked up at him. "To what?"

"To try and keep him from…hurting you." He laughed humorously. "Trust me, it's a very difficult job. I get my ass beaten frequently." He looked down, and his brow was furrowed as he looked down at his wrists.

I followed his gaze to his wrists and gasped when I saw large, pinkish silver scars. There was also bloody, scabbed lines - new ones.

He didn't look at me.

"Did he do that to you?" I asked.

He nodded.

I felt like crying again. It was irrational. Why should I care? But, I did.

"I can't let him ruin your perfect skin," he said, smiling down at his wrists.

I smiled timidly. I could feel color rising to my cheeks, and I felt like a complete moron.

He chuckled.

I looked up to see him staring at me, and my face got even hotter - if that was possible.

"You blush?" he asked, smiling.

I looked back up at him, biting the inside of my cheek. "Yeah," I sighed, "I do."

He stared at me. "Don't be embarrassed about it," he said. "It's…pretty."

My cheeks may have melted.

"You go to sleep," he whispered. "I'll stay until you fall asleep - I mean, if you want me to…?" He looked at me, waiting for an answer.

"Okay," I agreed. I yawned, then got back into my ball-like position on the floor. The hollowness I had felt before seemed to disappear as I listened to Edward's steady breathing.

Edward POV

I waited. I sat there like…I don't know what I was sitting here like. I had an odd sensation to protect Bella.

Bella Swan - the girl who James had kidnapped.

I frowned as I watched her sleeping form.

She was so beautiful, no wonder he had picked her. I hadn't seen anyone who ever looked like her. I had only read about it in the girly, romance novels I for some reason liked reading.

She shuffled on the dirty floor, and her hand fell on my knee.

I stared at it. It was so small. It was ivory, and reminded me of a porcelain dolls.

I gently picked it up off my knee and set it next to her. She yawned again in her sleep as I got up off the floor.

I didn't want to leave her, but if James caught me down here with her, I'd be dead.

I pulled on the string to the one light down here, then headed upstairs, and tried to get a goodnights sleep. I needed it. I hadn't had one in weeks.


	2. Run Away

**I'm glad you all like it so far! Don't worry, I already finished this story, so I'll be putting up a chapter a day, so keep the reviews coming. **

**Enjoy :D**

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Chapter 2

Bella POV

"Wake up!" someone who wasn't Edward screamed in my ear drunkenly.

My eyes fluttered open, and James was standing in front of me. My eyes widened and a small whimper escaped from my mouth; it was involuntary, but James was angered by it.

His foot smashed into my stomach, and the air swooshed out of my lungs. I grasped my chest, crying in pain.

"Yeah, that's right," he grumbled. "You talk, you get hit. That's how it works."

I looked up at him as he walked up the stairs.

"I'll be back. Edward's going to keep an eye on you." He turned on the stairs and looked at me. "Don't get any ideas," he sneered. He turned back to the stairs, then left, slamming the door.

My lip quivered as I curled up in a ball, leaning against the cold wall. My stomach growled wildly, and I remembered the last thing I ate was the disgusting peanut butter and jelly sandwich at school. It was the size of my palm, and I didn't even finish the whole thing.

I was starving.

I felt my mouth. It was so dry that I couldn't believe my tongue wasn't cracking.

I looked back up at the window a few feet above my head. It had sunlight streaming through onto the center of the floor of the basement. It looked like a nice day out, with a blue sky and a bright sun shining. I loved these kinds of days - they were rare.

I realized now that I was a prisoner, and I had two fates. I'd either die here, or die out of here if I escaped. They were both horrible. It seemed more dignifying to die trying to escape, but I still stayed. Why?

Edward.

I couldn't leave him here all alone. He was a friend…sort of. Not really. Whatever he was, I still couldn't leave him here, all alone, with _James. _He had to endure this kind of treatment everyday, and he couldn't leave. What kind of God would give someone like Edward a father like James?

I was starting to hate God for doing this to me, and to him.

However, God did have a plan people said. Maybe he had a purpose for bringing me here, and bringing Edward here. I hoped the plan was worth my life, because if not, I'd be seriously pissed.

Edward POV

I stared at the ceiling of my room, my eyes still wide as they had been since I left Bella.

No sleep. Yeah, like that's fucking new.

I looked out my window and stared at the sun as its light bounced off the trees. It was beautiful. The day seemed like it was sheathed in gold outside, but in here was where all the darkness stayed.

My house was a fucking death house.

"Hey, kid," James said, stumbling into my room.

I rolled my eyes and turned my head on the pillow to look at him.

"What?" I grumbled sleepily.

"I'm going to work. Turns out, I didn't get fired after all!" he said happily.

"That's great," I muttered sarcastically.

"So, you have to watch the girl."

My dreary day seemed to brighten.

I tried hiding the excitement in my eyes, and tried to be all indifferent about it.

"Sure, whatever," was my lame reply.

James nodded. "Good." He shut the door, and I watched out the window as he drove away in his crappy excuse for a car.

I jumped out of bed once he was gone and brushed my teeth and unruly hair. I pulled a raggedy t-shirt on and my holey jeans. I picked up a pair of sneakers, then put them on without tying the laces. Once I was dressed, I went from my room to the living room, then down the stairs of the basement to where Bella would be sitting.

I stopped on the stairs with my foot in the air about to go on the next step once I caught sight of her.

She looked horrible.

Her hair was all knotted, her skin was flushed, and she had her hand clutched to her stomach as she panted from something I knew all too well.

James fucking hit her in the gut.

I had a brief image of me kicking his ass for even _touching _her, but then I realized there was nothing I could do. I wasn't the boss, I was just a helpless kid.

"Edward?" she called.

My heart started beating erratically. I was happy…? _Why?_

"I'm here," I said as I walked down the stairs. I jumped down the last two steps and walked over to her and sat down in front of her.

She smiled weakly.

Her eyes were fucking bloodshot, and her lips that were all rosy and perfect yesterday were now pale. Her skin seemed to even pale a little - if that was even possible considering she was already so fucking white.

"Shit," I cursed. "You look horrible."

She rolled her eyes. "Thanks," she said sourly.

I rolled my eyes, too. "I didn't mean you look _ugly. _I meant, you look sick." My brow furrowed.

She shrugged.

It was silent for awhile, but the silence was comfortable.

I didn't like her sitting down here all day, just fucking moping. I decided to take her out. James would be gone until about six tonight, so I could take her out. She needed to do _something._

"Do you want to go somewhere?" I asked her.

Her eyes met mine, and she looked skeptical.

"Where?" she asked in a hoarse voice.

I winced internally.

"A place I go when I want to get away from reality for a bit," I said like a stupid fortune cookie.

She smiled, and her chocolate eyes sparkled. "Okay," she agreed.

I stood up, then nervously held my hand out.

She took it.

As her hand touched mine, my stomach felt all bubbly, like someone had just shook up a big soda can in my stomach. I felt _happy_.

Bella POV

He held his hand out, and I took it. My stomach went into a weird frenzy. It felt like tons of butterflies had been unleashed and were fluttering around. It reminded me of when in kindergarten Jacob Black had kissed me on the cheek.

I couldn't place this emotion with holding hands with Edward, though, so I just ignored it.

He guided me up the stairs, still holding my hand. His hand was warm, and it reminded me of when I was little when I was scared of the dark at night. My parents got me a blanket, and I named it "Blue". It was always - for some reason - warmer than all my other blankets. It made me forget about the darkness, and fall asleep.

"So, where are we going?" I asked as he handed me a jacket on the hook by the front door once we reached the living room.

"That's my jacket," he told me, "so don't think it's James'."

It was weird how he knew I was scared that it may be James'. I stuffed my arms into the sleeves that reached past my fingertips. He must've had really long arms. I looked at his arms, and they were scarred and full of big muscles. The tops of his arms were round through his short sleeves, and I could see the blue and purple veins jutting out.

"And I can't tell you where we're going," he said with a smirk. "It's a surprise."

I pouted up at him. I hadn't even realized he was so tall. My head was at his shoulder.

"How old are you?" I asked.

He opened the front door for me, and I went through, still staring at him in the eyes.

"I'm seventeen."

I nodded. Only three years older, and for some reason I was happy about that. Why would I care if he was way older than me?

"Come on," he said, pulling me across the dirt covered ground.

There was no grass outside their house. There were trailer homes everywhere, and where Edward lived was the only actual house. His house was small, and it reminded me of the type of house Jessica - one of my few, not-so-close friends - would make fun of, saying that "poor people" lived there. If I had found at that she would do that to Edward's house, I'd probably slap her across the face.

I didn't know why, but the thought of her making fun of him bothered me.

Edward pulled something from the side of his house and wheeled it out.

It was a bike.

"A bike?" I asked, staring at it.

He smiled. "I don't have a car," he explained. "Obviously."

I eyed the bike nervously. There was only one seat, and I didn't know how to ride a bike, so where would I sit?

"Where am I sitting?" I asked.

His smile grew. "On the handle bars."

My eyes widened, and he was still smiling.

"Uh, no," I said.

"Why not? You think I would let you fall?" he asked, his eyes sad. I knew it was fake sadness, trying to reel me into sitting on the stupid handlebars.

"No…" I mumbled like a little pushover. "I just…I never rode a bike before and…I don't want to fall," I stuttered. I looked back up at him, and he was grinning again.

"I can teach you how to ride a bike," he said. "And you won't fall. I never fell off my bike, and all you have to do is sit there."

I glared at the silver, shining handlebars.

"Fine," I sighed.

He walked over to me, then hesitantly lifted me by the waist, and set me on the handlebars. My stomach got butterflies again by his electric touch. As soon as he let go of my waist, I clutched the handlebars tightly until my knuckles turned white.

He laughed as he walked to the seat of the bike. He put his hands over mine, and my heart started beating so fast, I was afraid it would break my ribcage. He started pedaling the bike, and I shut my eyes tightly, chanting over and over in my head that I wouldn't fall off the bike.

Edward POV

I was taking her to the willow tree down the road. It was a place I had found that fateful night…. I had run away from "home", and found the willow tree. It was a big tree, with long leaves that hung down, and seemed to caress my body as I walked through. Inside the willow tree was a big boulder, the perfect size for my twelve year old form to sit on.

There was a swamp next to it, with little ducks swimming around in it. The moon was full, the sky was a dark blue with stars lighting it up. I was finally at peace, away from my abusive new "father". However, James had found me, beating my ass all the way home.

Despite that part, this place was very calming. The willow tree was the place I always went to when James left to work at Phil's Motor Workshop - a dirty ass mechanic building for the assholes who didn't go to college.

I stopped the bike once we reached the big tree surrounded by nothing but a pond and a dusty pathway that led into the willow tree, with flowers on the side.

"What is it?" she asked as I helped her from the bike, getting the girly tingly feeling again. I felt like a loser.

"It's my willow tree," I told her, pulling her into it.

I pushed the leaves out of the way, and led her inside. I watched her face as she looked around, and her big eyes were wide as she took it all in.

"It's…magical." She laughed, and I realized that I hadn't ever heard her laugh until then, and her _laugh_ was fucking magical. "I know I sound like a loser using the word 'magical', but…it is."

I smiled, and sat down with my back to the trunk of the tree.

She sat on the boulder, wrapping her arms around her knees and staring at me.

"Can we play a game?" she asked timidly.

I raised an eyebrow. "A game?"

She nodded, pulling at her dirt covered shoelaces.

"It's a game to learn about someone you don't really know," she explained. "I ask you a question, then you ask me one."

"All right," I agreed. "Go ahead." I nodded for her to go.

She pursed her lips, getting a crease between her eyebrows, and I made sure to remember that she got that when she was thinking hard.

"Is James your dad?" she asked, staring at the muddy grass.

"Not really," I told her.

"What do you mean?" she asked, still staring at the ground.

"He's my 'step' dad. He…" I didn't know how to tell her about my past, about how I was probably a really fucked up person. But when I looked up into her eyes, I just told her. "He killed my parents, then took me."

Bella POV

Tears welled up in my eyes as I pictured a little Edward watching his parents be murdered, then being taken away.

How could that…asshole do that?!

"Why are you crying?" he asked quietly, staring at me with pain in his eyes.

I wiped my tears away with the sleeves of his jacket.

"Because…that's horrible." I sniffled and felt like a pathetic, little baby. I probably was to him. He was three years older than me, after all.

He rolled his eyes. "As you said before, I don't want your pity. It has been five years. It's all in the past."

Now I rolled my eyes. "Something like that isn't just shuffled away," I said knowingly.

He shrugged. "Next question," he said.

I let that slide, and waited for him to ask me a question.

"Are you afraid of me?"

I wasn't expecting that question. I was expecting something like, "What's your favorite color?". Not that.

_Was _I afraid of him? I should have been. He was the "son" of my kidnapper. I was alone, in the middle of nowhere with someone I barely knew. He could kill me if he wanted to. He could rape me if he wanted to. Yet, I wasn't afraid. I actually felt safe. As disturbing and mental as that sounded, it was true. How could I fear him?

"No," I answered confidently.

He laughed. "You fucking should be. You shouldn't even be talking to me. You should be shitting your pants and running away screaming."

I just stared at him.

"We're both messed up," he said mostly to himself as he stared at his hands as they knotted in his T-shirt. I wasn't sure what he said after that, but it sounded like, "The perfect pair."

I smiled at him.

_The perfect pair._

Did he think of me as part of him?

"Keep on going," he said, breaking me out of my reverie.

"All right," I said, thinking. I decided to go onto lighter topics. "What's your favorite color?"

He laughed.

It went on like that for awhile, until it was dusk, and we hadn't even realized. We just kept sitting under the tree, laughing and talking, and at some points during our time together, I forgot all about the fact that I was kidnapped, that my mom was probably worrying that I could be dead, and in reality, I was actually enjoying myself with Edward.

I felt bad, sick to the core. How could I actually be happy at a time like this? I didn't even want to go home to my family. I wanted to stay here, with Edward, forever. Was that wrong? Was I bad for wanting something so bad?

Edward POV

I shook my head as I laughed along with her as she told the story of her first attempt at riding a bike - she fell into a bush.

I looked over, out of the swaying leaves, and my eyes bugged out of my head. The sky wasn't the clear blue it had been this morning, it was a midnight blue - dusk. It was nighttime, and James was probably home, where Bella and I were supposed to be.

I stood up faster than I thought was possible, and her tinkling laughter suddenly cut off as she probably saw the horrified expression on my face.

"What's-"

"We have to get out of here," I said in a hard voice.

Her eyes were wide and frightened as she hopped off the boulder and basically ran to keep up with my long strides.

I pulled her on the bike a little too roughly, and as soon as she was on, I took off back down the road. I could already see James' car, glittering in the moonlight. My heart pumped nervously as I thought over what would happen.

I looked at the side of Bella's face, and her eyes were wide and blank. She was trembling as she sat, perched on the handlebars.

Now she was afraid. She had reason to be.

I stopped the bike and yanked her off quickly as the bike clattered to the dirt covered ground. I held her forearm tightly and I heard her say, "Ouch," but I was too caught up in getting her inside. Maybe James hadn't noticed yet.

Yeah, that was very unlikely.

I pushed the screen door open with more force than was necessary. James stopped mid-run as he saw me walk in with Bella clinging next to me.

"Where the hell were you?!" he screeched.

Bella was trembling next to me, and I felt her scoot behind me, hiding.

"Uh…" I didn't know what to say. I didn't want to tell him I had a friendship with her, but I couldn't lie and get Bella hurt, so I just shut up.

"You!" he growled, pointing a finger at Bella. "You fucking ran away, didn't you?!"

I heard a small whimper from behind me, and I suddenly got all defensive.

What the _hell _was I thinking?!

"Leave her alone," I growled. I stepped forward, our noses almost touching.

He stepped closer, too, his disgusting chest touching mine.

"What do you think you have with her, Edward?" he asked in a frighteningly calm voice. "You're nothing. You're just a piece of crap."

I internally flinched at his words. They were all true. I _was_ nothing. I was worthless, but that didn't stop the anger that flared up inside of me.

My fist flew forward, meeting his mouth. He flew backwards, landing into the kitchen counter. All the dirty pans with old food stuck to them crashed to the ground. The sound was like thunder.

"Run!" I yelled at Bella.

She looked up at me and she had tears in her eyes.

"Fucking run!" I ordered.

She turned around hastily, running away from me.


	3. I Can Feel The Thunder

Chapter 3

Bella POV

I ran somewhere. I had no clue where I was going. Edward protected me, he saved me, and it might have cost his life. I heard screaming behind me as I ran quickly past all of the trees, weaving in and out of view of Edward's house.

"Bella, don't come back!" I heard him shout.

I stopped. He sounded broken. I turned around, peeking through the trees at the house as I heard them fighting. My foot started twitching, just yearning for me to go run and save him.

_Like I could save him_, I thought unhopefully.

I had to try, though.

I started running again, but back to the house. I came into the room to see Edward being beaten. James' fists continued repeatedly to smack into him, drops of ruby flying into the air.

"Stop!" I screeched.

James looked up at me, his face deranged. He laughed. "You're really stupid," he said, his laughing continuing as he approached me.

Edward was on the ground, blood streaming down his face.

James grabbed a kitchen knife and held it to my throat, putting a little pressure on it.

"Do you want to die?" he asked in a sickening whisper. It made my stomach twist uncomfortably.

I shook my head, and the knife came harder against my throat from the movement.

Suddenly, James was gone. I looked around, dazed and disoriented. I saw Edward holding the knife with James on the ground. James kicked up at Edward's hand, and the knife fell at my feet. I stared at it in fear. It was curved at the end, like it was grinning smugly as the light from the kitchen shined on it.

"Bella, just get out of here," Edward growled as he continued fighting James.

I shook my head vehemently.

James punched Edward - _hard._

He fell to the ground, blood pouring from his mouth, onto the dirty carpet.

"Edward!" I didn't even realize the scream came from _my _mouth. I hadn't even controlled myself into doing so. It was a natural reaction, which was strange.

"Now," James said in a frighteningly calm voice, "what to do with you?"

I gulped and backed up in front of Edward's unconscious body, protecting him.

"Don't touch him," I snarled.

He grinned. "Wasn't planning on it." He lunged at me.

I gasped as my clear vision was suddenly full of black spots. I blinked rapidly, trying to see through them; I couldn't. I felt a warm liquid pooling into my mouth. It tasted like metal.

I couldn't hear anything. It was like everything was muffled, like a radio with bad reception. I could feel my body being moved, but I didn't know where. I couldn't control anything. I tried opening my now shut eyes, but they stayed shut. I tried moving my hands but couldn't find them.

It was as if someone had draped a very heavy blanket on me, engulfing everything in darkness. I searched for a way out, but came out empty each time. I felt like I was stuck in one of those Halloween mazes I used to go into when I went pumpkin picking as a kid. I could never find my way out and someone had to always rescue me from the confinements of the maze.

Someone had to rescue me from here, too.

Edward POV

"Don't touch him." It was Bella's voice. She brought me back from unconsciousness.

"Wasn't planning on it," James said.

My eyes snapped open in time to see James' fist smash into her eyes.

"No!" I gasped.

James didn't pay any attention to me. I watched as he carried Bella in his arms, down into the basement.

I stood up, and my legs were shaking; I could barely stand. I stood at the top of the stairs and watched as he carelessly threw her against the wall. Her limp, unconscious body fell to the cold ground with a loud thump.

"Bitch," he spat as he stared down at her.

There was blood pooling onto the ground where her head lay, and I was consumed in panic.

Would she die from blood loss? It didn't look like a lot, so I tried to hold onto that piece of information.

_She'd be okay, _I thought. _By the looks of it, _I added as an afterthought.

James came up the stairs and stared at me.

"You're a dumb boy, Edward," he said, shaking his head. "Go to bed and take care of that cut."

I touched my lip and looked down at my hand to see red covering my fingertips.

"We don't need blood around here. That's fucking disgusting." He walked away, into his room to sleep.

_What a fucking prick._

I went into the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. My unruly bronze hair was sticking to my face, covering my eyes. There was blood dripping down my chin into the porcelain white sink. I washed away the blood and watched as the water turned red, slowly spiraling down the drain to who knows where.

I just felt like I got hit in the face with a wrecking ball when I remembered what had just happened. I stared back at my reflection in the mirror and saw my eyes. They were wide, and more green than I had ever seen them.

Bella came back. For _me_.

I stared myself down in the mirror, as if the answer would just magically appear there.

Why didn't she get away when she had the chance? Why did she care what James did to me? I was a bad guy, and I didn't even deserve her respect.

I dried my face off with a towel, then decided I needed the answers.

_Now._

I went as quietly as possible from the bathroom - the towel still in my hand - and to where I knew Bella would be. I took the steps two at a time, and watched as she cried, holding her bloody face in her hands. I didn't think she even knew I was there.

"Damn," I muttered.

Her face shot up, and I saw the familiar blush color her cheeks.

"Look at you…" I murmured, walking over to her.

She just stared at me, her eyes brimming with tears, blood streaming down her cheeks. Her right eye was swollen, with a purplish blue bruise underneath it. I could see the blood pumping from her nose and I held the towel up to it.

"You're so fucking stupid," I scolded. "Why did you come back?"

She bit her lip and looked down at her hands that lay limp on her thighs.

"I…" She sighed loudly.

I continued staring her down.

"I like you," she whispered in a soft voice. "I couldn't just leave you there to die."

I snorted. "I could've gotten away."

She rolled her eyes then winced.

"I don't care," she said in a strong voice. "If you're here, then I'm here, too."

I tried ignoring the way my heart swelled at her words.

"Yeah, well, having you get your ass beaten doesn't really make me feel better."

She shrugged. "I wanted to stay."

I was confused. So what were we?

"So what are we?" I asked aloud.

She pursed her lips, getting the little crease in the middle of her eyebrows.

"We're friends."

Bella POV

He grinned crookedly at me, making it slightly hard to think coherently.

I smiled back. Just to ruin the moment, I yawned.

He chuckled. "You sleep, I'll stay here until you do."

I nodded. I didn't want to sleep on the cold ground, though, so unthinkingly, I pulled Edward to me.

He stiffened, but didn't pull away, so I continued.

I pulled him against the wall next to me, then rested my head in his lap. I sighed in contentment.

"Goodnight, Edward."

I felt myself go under into a peaceful bliss, and the last thing I heard was Edward's soft reply, "Goodnight, Bella."

Edward POV

She was out quickly. I didn't want to leave her. Her breaths were even, and they were like a lullaby, lulling me to sleep. I pushed a few stray strands of hair out of her eyes and stared at her. Despite the dried blood covering most of her face, she was beautiful.

She was _mine._

Well, technically not mine, but she was _my _friend.

Her hands were in little fists around my t-shirt, and I had to pry her hands off. I didn't want to just leave her head on the disgusting floor, so like a fucking loser, I went back upstairs and got her a blanket and pillow.

I lifted her head gently, then set the blanket down on her. I just stood there for awhile, watching over her. I wanted to always keep her safe. I didn't want anything like this to ever mangle her face again.

"I like you, too," I whispered to her sleeping form. I walked away then, back to my room - back to hell.

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**Thank you all for the reviews! Keep them coming, and I'm glad you're all enjoying this story :) Keep reading 'cause there's lots more to come. Oh, and by the way, the song used for this chapter is Blinding by Florence and the Machine :)**

**See ya all soon!**


	4. Thinking of You

Chapter 4

Bella POV

I was woken up by the violent growling of my stomach. It wasn't just the animalistic growling, it was also the intense roll of nausea. I sat up quickly, letting the torrents of vomit pour from my mouth. I kept choking and shaking violently as more and more sputtered out of my mouth.

Once it finally stopped, I took a deep, shaky breath. I looked around the sun lit basement, but the room was moving. My head was aching so intensely that I couldn't keep my head up. I fell back to the floor and realized there was a pillow and blanket.

_Edward. _

I smiled around the pain, pulling the pillow to my nose. It smelled like him -raspberries, but not in a girly way. I couldn't explain the smell. It was icy, with a tint of the raspberries I loved so much in it.

I then realized where this pain was coming from. It was because of the hunger. I hadn't eaten or drank anything in two days. If I kept this up, I'd be dead tomorrow.

I felt the sickening twisting in my stomach again, so I turned quickly to where I had last vomited and let it go.

_Disgusting, _I thought as I stared at it all.

Edward POV

"Edward!" James shouted as he bustled into my room.

I turned over in my bed, shielding my eyes from the sunlight pouring in through my window.

"What the hell do you want?" I mumbled sleepily.

His face was red with anger as he paced around in my tiny room.

"Because of you and that slut, I can't go to work anymore! I can't trust you anymore!"

I stood up from the bed, and just as stupidly as yesterday, I went up in his face.

"First off, you don't fucking call her a slut, because she isn't one," I growled. "Second, if you want to go to work so bad, why don't you just let her fucking go?!" I questioned.

"Because," he smirked, "I'm not finished with her yet."

"You bastard," I hissed. I grabbed his neck in my fist and clenched it tightly, smacking his back against the wall of my room, making it crack with the amount of force I exerted. "What the hell are you going to do to her?" I demanded.

He grinned. "I can't tell you that," he said. "It would ruin all the fun."

My eyes fucking twitched. "_Fun?!" _I spat. "You think kidnapping an innocent girl is _fun?!_ "

He smirked and shoved my chest away.

I let go and just continued glaring at him.

"Beats slaughtering your pathetic parents."

The memories I had shoved away in a big filing cabinet that clearly said: **DON'T FUCKING READ! **came flooding back into my mind.

My mom screaming and telling me to run as James broke his way through our living room window. My dad's blood spurting out as James' knife cut through his pale skin, hitting me in the face. Twelve year old me, crawled up in a ball in the corner of the room, watching as James approached me, holding the knife dripping with my parents' blood.

"You're mine now," he had said in a deranged voice.

The last time I had seen my parents, it was of their mangled bodies laying on the ground, dripping with ruby red blood.

I was taken away from my parents. James said my purpose was to help him. With what, he had never told me.

I shook my head, trying to fan the memories out of my head. They disappeared -for the moment.

"You _can_ trust me," I said. "I won't let her escape." My voice was lifeless, a droning monotone.

He grinned and put his hand on my shoulder.

"This is who you are, Edward. You're a bad guy, just like me."

I just stared at him.

"I'm going to work. Don't feed her."

My eyes finally got a little life back in them at the mention of Bella.

"Why can't I feed her?" I asked.

"Well," he said, "I decided I might let her starve to death, or rape her before she dies."

My eyes were wide.

"I'm leaving now, kid. Watch her." With that, he left.

I got ready, all the while thinking of what James had said, then headed downstairs to be met with the sound of choking.

"Bella?" I called. I stopped once I saw her.

She was hunched over, vomiting repeatedly onto the floor.

"Bella!" I ran over to her. I held her hair back as more and more stomach acid erupted from her mouth. "Bella, what the hell is happening to you?!" I shouted helplessly.

She took deep, shuddering breaths.

"I-" She started puking again. "Need…food-" Again. "Or water."

She was fucking starving.

"How long has it been since you ate?" I asked anxiously.

She shut her eyes, getting the crease between her eyebrows.

"About two days. I ate last at school before James took m-" She groaned loudly and grabbed her head. "I can't see," she moaned. :My head - it hurts too much. It's making me too dizzy." She started crying. All of her hot tears dripped down my hands.

I stared at her helplessly.

"Shit," I cursed under my breath. I lifted her into my arms, cradling her against my chest like she was a baby. Her head and legs hung off the sides of my arms. Her arms hung limply at her sides.

I started up the stairs quickly, holding her as still as possible as I went up the stairs. I set her down on the couch and searched the pantry for any edible food.

Everything was fucking decomposing, but I at least found some water. I started giving it to her from the cup I had found, urging her to drink it slow. I had read somewhere that that helped. I examined her face once she had drank the whole cup, and she was holding her face, groaning. I kneeled down next to her and pushed all her sweaty hair away.

"Listen, Bella," I said quietly.

She turned her head slowly, her deep eyes staring up at me with all the trust in the world.

"I'm going to go to the store to get you something edible to eat. Everything here is fucking dead."

She smiled a little through the pain.

"Do you want anything in particular?" I asked as I grabbed money that I wasn't supposed to take from James' "secret" money jar that sat on the counter in plain sight.

"Uh…" She started coughing again, and I thought she was going to fucking vomit. "Pizza," she said in a raspy voice. "I don't care what kind."

I nodded. I picked her up off the couch and carried her into my room. I set her down on my bed.

"Don't fucking vomit in here," I said sternly. "This is my room."

She chuckled. "I'll try."

I grabbed my bike, then rode from the house and to find some store to find her food.

Bella POV

I looked around Edward's room, intrigued. For some reason I was curious about what his room looked like. I stood shakily from the bed and looked around, trying to see through the dizziness that plagued me. I stepped down onto the wooden floor, and there was a loud creak. I looked down at it. It was just like any other floor board, except it was sticking out, and not perfectly down like the other ones.

I kneeled down next to it and pulled it off. I knew I was intruding by ripping a floorboard off his floor to see what was under it, but I didn't care. I was curious.

There, nestled nicely under ground, were books - piles and piles of them.

I gingerly picked one up, reading the title.

_Romeo and Juliet_.

My eyebrows rose.

I had never met a guy who secretly read romance novels. I smiled as I continued picking up more and more gooey, girly novels. It was such a contradiction. It was oddly comforting. These were all the classics, all the books I had always wanted to read. These were the books my mother had never permitted me to read because I was always "busy". It was always piano lessons, or school, or shopping, or some other stupid "activity" I had no desire doing.

Like I cared about buying a new dress. I'd rather wear my jeans; I didn't really care.

Seeing these books hidden under his floorboards gave me an odd sensation of fitting in. I felt so stupid. I had never ever felt like I had belonged somewhere. Oddly, kidnapped and beaten, I belonged here. I belonged with Edward.

I…didn't know what I was feeling. I didn't know what the swell of affection that washed through my heart like a tidal wave was. I didn't understand why I had risked my own life to save his. Maybe I…. Could I?

Edward POV

I returned from the store, fresh, hot and ready to eat pizza in hand. I walked into my room to find my floor board plucked out of the ground, my hidden book stash everywhere, and Bella sitting on my bed, reading one of the books.

When she met my gaze her cheeks turned red and she bit her lip.

"Uh, hi," she said in an uncharacteristically self conscious voice.

I eyed her uneasily and set the pizza on the edge of the bed by her feet.

"Hi," I replied, still staring at her quizzically.

"I hope you don't mind she said, stumbling off the bed and cleaning the books off the floor. "I just…I saw the books, and I liked them, and I wanted to read them-" She still had a blush on her face as I stared at her flustered face, grinning, "and I-" I put my finger over her mouth.

"Just…" I laughed, "shut up."

Her face darkened, and I didn't even know how that was fucking possible.

"Right," she said, nodding. "I'll shut up." Her eyes went down and she stared at the pizza box with hungry eyes.

I laughed then motioned for her to go.

"Go crazy," I said.

She darted over to the pizza, shoving the biggest slice into her mouth. She moaned and groaned, so I guessed that it was good.

She looked up at me apologetically. "Sorry, I'm being rude. Want some?"

I laughed. "Is it any good?"

She stared at me like I had three fucking heads.

"You never had a piece of pizza before?" she questioned, astonished.

I shook my head. "I don't think so - and if I did, I don't remember. Here, in the household of James, we don't eat any food that you wouldn't find outside a garbage can."

Her big eyes were wide. She reached into the box and handed me a slice.

"Eat it," she ordered.

As if I could say no to her.

I took a big bite, and my tongue almost exploded.

"Holy fucking shit!" I gushed.

She nodded. "I know, right?"

So we continued eating pizza together. I got us some sodas and we drank and talked and laughed. We even talked a little bit about the books. She asked if they were good, saying she wanted to read them. I told her to read them because every girl had to read a romance novel. She blushed and smiled more frequently than I had seen since she arrived, and it made me grin at her.

I was happy that she was happy.

However, happy times ended once six o'clock rolled around. I threw the empty pizza box out my bedroom window - the disgusting raccoons would get it - and we headed back down stairs to the basement. I told her I'd see her again tonight, and she got an odd gleam in her eyes that I had never seen before. I didn't question it and went upstairs to where James came in, drunk as hell.

This would not be good.

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**It has come to my attention that a lot of people are favoriting and reading my story, but not reviewing. I mean, I know having reviews doesn't mean much to some people, but it means a lot to me. Please, if you're going to read, have the respect to the author to tell them how you feel about it. Getting reviews encourages me on the story, and makes me happy :) I like to hear you guys' thoughts on this story, so please, if you read, review.**


	5. Spotlight Is On

Chapter 5

Bella POV

I smiled as the realization hit me again.

I liked Edward. Not like as in I liked him as a friend. No, I liked him as in…I _wanted _him. I wanted Edward to be mine. I wanted to just stare at his beautiful emerald eyes forever.

"James!" It was Edward's voice from upstairs. Simultaneously, there was a loud crash that sounded like glass.

I stiffened when I remembered where I was. I edged back against the cold wall, curling up in ball, trying to be as small as possible, as if that would make me disappear.

"St-" Edward's voice was cut off, and I heard another bang.

Tears welled up in my eyes as I watched the door at the top of the stairs slowly open. A dark figure that was larger than Edward was standing there. He was swaying a little.

"Bella Swan." He started laughing as he drunkenly made his way down the stairs. "You're Edward's little pet, aren't you?" He stopped at the bottom of the stairs, staring at me. His eyes were still hollow, empty. They stared at me, but it was like staring into an owl's knowing gaze. They stared at you with a knowing stare, but you didn't know what they were thinking. At least when humans stared at someone, there was _some _emotion there. But in James' eyes, there wasn't. "You like him, huh?"

I pushed myself even further against the wall - not that there was any space left.

"Do you like me?" he asked. He crouched down in front of me, tilting his head to the side. "You know…" he continued since I was obviously not going to respond, "Bella means beautiful."

I gulped.

His dirty hand reached out and touched my chin and he rubbed it. "And you _are _beautiful."

I turned my head away, staring at the floor as tears brimmed over my eyes.

"Look at me," he ordered in a slurred voice.

I didn't - I wouldn't.

"Look at me!" He grabbed my face roughly and I had no choice but to stare into those scary, grey eyes. "So pretty…" he whispered like a drunken idiot.

Unthinkingly, I stuck my foot out and kicked him in the chest; hard.

He fell over with a grunt.

I got up off the floor and started running for the stairs.

"Ed-" I was about to shout for Edward, but something - or someone - smacked into me, sending me sailing to the steps. My head cracked against the wooden steps and tons of dust particles flew up into the air.

"Where do you think you're going?!" he asked crazily.

"Let me go," I hissed between clenched teeth as I repeatedly kicked and smacked at him to no avail.

He slapped my cheek, and my head turned to the side from the impact. Everything was blurry, and the sounds around me kept getting loud then quiet in a disgruntled haze.

He said something, but it sounded like an annoying buzz in my ear.

I felt him pin my hands at my sides, and I kicked blindly around, but he didn't move. I looked down, then saw James taking his pants off.

A scream erupted from my mouth once I realized what he was going to do. His hand covered my mouth.

"Edward!" I screamed from under his hand as tears of sheer terror ran hot down my cheeks.

Edward POV

"Motherfucker," I mumbled as I rolled around in the glass that I was thrown into. "Ugh, that's disgusting." I stared at the blood oozing from a deep gash in my arm full of pieces of glass.

I stood up from the pile of shattered glass and brushed it off me.

"Edward!" It was Bella's muffled voice from downstairs.

_I am an asshole. _

I fucking forgot. How could I forget? What an idiot!

I ran to the stairs and stopped at the top once I saw what and who was on the bottom stairs.

James and Bella.

James was on top of her, his pants down. One of his hands was holding her hands above her head, the other was over her mouth.

My eyes got wide as Bella met my gaze. She looked up at me, her eyes full of tears. The other eye was still bruised from the other day.

I jumped down the stairs and smacked into James like an animal. I started punching him and kicking him.

"Edward, what the hell are you doing?!" he yelled as I continued beating the crap out of him.

"Beating your worthless ass," I growled.

He punched me in the jaw and I flew off him, landing on the ground. My head smacked against the cement floor, and my eyes shut.

_Stay awake, _I told myself. _For Bella._

I opened my eyes and James was holding a shard of glass to Bella's throat.

"You touch me again, and I kill her."

I sat on the floor, staring at him dumbly.

"Don't…" I choked out.

There was a loud banging on the door, and simultaneously, a deep male voice said, "It's the police. Open up."

James stared at me, his eyes wide.

"You did this," he hissed in a whisper.

I shook my head vehemently.

He glared at me, then threw Bella to me.

"Stay here," he ordered.

I pulled Bella to my chest and she clung to me with fistfuls of my shirt in her hands. She stuffed her face into the crook of my neck, shaking.

"I'll go see what they want. Keep her quiet." He trudged up the stairs, shutting the basement door behind him.

I held Bella to my chest and crawled over to a spot in the corner of the basement where no one could see us.

"Are you all right?" I whispered into her hair, holding her close. She smelled amazing.

She nodded, still crying. She looked up at me. "I am now."

I smiled at her and kissed her forehead.

Why did I do that?

_Oh god, I hope she doesn't hit me or something, _I fretted internally.

I looked down at her nervously.

She was…smiling with a blush on her face.

_Fine with me_, I thought happily.

I heard the front door open, then two people walk in.

"What can I do for you?" I heard James ask calmly.

"What happened to your face?" another man asked.

"Oh, I got into a little accident at work. I work at the automobile shop, and I had a little…problem with one of the car-"

"Okay," one of the police men said, "we don't need a life story."

There was silence for awhile.

"May I ask why you're here?" James asked again in a slightly irritated voice.

"Oh, right," one cop said. "Have you heard of the disappearance of Isabella Swan?"

Bella stopped shaking and looked at the door.

I wished now more than ever that I could know what she was thinking.

Bella POV

All I had to do was yell. If I did, Edward would let me go. I'd be out of here, back home.

My brow furrowed.

Back to mom and dad arguing night after night, being overworked with school and piano lessons, having no time to hangout with my friends or do something for myself, and worst of all…no Edward.

Over these past three days, I had grown dependent on Edward. I needed him now. I couldn't imagine a day without him. He just always made me feel so safe, and I could always just be myself around him. I had never, in my entire life, talked to anyone as much as I talked to him.

There was one more thing…

If I turned in James and set myself free, wouldn't Edward go, too? He was an accomplice, even though he took care of me and ensured my survival. Maybe I could explain that to the police. They'd probably just think I was delusional, or that Edward had scared me into saying that. No one would know the truth. No one except for James, Noah and myself.


	6. If You Could Only See The Beast In Me

**Since I have no life :P I have all the time in the world to keep putting chapters up. Sorry for the two short chapters - really long ones are coming soon :) KEEP REVIEWING IF YOU WANT THEM TO COME FASTER :D**

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Chapter 6

I looked at Edward, and he was staring at the door intensely as James and the two cops who could save me continued talking.

"Well…bye," Edward whispered, his brow furrowing.

I waited for his eyes to meet mine, but he wouldn't.

"Why would I go?" I asked, as if it wasn't obvious. The obvious answer would be to save my goddamn life, but…I couldn't bring myself to really care. Death wouldn't be so bad, as long as Edward was safe.

He finally met my gaze, and his eyes were full of pain. "Because you can't stay," he whispered.

"I…have to," I whispered as heat slithered up to my cheeks.

He traced his thumb against my cheek and tilted my chin to look at him. I did with a lot of reluctance.

"If this is about me," he started, "you're making a big mistake."

I furrowed my brow, pouting a little bit.

"Why would I be making a mistake?" I asked.

"Because…" He looked away again, the same pain as before in his eyes. "I can't let you stay. It's wrong. Friends or not…. You should be home."

I was shaking my head before he finished. "I won't go," I said firmly. "You can't make me." I glowered at him.

His eyes went into slits as he whispered so quickly I could barely make it out. "It's not good for you here. I'm not a good friend, Bella. I'm…bad."

I frowned, staring at him as he stared at me with unseeing eyes. It was like he wasn't even looking at me. He seemed to be lost in thought, or a far away memory.

"You _are_ good," I whispered back as the footsteps upstairs moved around the house.

"No," he whispered almost inaudibly. "I'm not."

I returned my eyes from the basement door and back to him to see his arm with red trailed from the forearm to his jeans where a big, black spot was growing bigger and bigger.

"Edward!" I hissed, my hands flittering over the gash on his arm uselessly. "What happened to you?!" I inspected the gash and saw little, glistening pieces of glass lodged inside. I almost threw up.

He shrugged nonchalantly, and I wanted to slap him.

"Edward, this is serious," I hissed. "Y-you have to stop the bleeding." I wasn't really an expert on how to take care of things like this, and the thought that he might _die _made me all stupidly flustered.

Without removing his gaze from somewhere on the floor, he pulled his grey T-shirt over his head, revealing his chest.

My eyes widened as I ogled him shamelessly.

"See? he whispered, still not looking at me.

I think drool might have been hanging from the corner of my mouth as I continuously raked over his bare, sculpted chest. I shook my head, remembering he said something.

"See what?" I asked, dazed.

He gestured to his chest as he wound the T-shirt around his arm.

I pushed his hand away, using my own to slow the bleeding.

"Umm, if you mean your _bare_ chest-" I tried very hard not to accentuate the word "bare", but I did, "then yes." I gulped.

He rolled his eyes, finally meeting my gaze. "Look at me," he hissed through clenched teeth.

I diverted my eyes from his enraged expression, and to his chest, gasping as I finally realized what he was talking about.

There were pinkish, silver scars scattered across his chest, upper arms, and stomach. They were all different sizes and shapes, but they were there, and very visible.

And they were the hottest thing I had ever seen.

"Yes, I see," I said, staring him in the eyes.

His brows furrowed, as if he was disappointed by my answer.

"Bella, good guys don't have scars _everywhere _on their body. _Bad _guys do."

"But you're not bad, so it's a moot point, anyway."

His nostrils flared. "You don't fucking get it!" He threw his arm that wasn't dripping with blood in the air. "I'm just as bad as James! You don't think I've hurt people? That I…" He shook his head. "You don't get it," he whispered again, stuffing his face in his hands.

I nervously reached a hand out and swiped it across his chest.

He stiffened, but I didn't stop.

I traced the lines and circles, and all the other shapes. I felt the bump of bigger scars, felt the jagged, healed skin on my fingertips, and I loved every second of it.

"I don't care," I said in what I hoped was a strong voice. "I don't see you as anything but Edward, the guy who saved my life, and the guy that reads girly, romance novels."

A smile twitched at his lips.

Edward POV

I stuffed my face in my hands, fighting the anger and pain that was raging through me. I liked Bella - a lot. Too much than was normal for someone who's only known a person for like two days. The problem was that I wasn't fucking good enough for her. I knew I liked her more than a friend. I - this sounds like a little kid, but… - I like, liked her. But she didn't know; she didn't know the monster that I was. She didn't understand the things I had to do in order to survive. She didn't understand that I had tons of fucking issues. I wanted her, but I couldn't have her.

I felt like fucking Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eve. I was those idiots, and she was the delicious, pure apple. I couldn't have her, and taking her would be like tainting the perfection of humanity before those assholes took the apple.

I felt three, warm fingers sweep against my chest, and I stiffened.

She was…touching my scars. I would've thought she'd be repulsed, and want to vomit on my fucking head. However, she wasn't repulsed or nauseated by my tattered chest.

I didn't stop her, even though I should have. She continued tracing the shapes of each scar, then she said quietly but strongly, "I don't care. I don't see you as anything but Edward, the guy who saved my life, and the guy that reads girly, romance novels."

A smile made its way to my lips as hard as I tried not to let it.

I finally looked back up at her. "So you don't think I'm…a bad person?" I asked curiously.

She shook her head.

It was silent for awhile, then she said, "I couldn't leave you because…"

I stared down at her as she hid her face in her hair.

"What?" I urged.

"Because I…like you. I mean, I-I _like _you."

She just said…she like, liked me, too.

"You mean like, _like_, like?"

She chuckled nervously then nodded. "Yes."

"I…"

She looked up at me, her cheeks flaming red.

"I really like you, too."

She smiled a big, toothy grin. "Thank God," she sighed. "Because if you didn't, I'd probably die from embarrassment."

I chuckled, shaking my head.

Then, when a loud bang was heard from upstairs, we were brought back to reality, and not the glowing, lovey-dovey place we were just in.

Bella stiffened at my side as James yelled, "Well, I hope the kids not dead!" The front door slammed, then there were footsteps, and the basement door slowly creaked open, revealing James' black silhouette.

He trudged down the stairs, his dirt covered boots clonking down on each wooden step until he stopped in front of Bella and me, sitting in a dark corner of the basement. Bella's hand was still pressed to my gash as she crawled as far behind me as possible, shielding herself from James.

I couldn't blame her. He wasn't nice to look at.

"The stupid cops are gone," he said, thinking we couldn't fucking hear them from down here. He stepped closer, and a deep, and guttural growl exploded from my mouth.

"Step the fuck away," I hissed between clenched teeth.

Frank stopped in his tracks and smiled, staring at Bella. "But we weren't done with our…lovemaking." He winked at her, and I think a whole part of my brain snapped in half.

I jumped from my sitting position quicker than James expected and shoved him into a ton of crates.

"You won't touch her - you won't even look at her," I growled, my fists clenching at my sides.

He shuffled around in the boxes and sat up, rubbing his head. "What the fuck, Edward? You're supposed to be my son."

I shook my head, my eyes in slits. "You're not my father."

He was silent. It seemed to have bothered him that I told him that. He had always thought of me as his son. For what reason, I didn't fucking know.

I _never _thought of him, in any way, as my dad. I thought of him as some ass God forced upon me.

He stood up, then stalked from the room. I heard the fridge open, then the clinking of glass bottles, then his bedroom door slam shut.

He was going to totally drink himself into oblivion.

I turned to Bella. "Want to go?" I asked.

She stared at me strangely. "Where?"

"Back to the willow tree."

She nodded and took the hand I held out to her.

We snuck out through the basement window, and rode the stupid bike back to _our _spot.


	7. I Was Made To Taste Your Kiss

**Some people wanted to know why Edward and Bella don't just escape. Here's your answer: First, James would look for them, and if he found them, they'd most likely be killed. They have no idea where they are. Edward has been never allowed to leave his house, and Bella is just in the middle of nowhere obviously. Second, if they told the police, Edward would most definitely go to jail even if Bella said it wasnt true. They'd think that she was scared into saying that. I hope it's cleared up. If you have anymore questions, just ask in a review :)**

* * *

Chapter 7

Bella POV

I sat down next to Edward on the rock. I lay next to him, one arm behind my head, the other, holding his hand. The feeling of the currents of electricity flowing through our touching skin was amazing. It made me smile, my heart filling with joy. I went over the words he had said before in my mind. He said he was bad, and that he did "things". What did that mean?

"Edward?" I asked nervously, afraid he'd get mad to have to tell me about his past.

He looked at me, his eyes full of distress. He looked horrible, and not in a way like someone just got beaten up - which he did. No, he looked horrible as in an emotional wreck.

I rolled onto my side, watching as his thumb traced comforting circles on the side of my hand.

"Will you tell me?" I whispered, staring at our entwined hands.

It was silent, the only sound was crickets in the background, and it fit the very tenuous atmosphere.

"About what?" he whispered back, staring off into the top of the willow tree.

"About…your life - before James, I mean," I stuttered nervously.

His eyebrows knitted together, and I bit my lip.

"You said that I didn't understand," I said. "I want to understand," I pretty much pleaded. "I want to know every part of you."

He met my pleading gaze, and his eyes still held that same sadness. "It's bad," he whispered almost inaudibly. "I don't…I don't want you to think…" He groaned.

I rolled my eyes. "Just spit it out, Edward."

He sat up, pulling me onto his lap so I couldn't see his face. "My life sucks," he began.

Edward POV

I stared at the top of her head, trying to keep myself from getting lost in my memories like I usually did when remembering these things. I put my nose against her hair and took a good whiff to keep my head clear and focused on the present.

"I was like any other kid, I guess," I said indifferently. "I had a mom and dad who did it every night, and were happy. I had nice - weird - but nicely smelling grandparents, and…I _was _happy." I frowned, thinking back to my childhood, just like I had just forced myself not to do. I could remember my mom's dimples as she smiled at me, her face almost identical to mine. I could remember my dad teaching me to ride a bike in our front yard in Chicago…. How could everything have changed so rapidly? It seemed as if it was only yesterday.

She nodded encouragingly.

"It was Christmas Eve," I said, my eyes going into the zone of my imagination. "My mom had all these decorations, and she made me wear this really girly, stupid sweater that smelled like bleach." I gagged, trying to lighten the mood, but she wasn't happy with my avoidance.

"Continue," she said.

I rolled my eyes. "So, we were just hanging out. I was twelve." My brow furrowed. "It was late - well, late for a little kid - and my mom was making me go to bed soon, but someone knocked on the door…"

She stiffened.

"My dad answered it," I said, recalling it perfectly. "But when he opened the door, it was empty, just the snow and ice left waiting." I shook my head. "I begged my mom to let me stay up, and she agreed. We were sitting in the living room, just enjoying the rest of the night before 'Santa' came."

She stared at me, her bottomless eyes searching mine with fear. She could feel what was coming. I could imagine that my own fear of just a simple memory was rolling off my body in waves.

"But…" I stopped. I couldn't go on. I could remember the sound of James' nails grating viciously against the frozen window. I could remember the look in my mom's green eyes when she saw him breaking his way through the glass of our window. My dad's chocking sounds as he was gagged by his own blood…

"Edward?" she whispered.

I shook my head. "Sorry," I whispered, and I fucking cursed myself when I heard my voice crack.

_I'm such a girl, _I told myself scornfully.

"You don't have to continue," she told me.

I shook my head. She wanted to know, and she had a right to know. Besides, the more I told her about myself, the more I'd learn from her later.

"James came through our window. Well, not really came. He more or less broke his body through the glass."

She shivered.

"He killed them," I whispered, engulfed in the smell of newly poured blood, the sound of perfect, unscathed flesh being tarred by a sharp knife he had stashed away in his jacket. "My father was first. My mom tried, but…" I stared at the grass, watching as the light from the moon caressed it. "I was left. James took me. I had to keep myself alive, because James wouldn't even feed me."

I felt her fingers on my arm that I hadn't even realized had swooped around her waist tightly.

"I had to do bad things," I whispered, staring at the ground that, in this lighting, looked black and white. Maybe it had turned that way because of my memories. We were traveling backwards, which was a thing I did not want to fucking do. "I had to steal, and hurt people to just live, and…I know my parents would fucking hate me." I felt something warm trailing down my cheek, and I didn't even have enough strength to move my fucking hand and wipe it.

"They'd hate me, Bella. They saw what I did. I didn't even try and help when James hurt them! I just sat there like a fucking…" I shook my head. "So what I'm saying, or trying to get into your thick fucking head, is that I'm not good! Not for my parents, not for you, not even for a goddamn rat!"

She turned and stared at me, her eyes wide.

I could feel the tears splaying down my cheeks, but I didn't care.

"Go home! Get out of here because…you don't belong here! You belong with the big houses, the good food, and…the good guys that would line up for someone like you. Because you…you're like, fucking amazing. I'd give anything to be able to be with you forever, but I just can't.

"I might hurt you. I hurt too many people. You're still here because of me!" The tears stopped as anger took a step to the front of my mind, standing tall and proud, ready to take the stage. "_Go home_!" I yelled again, except it was so loude that she cringed away from me.

I took deep, heaving breaths as I tried to calm down.

Bella dislodged my hand from around her waist and stood, standing over me, glaring down at me.

"You…you fucking prick!" she screamed, pointing a finger down at me.

My mouth fell open.

"You asshole! What the hell…" She groaned and started pacing back and forth across the tiny, grass covered area. "Don't you get it?" she hissed, seething.

I just stared at her.

"I…hate you!"

My eyes widened and I think my heart turned into the fucking Titanic.

"I hate you for making me feel like this." She gestured to herself, finally stopping from her angry strides back and forth. "I don't care that you're messed, because I am, too!" Tears rolled down her cheeks. "My parents weren't the happy couple that laughed and sang around campfires!"

I stared at her.

"My parents are…assholes!" She coughed back tears, trying to stay strong. "They fight and scream and send me off to go to piano lessons because they don't want to be bothered with me! At least you had someone to look up to who actually wanted you!" she cried as she started sobbing.

"What do you mean, 'That actually wanted you'?" I asked.

She sniffled, sitting on the ground and wrapping her arms around her calves.

"I mean, you had someone to look up to. I never had anyone until now." Her green eyes met mine, and they were filled to the brim with tears. "I looked up to you, but…apparently you don't want me around, so…"

I held back the urge to gasp. I kneeled in front of her and placed my palms on her knees.

"You don't honestly think I wouldn't want you, do you?" I whispered intensely, watching as the blush I loved so much colored her cheeks.

"I do think that," she whispered in a shaky voice.

I rolled my eyes. "You're a fucking idiot! Did you not listen to anything I just said! I want you, but you can do way better!"

Her brow furrowed as she looked at her hands.

"I'm not your best choice," I said miserably.

"No, you're not," she said. "But, you're the choice I choose. I wouldn't want anything more, or anything less. I want you, and only you."

Bella POV

He stared at me in wonderment. I felt his breath on my face. It was warm, and made me shiver in blissful pleasure.

"You want me?" he whispered, moving his face closer so that our lips were barely grazing each others.

I nodded, and the movement made our lips slide across each others. I took in a sharp intake of breath. He did, too. I felt his hand slide up to my neck as he put a gentle but firm hand over it. I knew what was coming. I had never kissed a boy before. I was glad that it was _this_ boy doing it.

Our mouths were both open, and I could feel his breath inside my mouth, and it felt like ripping your skin off and jumping off a never-ending cliff. It was totally, and utterly blissful. There were no other words.

His eyes stared directly into mine, and he seemed to be having a self conflict with himself.

"Do you want me?" I whispered breathily, my head stuck in the clouds.

He gulped. "Yes."

I scooted closer, biting my lip. "Then prove it," I breathed across his face.

His breathing stopped and the hand on my neck tightened.

I shut my eyes as he did his, then felt an electric shock run from my lips, to the tips of my hairs, to the tips of my toes. His lips were warm as they wrapped around my bottom lip, and mine went around his top.

Total. Bliss.

I moved my lips against his in synchronization, as if we had rehearsed or something. I guess kissing was just natural. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him closer. He grunted as I leaned into him fully, and I felt his mouth open. His tongue was smooth as it traveled across my bottom lip, and I happily granted him access. I opened my mouth, too, and now, we were basically making out. I trailed my fingers up his chest and yanked at the sides of his jacket, pulling him against me, mashing my breasts against his chest.

He groaned again, and I could feel something…else between us. I had had the customary health class every teen girl who attended Forks High School got. They told us about boys, and what happens when they got… "in the mood".

I shivered in pleasure.

However, it wasn't the same as feeling it jutting into your stomach.

He lowered me to the ground, and I followed suit. He was hovering over me, his hands on either side of my face so he wouldn't press too much of his weight on me.

I tangled my fingers in his hair. It was the first time I had ever felt his hair before, and it felt like down feathers. It was so soft and long, dangling in his eyes. He might of thought of himself as a monster, but he looked like an angel designed by the devil to me.

He kissed my jaw, then stopped at the corner of my mouth.

"We have to stop," he whispered, his breaths staggering.

"Why?" I breathed, tracing my finger along his back.

He groaned. "Because…I don't want you to get fucking impregnated."

Blunt. Very Edward.

I looked at him, and his mouth was open, panting hot breath across my face. I pouted a bit as he stared down at me.

He grinned, then kissed my forehead. "Really, this isn't the place for such things," he laughed.

I looked around, remembering we were under a tree on the dirt covered ground.

"Right," I agreed.

He stood up, holding his hand out to me.

I took it and brushed the dirt covered grass off my butt.

_Very hot, Bella, _I mentally scolded myself.

"Want to go?" he asked, staring through the trees at the moon as it got bigger and bigger.

Everything that had happened today came rushing into my brain. The fight, the truth, the pain, the sorrow, the _lust._ My stomach did flips when I remembered what had just happened. It was what I had always imagined my first kiss to be like. I always wanted one of those kisses where your foot goes in the air, and your heart totally stops, and nothing but his lips and yours is important. It was what I always wanted, and the only person that could give me what I wanted - what I _needed _- was Edward.

I looked back up at Edward, and he was staring down at me, raising an eyebrow, waiting for my answer.

"Oh, right," I said embarrassedly. "Yeah, let's go back."

"All right," he muttered. He turned, but I grabbed his arm.

"Wait," I said.

He just stared down at me.

I put my lips against his lightly, sighing in contentment as I got the jittery feeling in me again. I pulled back, and he grinned at me.

"What was that for?" he asked.

I shrugged. "I was testing something that you didn't believe was possible."

He was silent.

"You said that other guys could be better for me - could give me what I needed, right?"

He nodded hesitantly.

"Well, you were wrong. I don't think _anyone _can give me _that_." I gestured to our lips.

"So are you trying to say I'm a good kisser?" he asked, smirking.

I blushed. "Don't get all cocky."

He laughed then rested his arm over my shoulders, pulling me to his bike.

"Let's get back," he sighed.

Edward POV

As I crawled into the tiny basement window, I heard Bella yawning. I looked up at her once I landed back into the basement. She was swaying, her heavy eyelids drooping.

"Tired?" I whispered so James wouldn't hear. However, he was probably passed out from drinking so much anyway, so…

She nodded and crawled ungracefully through the window. She didn't set her feet down to catch herself, and started falling from the window with a whispered, high pitched, "Eep!" Whatever "eep" meant.

I held my arms out just in time as she fell into them, her head bobbing on her neck. She looked around, dazed and disoriented.

"What happened…?" she slurred, her eyes fighting to stay open.

I shook my head, laughing. "You fell."

"Oh." She stared at me, her head falling over. "I'm tired," she whispered.

"I can tell."

She shut her eyes, leaning her head on my shoulder.

I walked over to the corner where she usually slept, and sat. I kept her in my lap, deciding that I could stay. James probably knew about Bella and I from before. Just as I remembered before, the gash on my arm started to sting.

"Ugh," I groaned quietly. I saw the little slivers of glass still inside.

Bella stirred in my arms, sighing into my neck, making me shiver.

I gently set Bella down on the floor where the pillow and blanket still lay. I walked up the stairs and to the bathroom. I had to take care of this bloody mess. I turned on the bathroom light, and it was like one of those lights they shined on you when you were being questioned in prison. It buzzed loudly, reverberating through my ears annoyingly. I looked in the mirror at myself, and saw blood and black and blues on my face.

"Shit," I cursed quietly.

I poked the tender skin, hissing as it stung. I grabbed the tweezers from the medicine cabinet and began my scavenge for glass in my forearm. I pulled piece after piece. It was fucking never-ending.

I heard the bathroom door slowly creak open and thought it was Bella.

It sure as hell wasn't.

"Edward…" James slurred as he stumbled drunkenly into the bathroom.

I glared at him icily. My jaw was taught, the tweezers hovering above my arm.

"Get the fuck out," I spat.

He frowned and fell backwards into the tub, his head clanking against the grimy wall.

"Edward, you can't talk to your father like that," he said, shaking his head.

I dropped the tweezers, the sound of it hitting the porcelain sink was like thunder in the silent room. I started to shake very visibly, getting more pissed off by the second. I turned around swiftly.

He flinched at my expression.

"You, you crazy fuck, are not my fucking father," I growled. "You ruined my life, and you don't even care." I could feel the tears stinging my eyes, but I forced them to stay back. I would not cry in front of this asshole.

"I didn't ruin your life," he slurred. "I gave you something you would've never gotten without me."

I chuckled humorously. "And what would that be?" I asked, humoring him.

"That Bella girl."

The scowl slipped from my face. I turned back to the sink and continued cleaning out my wound.

"Yeah?" I hissed.

"Yes."

"No." I shook my head. "You also gave me these." I turned, lifting my shirt up. His eyes stared at my shredded chest, but they didn't widened like I hoped they would. I wanted him to feel guilty.

He shrugged. "You're alive, aren't you?"

I took a long, deep breath. "You don't get it, you psychopath. This is the real world. You can't steal people when you feel like it."

He was silent.

"You can't ruin a little kids world because you selfishly, and crazily killed his parents. I'd rather die a fiery, painful death rather than be here with you. I'd take anything."

"I have a theory," he said, ignoring everything I had just said.

I ignored him now and wiped the blood that oozed from the cut off my arm.

"I think it was fate that I kidnapped you and her."

"I don't think it was fate. I think it was your crazy-ass mind."

He continued, unperturbed by my words. "I'm sure if I didn't kidnap you, I would've kidnapped some other kid. I then would have kidnapped Bella."

I stared at him through the mirror, and he was staring at a dark beer stain on his shirt.

"If it wasn't you that got taken, do you think whoever it was would've been as kind as you are to Bella?" he asked. "Even though I hate that you're so kind to her," he seethed.

I began stitching my wound, waiting for him to continue. Stitching my wounds was something I had taught myself how to do. It was an essential part of living here. I winced as the skin was tugged by the thread.

So fucking gross.

"Would you want some other guy with her?"

I slammed my fist against the sink and it shook.

"No!" I roared. "I'd rather you not hurt anyone's lives! Leave everyone the fuck alone!"

He pursed his lips, then whispered, "No."

I turned to him again, my eyes in slits. "Why. The. Fuck. Not?"

"I just can't."

"Well I just can't let you do this anymore. Let her go home, James," I ordered.

"No, it's too late now. I'll go to jail." He smirked at me. "And so will you."

My eyes widened. "Why would I go to jail? I didn't do anything."

He shook his head. "Doesn't matter, kid. You're turning eighteen next week. You know what that means?"

I shook my head.

"It means you're an adult, and you're not a minor. They may have let you slide on this before, but not now. You're a teenage boy with a record, living with me. Why would they believe you?"

I shook my head in disbelief. "Bella would explain-"

"Why would they believe her? She's been missing for three days. They'd think she's gone mental." He stood from the tub and stood in front of me. "You're in the same predicament as me now, kid. Whatever happens to me, happens to you."

I clenched my fists angrily.

"So you set her free, and your freedom is down the drain. Do you want that?"

I stared at the cracked, dirt covered tile.

He was right. I wasn't going to be a kid anymore. It was either set Bella free and I went to jail, or let her stay selfishly, and let her continue to get beaten.

"You choose," he whispered, then walked from the room.


	8. Flightless Bird

Chapter 8

Edward POV

I stayed, just like I said I would. I sat across from Bella's sleeping form, watching out for her. I felt like it was my job to watch out for her, then the guilt I had wanted James to feel had been thrust into me for the hundredth time this night. How ironic that I had been the one trying to make him feel guilty, and it turned out he made me feel this way. It pissed me off.

I didn't sleep, like usual. I just sat there, watching Bella as she muttered stuff in her sleep and rolled around restlessly, the whole time guilt ate me alive.

She wasn't healthy here. This definitely wasn't a healthy environment. Who was I to take away her normal life for this life? This was the life I loathed. If I really liked Bella, wouldn't I let her leave?

Bella POV

I stretched around in a warm pair of arms, and smiled when I realized who it was.

"Hi, Edward," I murmured as I rubbed my eyes.

When I looked up at him, his face was emotionless, icy. He tightened his grip of his arms around me.

"Hi," he replied emotionlessly.

My eyebrows furrowed. What was wrong with him?

"Edward, what's-"

"Lets' go out," he interrupted. "James went to work already, so let's go."

I raised an eyebrow and asked, "Where?"

He smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes, giving him laugh lines like it usually did.

Something was off…

"I'll finally teach you how to ride a bike," he said while standing.

"O…kay?"

He pulled me up the stairs, throwing a pop tart at me as we went outside. I caught it reflexively and stood on the two steps in front of his house, watching as he pulled the bike upright.

"Ready?" he asked.

I took a big bite of the strawberry poptart and moaned in contentment.

Food was good.

I looked around and noticed a lot of things. I didn't know what day it was, but I was pretty sure it was still October. The trees were bare, the once vibrant oranges, yellows and reds gone. All the leaves were in giant piles on the ground, but it wasn't just the dead looking trees. It was the color of the dead leaves. They were white, grayish sort of. They truly were dead. The white and gray leaves coated the ground. They were motionless on the ground. The usually cold air was gone. The usually warm sun was gone. Everything was like a picture - lifelike, but nothing like how it was supposed to feel. I couldn't feel the cold air biting at my exposed skin, and I couldn't feel the sun beating on the top of my head. It worried me, and it was also just silent. There were no sounds of distant cars, no birds chirping, yet there were tons of them flying high in the sky.

This all fit how Edward was acting. Lifeless, detached. The atmosphere was suffocating, and I didn't like it. Edward was different, and I didn't know why.

"Umm, yeah," I muttered, stuffing the rest of the poptart into my mouth like a pig. "I'm ready."

He gave a small smile, and it made my heart sink in displeasure.

I sat down on the bike, staring down at the handles.

"Edward?" I whispered.

"Yeah?"

"What's wrong?" I asked, my cheeks heating.

"Nothings wrong," he said robotically. "Couldn't be better."

I looked up at him, and he had that fake smile again.

"Ready to learn?" he asked, putting his hands over mine.

I nodded. "Yeah," I sighed.

I fell a lot, but I never touched the ground. Edward wouldn't allow that. He had promised I wouldn't plummet to the ground, and he had kept his promise.

After I learned how to ride a bike - like a four year old - we went inside. We ate and talked, but he wasn't himself. He wasn't joking, or cursing, and…he didn't kiss me.

_That _bothered me the most.

He snuggled up next to me that night, rubbing circles on my arm as we sat in silence.

"Edward?" I whispered.

"Yeah?"

"You like me…right?" I bit my lip. Maybe that was why he had started acting like this. Maybe he had hated when we kissed, and now regretted it. Maybe he _didn't_ like me.

"Why the hell wouldn't I?" he asked, snorting.

I was happy to see the him I liked back a little bit, even if it wasn't fully.

I shrugged. "You're acting different."

He furrowed his brows, staring at his legs. "I…guess I'm just tired," he said.

I nodded, not buying what he was selling one bit.

Something was up.

Ten days. Yeah, that's right, I counted. Ten days of lifeless Edward, mom-like peck kisses, and no cursing.

I was bitter because he wasn't the Edward I liked. I was sad because I missed him. I was annoyed because I knew he was keeping something from me.

Ten days of waiting for the inevitable. I knew something bad was going to happen. I knew the night I woke up to find Edward standing in the living room, muttering swiftly into a phone…

"Noah?" I whispered groggily, standing at the top of the steps. When I woke up in the middle of the night and he wasn't there, I freaked out. Yeah, I was kind of clingy.

He quickly hung up the phone and turned to me. "What?" he whispered.

"W-what are you doing?" I asked.

"Nothing," he sighed. He took my hand and led me back downstairs. "Come on, let's sleep."

He was acting weird. He had been acting like a robot ever since the first time we kissed.

Tonight James was gone. It was just Edward and me He wouldn't be back for awhile. We were sitting on the couch, watching TV. Then, something on TV caught my eye.

"Isabella Swan, who has been missing for a month now, has maybe been found."A picture of me popped onto the TV as the woman's voice went on. "Her parents got a phone-"

Edward turned the TV off abruptly, throwing the remote across the room.

"Edward, tell me what's going on!" I yelled, standing up.

He stared at the floor, still sitting.

"Why are you acting like this?!"

He stood up, yanking me into the bathroom.

"You need to take a shower," he said in a monotone.

I let him drag me, but my anger just continued to boil.

"Edward, I'm getting really-"

"What did you want to do when you grew up - I mean, before you came here?" he asked, turning on the water.

Such a random question.

"Why?" I asked.

"I want to know," he whispered, turning back to me.

"I wanted to be a teacher," I answered.

He smiled softly. "You'd be good at it," he said mostly to himself.

I watched as the steam flitted up above our heads, and I started to get hot.

"Edward, can't you talk to me?" I asked quietly.

He shook his head.

"Why?" I moaned.

He stepped closer to me, our chests touching.

"Can I tell you something?" he asked.

I nodded, hoping he'd explain something to me. He had been leaving me in the dark for too long.

"I love you," he whispered, shoving his head in the crook of my neck.

I tangled my fingers in his hair, my eyes wide at his confession. I could feel my heart swelling, now getting bigger to make room for Edward's love. His face was still shoved in the crook of my neck. His breath was blowing against my neck, sending pleasurable shivers through my body.

"I love you, too," I whispered.

He brought his face back up. His eyes were red around the rims, and they were glassy. He was…crying? Why?

"Edward-"

He pulled his shirt over his head, revealing his beautiful chest to me for the second time. I gaped at him, and he slid his hands down my stomach to the hem of my shirt. He left his hands around it, staring at me, asking for permission.

I nodded, gulping.

He pulled the same shirt I had been wearing for over a month now over my head and threw it carelessly across the room. He took the rest of his clothes off except for his boxers, and I stood there, ogling him like a pervert.

I let him slide my jeans off, my eyes nearly going to the back of my head. Once everything except my underwear and bra was off, I followed him nervously into the shower. I stared up at him, watching as the warm water pelted his back, spraying off in different directions.

He pulled me into his arms, and I rested my head against his chest.

"I'm sorry," he whispered into my hair.

I looked up at him. "For what?"

"For everything."

I rubbed his cheek.

"I should have made you leave. I'm stupid."

I shook my head. "You're not."

He leaned in to kiss me again, and it was finally a genuine kiss. I wrapped my arms around his neck, happy for the first time in too long.

"I love you," he said again.

I said it back, and he began kissing me again.

"God, I hate myself," he said in a strangled voice.

"Why?" Why was the only thing coming from my mouth.

He shook his head. "This is wrong," he whispered. "I'm eighteen now."

I nodded. "I know. You told me."

"So this," he gestured at the two of us, "is illegal."

I didn't say anything, because he'd probably get mad if I said I didn't care - which I didn't. I didn't know what else to do, so I just hungrily yanked his face to mine. He kissed me back with more fervor than I had expected. His lips were hot and wet, just like the setting we were in. He lifted me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist. He pushed me against the wall, kissing down my jaw and neck, then back up again.

"I want you to be happy," he breathed across my neck. His breath was cold compared to the water crashing down on us.

"I am," I breathed back.

He looked pained. "I know," he said in a strangled, almost inaudible voice.

* * *

**No they didn't have sex :P just to clear it up.**

**REVIEWS MAKE EDWARD YANK YOU INTO A HOT SHOWER ;)**


	9. I See Right Through You

Chapter 9

Edward woke me up late in the night. I opened my eyes, not really comprehending what was going on.

"Edward, what's going on?" I mumbled while rubbing my face.

He lifted me from the floor, looking around the moonlit basement.

"Come outside," he said.

"Why?"

"Just do it," he hissed. He piled crates above the little window, then shoved it open. He went out before me, then helped me out. He grabbed my hand then started walking to the back of his house, pulling me behind a bush.

"Umm…why are we behind a bush?" I asked.

He shut his eyes, throwing his head back to lean against the tree he was sitting next to. "We're waiting," he whispered.

I raised an eyebrow, sitting Indian style across from him.

"For what?"

"More like who," he responded quietly, but not quiet enough for me to not hear him.

"What do you mean?" My voice was getting higher pitched. My breathing sped up, and I instantly knew what he meant. The secret phone calls, the news cast about me being "found". Tears slid down my cheeks, but he didn't look at me. "You told them!" I yelled. "You turned yourself in!"

He was silent.

"No!" I screamed, standing up.

He finally met my gaze. There were tears in his eyes, too.

"Don't make this harder," he said between clenched teeth. "I had to make a choice - between what's right and what's not!"

I glared at him, tears going down my cheeks in fresh, hot torrents.

"Did you ever stop to think what I wanted?! What about my choice?!"

He sighed loudly, pulling at his hair. "Your choice is the wrong choice."

"No it isn't! I thought you loved me!"

He stood up, towering over me. "I _do_ love you," he growled. "Which is why I can't let you do this!" he screamed. "Your ruining your life! What, you just want to live with me in a basement forever?!"

I started gasping for breath as the sound of sirens came closer.

"That's not a fucking life!"

They were really close now.

"Edward, don't do this," I begged.

He shook his head. "I have to," he whispered, yanking me from behind the bush and coming to a stop once the police cars stopped hastily in front of us.

The blue and red lights glowed across our faces, blinding us.

"Let her go!" a cop shouted from behind a police car, holding a gun. "Or we'll shoot."

He let go of me, and I felt like I had just been slapped across the face.

"No, no, no…" I whispered as Edward took a step away from me. "Edward, please." I was sobbing now.

A woman grabbed me away from him as a cop pulled his arms behind his back, cuffing him.

"Edward!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.

I saw James being yanked violently from the house. He struggled in the cops' grasp, trying to get away.

Edward didn't even try. He just walked with the police into the car, staring at the ground.

People came out of their homes, talking and gasping surrounding me as my heart started thudding behind my ears. I swear I could even hear the sound of blood rushing through my veins.

I couldn't breath. It seemed like this woman, rubbing my back saying, "It will be all right. He can't hurt you now," was choking me. I wouldn't be all right! Edward never even hurt me! My heart felt heavy as I tried to stop the world from spinning. I realized with a sick sneer that my parents weren't even here. The woman pulled me into a cop car. She sat next to me in the backseat, rubbing my arms, reassuring me that everything was going to be "okay".

I hissed at her and her eyes widened.

She finally let me go, so I eagerly slid over to the window, watching as our car drove away from the one carrying my life to rot in jail.

We came to my house - my big, cavernous house. It was so unwelcoming. It felt like it wasn't my home anymore. This wasn't where I belonged. I belonged with Edward.

My heart clenched painfully as the woman led me up the grand porch to my front door.

"You're safe now," she murmured again.

I stared at her as if she was crazy. My eyes were wide, my mouth hung open.

I lost it.

My hand swiped painfully across her cheek. I watched as she staggered backwards, then fell down the porch steps. She was a heavy woman, and she landed with an audible thud on the concrete.

My fists were clenched, my teeth were barred.

"I _was _safe," I spat acidly. "Where's, Edward?! I want Edward!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.

The front door opened, and my mom stood there in a party dress. I could see behind her a ton of other people from my father and my mother's jobs. They were all wearing long dresses and suits, eating finger foods and drinking champagne.

"Oh, Bella!" she laughed, handing one of the caterer's employees her wine glass. "They got you!"

I pushed past her, shielding my tear streaked face as I ran up the big staircase to my room. I entered my all pink room that I hated, slamming the front door loudly. It echoed throughout the room, and the sound annoyed the hell out of me.

I began ripping apart everything my hands landed on. I was mad, I was angry, I was furious, I was livid. I was every word that described mad in the English dictionary. I finally faltered with a tear filled sob. I fell to the ground, clutching my face in my hands. I curled in a ball on the floor, tears streaming onto the pure white carpet. I rolled up in a ball, crying.

I wanted to lose all the tears my body was able to shed so that I might be able to never shed a single tear again. My body shook, my eyes stung. My whole body stung in numbness. I was numb without Edward.

_The only way to get back to life, was to get back to Edward_, I decided. Because right now, I wasn't alive.

So I lay on the floor of my room. It was dark. I was consumed in my pain. I was consumed in the thoughts and visions that haunted me of Edward in prison. I stared at the broken pieces of glass that I lay on, watching as they slowly cut into my skin, blood pooling everywhere.

I was numb; I didn't feel it.

Edward POV

They put me in a cell with James and two other very big, creepy looking men. I sat on the ground of my jail cell, staring at the moon through the little window guarded by more bars.

Bella hated me. My stomach twisted painfully as I thought of how she must've hated me. I broke my promise to her. I left her. I left my life. She said she hated her family, and that her parents never gave her a second glance.

I left Bella.

Pain poured across my face as I pictured Bella's face as the woman pulled her forcefully to the police car as she struggled in her arms. She tried to get to me, and I just stood there and let the police cuff me.

I could feel tears stinging my eyes, and I felt like a loser. Men weren't supposed to cry, but maybe I lost every human moral I was supposed to live by when I left. I let them take me to jail to help ensure that Bella could be with a man who could give her everything I couldn't - which was a lot. I couldn't even give her a big house like the one she had before James took her.

James stood from the corner of the cell where he was sitting, glaring daggers at my lifeless face. He stood over me, his nostrils flaring.

"You fucking asshole!" he screeched.

I just stared up at him, not caring about what he did to me. I could fight back and beat him up. There was no one to worry about protecting anymore…

"Why the hell would you-"

I punched him square in the face. He flew away from me, landing against the jail bars with an extremely loud crack. Blood poured from his lips.

"Edward," he hissed in a deadly voice. "You really shouldn't have done that."

I smirked. "I'm actually glad I did it."

He growled, then lunged for me.

I didn't know if it was the anger and sadness mixed with the rage I felt about this whole day, but I kicked James' ass.

My arm smacked out in front of his face as he crashed into it, landing on the floor on his back. I leaned down and picked him up, then threw him across the jail cell.

The two guys in the corner of the room laughed loudly, their bellowing chuckles ringing through the room, and it irritated me.

"Shut the fuck up!" I growled, my eyes wide with annoyance.

James was still on the ground as the two other guys - huge, by the way - stood in front of me, cracking their knuckles.

"You sure you want to mess with us, kid?" one of the big men said in a very deep voice.

"I'm not a fucking kid," I screamed. I punched them both at the same time. They both flew backwards, landing right next to James. I panted heavily, my knuckles covered in blood. I slowly backed away then sat in the corner of the cell, watching as darkness consumed the room.

Red and black was the only thing I saw. My light was gone.

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	10. What I Wanted, What I Needed

Chapter 10

Bella POV

It felt like years, but it had only been hours that I lay on my bedroom floor, watching as red pooled around me. I was sort of freaked out when I couldn't even feel the broken glass stabbing into my skin, but I couldn't find the strength to move.

So I sat there.

"Bells?" It was my dad's voice. My dad was nice - nicer than my mom. He was the one who asked me how school was, or why I was upset. My mom was the one who forced me to shop with her, and talk to boys I didn't want to talk to. The door slowly creaked open, and I covered my face from the light pooling in from the hallway. "Bella, what the hell happened to you?!" he screamed, running over.

"Nothing, dad," I said in a raspy voice from crying and screaming.

"Why is your room destroyed? Why are you covered in _blood_?"

"Edward's gone," I whispered into his arm as he carried me to the bathroom.

"Edward?" he asked in a confused tone. "Who's Edward?"

I sighed. "You wouldn't understand." My voice shook, and I could feel tears coming again.

He sat me on the counter and began pulling pieces of glass from my little cuts on my arms and legs. It reminded me of when Edward had had the giant gash with glass in it, and my heart clenched one, painful tug.

"You look horrible," my dad observed, watching me with pursed lips.

I shrugged. "I _was _kidnapped. You and mom don't even seem to care," I hissed bitterly.

"A boy called us," dad began, "about three days ago."

My head snapped up, my eyes widening. "What did he tell you?"

"He told us you were safe, and that you'd be home soon - he'd make sure of it. Then he hung up."

I remembered Edward in the living room, holding the phone to his ear and whispering far too quickly for me to understand it.

"That was Edward," I mumbled, staring at the little pieces of glass as they clanked quietly into the garbage can.

"He took care of you?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

I nodded. "And I took care of him."

His brow furrowed. "What do you mean?" He began bandaging the little scratches.

"You wouldn't understand. You probably won't even believe me." I sighed.

"Try me," he said.

I stared at him for awhile. His face was smooth. He had a crease between his eyebrows that I got, too when I was stressed. I knew he was hiding his obvious curiosity. He wanted to know what happened to me.

"So, you want to know what happened to me?" I whispered as I hopped off the counter.

He nodded.

So I told him about Edward, and how I loved him.

Edward POV

Today, I felt happy. It wasn't because I was fed decent food. No. It was because today, the Swans were coming to a questioning, and Bella was going to be asked questions, and so was I. We were going to be in different rooms, Bella, James and I, but it was just the thought that she was in the same building.

I was wearing a fucking orange jumper - very cliché - sitting in a chair in an all grey room, with a big, white light staring down at me.

"So…" one of the investigators began. "James is your father?" he asked.

I shook my head. "Fuck no."

"Language," the man scolded.

"Do you think I give a shit?" I asked, tilting my head to the side.

"No," he said, "I don't think that."

"Good, because I don't." I smiled.

He rolled his eyes then sat across from me. "Then what is James Cullen to you?"

"A murderer," I said.

"Why would you say that? He didn't murder Isabella Swan."

I closed my eyes, my jaw taught.

"Can you not call her that?" I hissed between clenched teeth.

"That's her name, Edward," he said.

"Just call her Bella."

"Why?"

"Because, calling Isabella is so…formal. She wouldn't like it."

He just stared at me, a little dumbfounded.

"Okay then," he mumbled. "So you said James Cullen is a murderer. Why?"

"He killed my parents," I stated.

"When was this?" he asked, actually looking intrigued.

"When I was twelve. So, about six years ago."

"If James isn't really your father, why do you use his last name?"

I shrugged. "He told me to."

"Then what is your last name, really?"

"Masen."

He nodded, and wrote on his paper.

I rolled my eyes. What the fuck was this? Therapy?

"So tell me," he began, "what happened with you and _Bella_?" He accentuated her name.

I sighed. "I was home and James left. He didn't tell me where he was going, he just left. He came back with Bella. Whenever James went out, I'd watch her, and we began talking. We became friends, then…more." I felt like covering my face with a paper bag. Why should this guy get to know about our private life?

"So you became like…lovers?" he asked.

"Yeah, I guess so."

"Then why did you turn yourself in if you were innocent?" he asked confusedly.

"Because no one would believe me, and Bella deserves someone better."

He was silent for awhile, and I felt like screaming. I was fucking embarrassed.

"That will be all," he said quietly.

Two cops came in and took me, bringing me back to my cell.

Bella POV

I sat, staring out my window. Kids passed by happily, running as the colorful leaves fell around them. However, I sat there, waiting. For what? I have no idea.

"Bella?" my dad's voice called through the door.

I didn't turn away from the window. I figured, maybe watching other people live their lives would help me live mine. So far it wasn't working.

The door creaked open, and I heard a sigh.

"Bella, it's time to go," he said.

I didn't move my eyes from the little girl walking. She had long, curly blonde hair. She was six, maybe five. She skipped down the sidewalk happily, her mother behind her laughing as she watched her throw leaves up into the air.

"Where," I said, not really in a questionable tone.

"To the jail."

I slowly turned. "Do I get to see him?" Some life came back into my voice.

He switched from foot to foot. "Only if you want."

I nodded, standing from my chair. "I do," I said strongly. "I want to see him."

He held his hand out and I took it.

"You know what you have to do, right?" he asked.

"Yes." I nodded. "I'll tell them what happened with Edward and me."

He nodded, too. "If you want this boy out of jail, honey, you have to do this."

"I know."

It was a quick drive down to the jail. There wasn't really any cars in the parking lot. It was just my dad and me, walking into the warm office. My mom hadn't come, and I wasn't really surprised.

We hung our winter coats on the hooks by the door to the Forks Police Station and stood by the Chiefs desk awkwardly. My dad had been chief when he was younger, but then when he met my mom, he had gone into criminal law - basically a lawyer for all the creeps out there doing bad things. God knows why my dad would want to do _that._

"Uh, Chief?" my dad said, trying to get his attention.

He looked up from his papers.

He was old, maybe early 60's or late 50's. He had grey hair with streaks of black in it, and a grey moustache.

"Hey, Charlie," he said to my dad.

My dad nodded.

The chief looked at me. "How are you, Isabella?"

"Fine," I responded curtly.

"We're here for the questioning," my father said, trying to change the subject away from my bad attitude.

Well, I was pissed. I had a right to talk to the cops in mad tones. They did take Edward, after all.

"All right, Isabella," he said, standing up from his chair. "This way." He motioned for me to follow him.

"See you later, dad," I said as I followed Chief Rogers down the hallway.

He opened a metal door, allowing me to go through.

The room was all grey with one big, bright light hanging over a table with two chairs. There was a window that I knew cops were watching us through, but I couldn't see them.

"Take a seat, Isabella," Chief Rogers said.

"Just Bella," I said, annoyed.

"Hmm," he huffed.

"What?"

"That's what the boy said to call you," he mumbled as he sat across from me.

He meant Edward.

A smile twitched at the corners of my lips.

"All right," he said, taking out a notebook. "So tell me how this all started."

"I was walking home on the path by the woods - you know on Franklin Street?" I asked.

He nodded.

"Then James Cullen came and took me and brought me to his home."

"Edward told me he had to watch you. Is that true?"

I nodded.

"He also said you were friends, then turned into something…more."

I felt heat creeping up to my cheeks.

"Yeah, that's true." I bit my lip.

"Does that mean you love him?" he asked.

I stared at my hands embarrassedly.

Dad had said if I wanted Edward back, I had to tell them about Edward and me. So that's what I would do.

"Yes. He loves me and I love him."

He stared at me for awhile.

"What?" I asked, annoyed.

"Didn't he hurt you? How could you love _him_?"

My eyes went into slits.

"I love Edward because he protected me from getting killed. He risked his life to keep me safe. When James tried to starve me Edward gave me food. When James tried to rape me, Edward stopped him." I took a deep breath, holding back the tears. "He turned himself in so I could be safe." I glared at him furiously. "This is why I love him, you asshole."

His eyes were wide. "You've changed, Bella," he whispered.

"Sometimes change is good," I hissed.

"And sometimes it's not," he shot back.

"Well, in this case, it sure as hell is. I'm tired of letting people walk all over me."

He gulped at my expression.

If only looks could kill…

"That's all I need, I suppose," he muttered, clearing his throat.

"Can I see him now?" I asked.

"Sure, I'll bring him h-"

"No," I said, cutting him off. "I want to see him privately, without them-" I pointed to the window, "watching."

He held his hand on the door handle, contemplating.

"Fine," he finally said. "Come with me."

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**Sorry people to make James' last name be Cullen lol :P it's just how it all worked out, and carlisles not in this so....deal with it :)**

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	11. He Ate My Heart

**Oh shoot, I'm sorry guys! Someone told me that it said Frank and Noah, for some chapters. I'm really sorry. The reason for that is because this story was just one of mine, my own characters and stuff. Edward used to be Noah and James used to be Frank and Bella used to be Milly. I just decided to change it to a fanfic for the heck of it. So sorry if I missed the names when I was changing the chapter. Just ignore it. Anyways, here you go :)**

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Chapter 11

Bella POV

I sat in a plain room, waiting for Edward. There were so many emotions running through me right now. Anger, love, lust, hate. I didn't know which one to choose.

"She's in here," I heard the chief say from behind the door.

I stood up, my eyes wide as the door slowly opened.

Edward POV

"She's in here," Chief Rogers said.

I nodded eagerly as he un-cuffed me.

He pushed the door open, and there, standing in all her beauty, was Bella.

"I'll leave you guys alone," he said, shutting the door behind me.

I raked my eyes over her, a big, idiotic grin on my face as I looked at her.

She was healthy, but I did see a ton of scratches on her arms and legs that she didn't have when she left. Her hair was clean and shiny, her clothes were fresh with no blood and dirt stains, but she didn't look happy. She just stared at me.

I wanted to take a step forward, and hug her and kiss her, but the expression on her face stopped me.

"Hi," I whispered.

"Hi."

We both stood on opposite ends of the room awkwardly. I could almost hear crickets chirping.

"You look pretty," I whispered uncontrollably.

I saw a blush color her cheek, and I smiled wider.

She sighed loudly, then ran over to me, stopping short in front of me.

I stared down at her.

Then - I wasn't expecting _this _at all - she slapped me. Her hand smacked painfully across my cheek so hard that it made my head turn to the side. I almost lost my balance.

Huh, for a girl she could hit.

I lifted my hand to my cheek as the stinging burned it.

"You idiot," she whispered.

I just stared at her, dumbfounded.

"Are you happy now?" she asked, tears running down her cheeks.

"Uh, no," I said, my cheek still stinging. "That hurt like hell."

She groaned. "It's not funny!"

"I'm sorry," I said, trying to pull her to me, but she pulled away.

That hurt more than the fucking slap.

"You should be sorry," she said, crying.

"I had to do it, though, Bella," I whispered.

"Couldn't you have warned me?!" she yelled.

"Then you wouldn't have let me do it," I said.

She opened her mouth, then closed it, then opened it again and said, "So?!"

I rolled my eyes.

"I'm sorry," I said again, staring her in the eyes. "I…you couldn't stay with me. Not like that." I reached out hesitantly and wiped the tears from under her eyes. Thank God she let me.

"I'm sorry, too," she whispered.

"For what?" I asked.

"For slapping you."

I laughed. "It's okay. It hurt a lot, though. You're really good at slapping people."

She laughed, then wrapped her arms around my waist.

I pulled her to me tightly, resting my cheek on the top of her head.

"I missed you," she whispered.

I smiled. "I missed you, too."

She looked up at me, and I could tell what she wanted by _that _look.

I grinned, then brought my lips to hers.

It felt like a chorus of angels should have started singing. Kissing Bella had to be like going to Heaven.

She pulled back. "Are they going to let you out?" she asked.

I hesitated. "I…don't know."

She started crying again, so I just pulled her into my arms, sinking slowly to the floor. My back was to the door as I held her in my arms, and let her cry. I felt like crying, too, but no way was I going to cry in front of her…again.

I was such a girl.

* * *

"Is it bad here?" Bella asked as she played with my hair.

I shrugged. "At least I get to eat good food."

She grimaced.

"Yeah," I sighed, "but it's nothing like that pizza."

She laughed. "Maybe I could bring you some," she murmured to herself.

"They probably won't let you," I said.

She frowned, then sat back in my lap, resting her head on my shoulder.

"I told my dad, you know," she said quietly.

I looked down at her, and she was biting her lip.

"What do you mean?"

"I told him about _us_." She accentuated the "us".

"Oh," I said lamely.

In my mind I began making images of her dad beating the shit out of me for being with his daughter. Hey, I couldn't blame him. If I was him, I wouldn't want Bella with some guy who lived with a psychopath, and was now in jail.

"And he's okay with it," she said, smiling.

I furrowed my brow. "You're dad must be taking some kind of happy pills," I said.

She laughed. "He's…different," she explained. "Before I was kidnapped, he was never really there. But, ever since I got back, he's been nothing but understanding." She said in a lower voice, "It's kind of freaking me out, I have to admit."

I laughed. "Wow."

It was silent for awhile. She sat in my lap, twirling the endlessly growing hair in my eyes in her little fingers.

"Not my mom, though," she whispered.

I took a deep breath.

I figured, that must suck, having a shitty mom. My mom was always awesome. She deserved a little label attached to her grave that said: _Best Mom Ever. _However, Bella told me all about her mom. She never felt loved by her parents.

Now her dad was turning into a caring father, but…her mom was a bitch. Let's put it at that.

"What did she do when you came home?" I asked.

"Nothing," she said in a disgusted tone. "Even when my dad told her about my cut-" She stopped abruptly. "Uh, never mind."

My eyes went into slits.

Her cut? Her cuts!

"Your cuts," I said in a hard voice. I grabbed her arm and held it in front of her. "You mean these?" I asked through clenched teeth.

She was silent, so I took that as a yes.

I stood up, staring down at her with angry eyes.

She sat Indian style, not looking at me.

"Where'd you get the cuts from?" I demanded.

She was silent.

"We're supposed to tell each other everything. Just fucking tell me."

She bit her lip, a blush coloring her cheek.

She was…embarrassed? Why in fuck's name would she be embarrassed about _cuts_?

"You're embarrassed," I stated.

She nodded.

"Why?"

She stood, then walked over to the chairs in the corner of the room.

"Because, the way I got them was pathetic," she mumbled, staring at her hands.

I sat across from her. "What did you fall into a bush again, or something?"

She laughed, then said, "No."

"Then what?"

"I…was lying in a pile of glass," she said quickly, but not quick enough for me to not hear her.

"Umm…why?" I asked, a little disturbed.

She groaned, covering her face with her hands.

"I was depressed, Noah! You don't get how much that hurt, do you?" she asked.

"Please don't tell me you did that intentionally," I whispered.

She shook her head furiously. "I just didn't realize, I guess," she muttered. "It wasn't intentional, though. I swear."

I nodded, then grabbed her hands in mine.

"Will I ever be able to make it up to you?" I asked.

She stared at our entwined hands.

"Yes, you will."

"How?"

"Be here for me. Forever."

Bella POV

My dad and I left after a long while. My mom was in her office when we got back, doing "work things".

I went into the shower, wincing as the water made my cuts sting. After my shower I just lay in my bed, staring up at the ceiling.

Edward and I were fine. Tomorrow was the court hearing where they'd decide the fates for both James and Edward. I'd find out if Edward was going to jail, or if he was coming out. I hoped he was going to be let free.

And if he wasn't freed…then what would I do?


	12. White Demon

Chapter 12

I woke up to the sound of my mother and father yelling at each other.

_Such a wonderful thing to be woken up to_, I thought sourly.

I climbed out of bed, shivering as the cold, November air clung to my body. I scrambled awkwardly down the stairs, going past my yelling parents, and to the kitchen. I poured myself a bowl of cereal and orange juice, staring out the window into our backyard. The in ground pool was covered by a black cover, protecting the water from the cold air. All the once filled trees were now bare, naked.

My mom came into the kitchen, dressed in her dress suit. She grabbed the carton of orange juice and drank a chug from it, then grabbed her suitcase and started for the door.

"Mom!" I called, hopping down from my chair and going over to her.

She slowly turned, her back rigid. "Yes?" she sighed.

"You're going to work," I stated, staring at her work clothes.

"Yes…"

"You're not going to come to the hearing?" I asked, pissed.

"I can't, sweetie. I need to get a big client, and-"

"Save it for someone who cares," I hissed. I turned away from her, heading up to my room to get dressed.

I wanted to look presentable for the hearing. Oddly, I thought that maybe this would help me get Edward.

Stupid, I know.

I wore dark washed jeans and a white, frilly blouse that I wanted to rip apart. I brushed my hair that was getting more curls than was usual, then pulled my shoes on.

"Ready?" my dad asked as I descended the stairs.

I took a deep breath. "Yes."

Today would determine the rest of my life.

Edward POV

The jail cell gate slowly opened.

"Masen!" a cop yelled.

I groaned, flipping over in my cot to look at the cop standing in the gateway.

"It's time."

I took a deep breath, following him out of the cell, and down the hall to the cop car that would take me to the court. It was freezing outside, but these assholes wouldn't let me have a jacket. I sat in the car, as far away from James as possible. He was coming, too. He sat on the other side of the seat, staring out the window, oddly at ease.

"Nervous?" Chief Rogers asked as we turned into the parking lot of the court.

I was. I could feel the blood rushing through my veins, my heart thundering in my chest. Also, the chief and I had become pretty good friends. He was a nice guy, but that didn't mean I didn't want to snap his neck when he came in yesterday and told Bella she had to go.

Yeah, I was very violent. Shut the hell up and deal with it.

Chief Rogers held my arm as we walked into the court room. It was basically empty. However, I knew exactly who's brown hair that was in the front row.

Bella turned when the court doors banged shut, her chocolate eyes wide. She smiled at me, and waved.

I smiled back.

I saw Bella's father for the first time. He looked a lot like her. Same shape eyes, and same color and texture hair. He looked at me, too, and…smiled. Well, Bella did tell him about us, so I guess she told him about how I protected her from being fucking raped, starved and murdered.

"Can everyone please take their seats?" the judge said in a booming voice.

Chief Rogers nodded. He and another cop took James and me over to the table in the front row, a few feet away from Bella's.

"Now," the judge began, "let's get this over with. I have a wife at home waiting for me."

I took a deep breath.

"Mr. Cullen is charged with kidnapping and second degree murder."

I smiled.

This bastard is finally going to jail for murdering my parents.

"James Cullen kidnapped Edward Masen and Isabella Swan. He murdered Elizabeth and Edward Masen," the judge explained. "So, Mr. Cullen is now serving a life sentence to prison with no bail."

"Woo!" I yelled, clapping my hands.

Chief Rogers smacked the back of my head, and I grinned.

I turned to James and mouthed, "Bye, asshole."

The judge cleared his throat.

"Sorry," I laughed.

"Anyway!" the judge said loudly. "Edward Masen…"

Bella POV

"Edward Masen…" the judge murmured, his eyes skimming the paper he held in his hands.

My heart was beating loudly. I clutched my dad's hand for dear life. I was sure it would break soon if the judge didn't say anything soon.

"Edward Masen, you are charged with being an accomplice in this kidnapping, and you are sentenced to eight months in jail with no bail."

My heart sank. My stomach ached. My throat burned. The world disappeared, leaving Edward in the middle with a giant light shining on him.

Eight months. Eight months alone. Eight months of Edward sitting in jail for nothing.

_Eight months…_

I turned to Edward, and his mouth was hanging open.

"Dad?" I whispered frantically. "Do something!"

"What can I do, Bells?" he whispered back.

The courtroom was silent. There were no sounds except for a cough here and there. My dad couldn't do anything. Maybe I could…

"Objection!" I screamed like they did in those movies.

The judge rolled his eyes as he stood from his podium.

"There is nothing to object to," he said. "My decision is final." He walked out of the court, the sound of the door banging shut rang through my mind.

Two cops took James away, but they left Edward standing there.

"Umm, I thought you and Edward would like to say…goodbye," Chief Rogers explained.

My dad and the chief left the room, leaving Edward and I standing across from each other.

As soon as the door shut, I ran over to him, jumping into his waiting arms. I wrapped my arms and legs around him as he held me to him. I cried like a baby into his neck. He held me to him tightly. I could hear him taking in deep breaths of my hair, and I did the same to him. I needed to engrave the scent of him into my mind.

"It'll be okay," he whispered.

I shook my head. "Eight months!" I moaned. "What will I do for eight months?"

"The same thing you did before I came along," he said, smiling.

"That would be nothing."

He sighed and pulled me into his lap as he sat on one of the many benches.

"You'll write me, right?" I asked.

He nodded. "Everyday."

I kissed him fiercely, pulling his face as close to mine as it could go. I tangled my fingers in his unruly hair, sighing in pleasure at the feel of his lips against mine.

He pulled back, breathing heavily. "I love you," he whispered, our foreheads touching.

"I love you, too."

_1 week later_

It had been a week since the hearing, and today, I got my first letter from Edward.

I ran down the stairs, shoving past my mother, and running outside. It was freezing, but I didn't care. I needed to hear from him. Tomorrow I'd be starting school again, and I needed some good news. School wasn't going to make me happy, not even seeing Angela.

I wanted to see Edward.

I ripped the letter open as I went back up to my room, locking the door behind me. This past week, I've been spending my whole day inside my room, doing nothing else. I always left the light off, and I just sat on my bed all day, trying to understand why God would do this.

I flattened out the letter and began reading.

November 5, 2009

Dear Bella,

I've been thinking about you a lot. I have nothing else to do around here. All I fucking do is sit in my cell all day. I read once - yes in my girly romance novels - that being in prison can make you go crazy. Do you think I will?

Anyways, the food around here sucks. I'm really craving that pizza. By the way, I know you said you'd be bored without me there. I figured out a way to relieve your boredom. It's genius.

I am ordering you to go and buy every book I had in my room at James'. No matter what your mom says, you're getting them. If you don't, I'll be seriously pissed. Another thing I want you to do is quit your stupid piano lessons. You told me you hated them, so fucking quit. I used to play piano as a kid (before James took me), but I forgot how to play…or I still do. I haven't had the chance to try. Last thing I need you to do is do something you've always wanted to do. When I get out, I'll do it with you.

Love,

Edward

I smiled as I closed the letter.

I would do everything Edward said to do, because I was a pushover. I was scared my mom would get mad at me, but seriously, did I care? She let me down a ton of times, so now she'd be getting a serious helping of payback.

I pulled out a piece of paper and wrote my letter back to Edward.

Edward POV

"Hey, kid!" some guy yelled.

I groaned.

I hated how everyone called me "kid". I was a fucking adult for god sakes.

"What?" I asked, looking out through the steel bars.

"Letter." Some guy held it through the middle of the bars, and I eagerly grabbed it.

I ripped it open, letting the scraps of paper fall to the ground. I began reading Bella's reply.

November 7, 2009

Dear Edward,

No, Edward, you are not going crazy. I don't think you will. If you do, though, I'll be joining you, because I think I'm going crazy, too. Yes I will do all the stuff you want me to, don't worry. But, I think my mom will be really mad. Do I care? No.

School starts tomorrow. I'm nervous. Everyone's going to stare at me, and ask if I'm "okay". What should I tell them? I don't know what I'm going to do once I stop playing piano. I don't really want to do anything, but I will just because you want me to. Yes, I am a pushover.

My dad took me to the batting cages. Yeah, I'm not very good at sports, so sports are out for that. I hit myself in the head with the bat and had to go to the hospital. Ugh, I'm such a loser…

I have to go now. It's late and once again, I have school tomorrow. I miss you. Bye.

Love,

Bella

I laughed as the image of Bella smacking herself in the head with a bat filled my mind.

Ugh, I missed her.

Bella POV

It was November. The break ended, and my alarm clock kept on buzzing loudly and annoyingly in my right ear. It was time for school. Today was when hell started. Today everyone was going to be asking me if I was "okay", or what happened to me.

Even if I did tell anyone - which I wasn't going to - they wouldn't understand. No one was there with Edward and me. No one saw how caring and wonderful he was -except me. I knew Edward, the real him. I knew the him he kept hidden under his tough exterior.

Edward was protective, and strong. He was gorgeous and sweet. He was kind, but broken. Edward was everything I had always dreamed about, and never thought was real in a guy.

"Bella, time to get up for school!" my mom shouted from downstairs.

As if I didn't know. I _did _have an alarm clock, after all.

I smashed my fist down onto it, trudging into the bathroom to begin my once daily routine. I brushed my teeth and hair and washed my face, then headed back to my room. Once I was in my room I tried hiding all of my cuts from the glass incident, and from James.

I shivered.

I still had a shadow of a bruise under my eye, but it wasn't that noticeable. I then picked out my clothes that I no longer cared about. Actually, I never really cared for clothes. It wasn't really my style to be into all those girly things. I was always more of a tomboy, but that had been hidden by my mother's need to butter me up like a god damn doll.

I pulled on a long sleeved thermal shirt. It was plaid - blue and black. I grabbed some dark washed jeans, then yanked my black converse sneakers on. As I grabbed my backpack from the floor, I saw my homework from about a month ago. It felt strange to me now. Going to school was a distant past for me.

"Isabella Marie Swan, I swear, I'm going to leave without you if you don't hurry up!" my mom screamed from downstairs.

"I'm coming!" I screamed back.

I looked in the mirror. My cheeks were flushed, my brown hair was in soft curls. I looked nice, but inside, I was dead.

* * *

School is the worst invention ever made. Whoever created it needed some schooling for themselves.

As I walked up the hallway to my locker, I couldn't even pretend to ignore the whispers that surrounded me. Everyone was still the same.

_Come on, Bella, it's just a month, _I reminded myself. _Not that much has changed._

I yanked my locker open, thrusting my books in haphazardly. I wanted to go home. I wanted to visit Edward.

"Bella?" a male's voice said.

I turned to see Jacob Black standing next to me. I'd known him my whole life, all the way back to kindergarten. Yet, he felt like a stranger to me now.

"Uh, hi, Jake," I mumbled, returning my gaze back to the papers that were spilling from my locker.

"I heard you got kidnapped," Jake said.

My teeth gritted together. I let them, because if I didn't, a string of profanities would have erupted from my mouth like lava exploding from a volcano.

"Why are you here?" I asked as nicely as possible. I really didn't want to be bothered.

"I just wanted to know if you were okay. Some people were saying that some guy named Edward Cullen raped you, or something."

My eyes widened, a gasp escaped from my throat.

"Who told you that?" I hissed, my eyes in slits.

He backed away a little.

_Good._

"Uh, uh, Jessica Stanley," he stuttered, taken aback by my expression.

I shoved my books into my backpack, slamming my locker as I stormed into the lunchroom where I knew perfectly well Jessica would be sitting, boys surrounding her. I shoved the doors open. They banged back against the walls loudly. Everyone's heads snapped up. The cafeteria fell silent. They all watched as I furiously walked over to Jessica, where she was in fact sitting with about five guys.

_Slut._

"Jessica!" I called once I was in earshot.

She turned, flipping her ugly curled hair over her shoulder. She smirked.

Jessica and I had never gotten along. Even when we were little four year olds, I despised her. She stole my crayons, giving them to the boys so they would like her. From then on, it was declared we were to be mortal enemies.

_This _proved it.

"Oh, Bella, you're not dead. What a shame," she said in her nasally voice.

I bit back a growl, stepping closer to her. I could almost see the steam rising from the top of my head.

"So, I'm guessing you're the one spreading these lies?" I spat angrily.

She smiled, running her bony fingers down some guy's chest.

"If you mean about you and that pedophile, then yes. The only guy that would ever want you is a psychopath." She started laughing, as if it was funny. Hell no it wasn't. "It's kind of pathetic, actually."

"Too bad it's not true," I said sarcastically. "He's not a psycho. Oh, but you'd be a expert in determining who's a psycho, wouldn't you, Jess? Considering you just got released from the asylum your parents sent you to."

Her eyes went into slits. She hopped off the top of the cafeteria table. I realized she was wearing a black mini skirt. Any shorter and it would be going up her butt.

"Bella, you're just mad because the loser is in jail - where he belongs. He's probably happy he's there. Any guy would be. No guy wants you - not even a pathetic guy who's parents were slaughtered." She chuckled darkly again.

"You bitch," I hissed under my breath. I smacked my fist into her fake nose, and her stupid laughter got cut off by a nasally scream. I straddled her as she lay on the floor, blood pouring from her nose in big torrents.

"Get the hell off me, you freak!" she screamed, flailing her arms around uselessly.

I continued punching her repeatedly, tears running down my cheeks.

"Bella, Bella!" I heard Angela scream.

Someone's arms wrapped around my small waist, tugging me off Jessica.

"What is going on in here?!" Principal Steward demanded.

I looked down at my knuckles and they were sheathed in Jessica's red blood. I wiped my hand across my shirt, looking at my feet embarrassedly. I could feel everyone staring at me, laughs and whispers filling the room as my face turned red.

"Isabella Swan," Principal Steward said, shocked.

I looked up, biting my lip.

"Did you do this to Jessica?" he asked, his eyes wide.

I looked over to Jessica, suppressing a smirk. Her nose, mouth and chin were covered in dry blood. Her hair was a mess, and her clothes had blotches of blood all over them.

_The bitch deserved it, _I hissed mentally.

I cleared my throat, shifting from foot to foot. I was nervous because I was never one of those girls who got sent to the office like it was nothing. I was one of the girls who feared being sent to the office, and would beg for forgiveness if that had ever happened. However, she had said bad, untrue things about Edward. When it came to Edward, I was willing to drop the scared, little girl shield I usually wore. Right now, I was vigorous.

"Yes," I said, taking a deep breath, "I did that."

Principal Steward's eyes widened even more, his mouth hanging open.

"Well, Isabella, this isn't like you at all," he said.

"She deserved it," I said in a strong voice. "Spreading lies usually is bad, isn't it?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

He nodded. "Yes, but so is violence."

_Oh, shoot._

"I'm going to have to take you to my office," he said. "We need to have a talk."

I groaned.

Principal Steward guided me down the halls, and to his office. The crowded halls were silent, much like the cafeteria. Every eye was on me. My eyes were now focusing extremely well on my shoes. I didn't dare look up.

Principal Steward sat in his chair once we reached his office, sighing.

"First, I wanted to know if you were all-"

I cut him off, "Stop." I held up a hand, closing my eyes. "I don't want anyone to ask me that. _Ever_ again."

He nodded, looking flustered. "So why would you hit Jessica Stanley?" He tilted his head to the side.

"She was spreading lies about Edward."

"Who?" he asked.

I rolled my eyes.

I knew that he knew. He just didn't want to say anything, trying to act all polite. Yeah, well, it was annoying as hell. The story was number one on the news stands. Of course it would be. This was such a small town, new, "thrilling" stories went off the racks like chocolate bars at _Weight Watchers _meetings.

"You know who he is," I whispered. I stared down at my hands that were lying limply in my lap. "D-don't make me explain it…again." I didn't like talking about Edward. It would just spark the pain that was searing painfully in my chest.

"Okay then," he sighed. He sat back in his chair. "I know you've been through a lot," he whispered. "So…I'll let this slide."

My eyes brightened as I looked back up at him.

"Really? You will?"

"Yes, but if this ever happens again, I promise you, I won't be so lenient."

I smiled, jumping up from my seat. "Thank you, sir."

"Go to class," he said, motioning to the door.

"Okay."

I walked into my classroom. There was a blush on my cheeks. I wanted to go home and curl up in a ball. Jessica was the most popular girl in school. I was…not. I was like those girls who were just _there. _I was a wallflower.

I pushed the door open to my first class. Everyone's heads snapped up. They all glared viciously.

"Hello, Miss Swan," Mr. Banner greeted.

I nodded.

"Take a seat wherever," he said, turning back to the board.

So I sat in the middle of the whole classroom - the only seat left, of course. Everyone's eyes were on a mission to glare a burning whole into every inch of my body, and it was working. I ignored the pelts of paper as they smacked into my back and arms. I ignored the girls saying they'd "take me down" after school. I ignored it all, focusing on the image of Edward, smiling jovially as he sat on the rock under the willow tree.


	13. Hearing Damage

Chapter 13

Edward POV

So jail sucks. Those freaks that say it's better than living on the street, are morons. It was _not _better than living on the street. Instead of sitting here, staring at the cracked concrete wall, I could be with Bella. But no, I was here.

Well, maybe to homeless criminals who came here and had no one waiting for them outside of this place might like it, but I _did _have someone out there. And she was alone.

Fuck my life.

"Edward, come on," my sort of friend said.

Okay, I got a friend. Sort of…. I know it's weird, having a friend who's an actual criminal, but if I didn't talk to someone, I'd go fucking crazy. Jasper robbed a bank and got caught, so now he was here. I guess robbing a bank wasn't _so _bad.

A cop opened my cell, the bars making an ugly, grating sound. It pierced my ears.

"What now, Jasper?" I sighed, walking next to the cop where Jasper was standing with his.

"I'm going to the gym they built in here. Got to keep my stamina up, you know?"

"Yeah," I agreed.

I guess I could hang out in the gym for awhile. It wasn't like I had anything else to do with my life at the moment.

The gym walls were all concrete - what wasn't concrete here? Nothing, that's what. There were punching bags and weights. Seriously, I thought cops were supposed to be smart. Why would they want _criminals _exercising? Yes, cops, we all want murderers and rapists to get _stronger_.

Jasper started punching at the big, red punching bag.

"So, I know your story," he said in-between punches. "_Everyone _does. It's the newest crime this town has seen in awhile."

"Yeah, so?" I asked through gritted teeth as I smacked the crap out of the bag.

"But you don't know _my _story."

"Yes I do," I said, wiping my forehead. "You robbed a bank."

He laughed, shaking his head. "Dude, crimes are more complex than that. Cops just want you to believe we're all psychos, but we're not. Sometimes, crimes are done in passion."

I laughed. "Passion? How could committing murders and raping and robbing be _passion_?"

"Exactly," he muttered. "You don't know the full story."

I sighed, rolling my eyes.

"Fine, Jazz." I sat on a bench, motioning for him to sit across from me. "Tell me your entire story."

He sat back.

I was guessing this was going to be a long story…

"Jasper, is this going to take long? I need to get to the cafeteria later to eat. I'm starving."

He rolled his eyes. "It won't take up your precious eating time, you obese fucker."

I grinned.

"So, two years ago, my daughter, Anna was diagnosed with leukemia," he started nonchalantly.

My eyes widened.

That must have been fucking horrible.

"I'm sorry," I muttered. I didn't like apologizing.

"Anyway, we weren't the richest family in the world…" He pulled something out of the pocket of his orange jumper and held it out to me.

I took it. It was two photos.

"That's my wife, Alice." He smiled. "The other one's Anna."

His wife looked just like his daughter - same big, blue eyes. Same bright smile. Anna didn't have any hair, but she was beautiful.

"They're both beautiful," I said softly, handing him the photos.

He smiled, looking down at them before shoving them back in his pocket.

"We didn't have enough money for treatments, and Alice and I were working our butts off. But, it wasn't enough." His eyes were staring behind my head, zoned out, as if his mind was remembering something else. "The only alternative left, I decided, was to rob a bank." He sighed, shaking his head. "I couldn't let her die. She was coming close, and those goddamn doctors wouldn't help us." He slammed his fist down onto the table.

I jumped from the sound.

His teeth were gritted together. "This hospital was no ST. Jude's," he said. "They wouldn't give you treatments unless you paid. We would've went to St. Jude's, but we didn't even have enough money to drive all the way down there." He shook his head. "You know the rest, I guess," he muttered.

I gulped. "And…your family? What happened to them?"

He put his head in his hands. "Alice left with Anna to go to ST. Jude's as soon as I was arrested. She said she needed to try to get there. But…they didn't get there in time."

A little kid died. That wasn't fucking right.

"The hospital should be sued," I muttered, tracing patterns on the table with my finger.

He shrugged. "Not like I can do much now." He gestured his arms around at the gym.

I nodded. "I guess you were right then," I said.

"About what?"

"That some crimes are passion." Mine was.

Bella POV

I ran to the mail box again to check. The mail was supposed to come right about now. It was Saturday, so the mail should be here. I jumped down the last two steps, stopping in front of my mother as she held a big stack of mail in her arms.

"Anything for me?" I asked, staring down at the letters for Edward's perfect handwriting.

She looked through it, shaking her head. "Not this week, Bella."

Again? This was the second week Edward hadn't replied to my mail.

I frowned, then decided to head back up to my room. I was almost to the top of the stairs when my mom stopped me.

"Wait, Bella, come here."

I slowly turned. "Yes?" I asked.

My mom looked uncomfortable. She bit her lip nervously, then sat on the couch in the living room. She patted the spot next to her, telling me to sit next to her.

I did, then asked, "Mom, what's this about?"

She took a deep breath. "I know you have an odd fixation with that Edward boy, Bella. It hasn't escaped my notice."

"It's not a fixation," I said in a sharp tone. "It's…love." I felt uncomfortable talking about my love with Edward to my mother. It didn't seem right.

She let out a deep breath. "He's not good for you, Bella. Look, he hasn't even written to you in two weeks!" She held up the stack of mail she was holding.

"He'll write. He promised." Even I could tell that I didn't believe he would write. It had been two weeks, and he promised he'd write every day. Where were the letters?

"What I'm trying to say is, you deserve better."

"I don't want anything 'better'. Edward is all I want."

"You're fourteen, Bella. You don't know what love is," she said.

I stood up, gaping at her. "And you do?! You and dad don't love each other! You don't kiss or hug or laugh! _You _don't know what love is. Sometimes, I think you don't even love me." I shook my head. "Edward will write. He promised." With that, I left the room.

Once I was in my room, I decided to write Edward a letter. Maybe my letters had gotten lost in the mail, and that's why he hasn't been writing.

Dear Edward,

Why haven't you been writing me? I've been waiting for the letters, and they're not coming. I'm getting anxious now. My mom is trying to fill my head with lies. She's trying to say you don't love me, but I know that's not true, right? You love me still, right?

Please, please find time to reply. I need to hear from you. I love you, Edward. I always will.

Love,

Bella

I lay on my bed, holding the new letter to Edward to my chest. I'd send this first thing tomorrow. It was late, and I needed sleep. I put the letter on my nightstand next to my bed, then shut the light. I shut my eyes, taking in a deep breath to stifle the tears that wanted to fall.

My mom wasn't right. Edward still loved me. Maybe his letters got lost in the mail. Maybe the cops wouldn't let him send letters this week and the last. Maybe…it was true.

No. I wouldn't let myself believe this. Edward loved me. He did…right?

Edward POV

"Joe!" I called to the mailman.

He turned, his big bag nearly falling off his shoulder with the swift movement.

"Anything for me?" I asked, my brows furrowed.

He shuffled through his letters, then shook his head. "Sorry, Edward."

I sighed, then sat back on my bed.

Why wasn't Bella writing to me anymore? It's been two weeks, and I still hadn't gotten a reply.

Did she not love me anymore? Did she realize how much of a mistake she was making?

I shut my eyes, then turned over in my cot to face the wall. I needed sleep. Tomorrow, I'd send her another letter, and if she didn't reply, I'd stop, and wait for her to answer. I didn't want to seem like a desperate loser.


	14. Breathe Me

Chapter 14

Bella POV

When I woke up, the letter was gone.

_What the hell?_

"Mom, dad!" I shouted as I ran down the stairs, still in my pajamas. "Where is my letter! It was on my nightstand, and now it's-" I stopped in the doorway of the kitchen when I saw something unspeakable. "M-mom?" I whispered.

She slowly turned away from the counter, my letter in her hand.

"What are you doing?" I asked quietly, biting back my anger.

"It's not what it looks like," she said quickly.

My eyes scanned the counter behind her. I saw the blinking light of the garbage disposal, meaning it was being used. I saw two other letters sitting on the counter next to it, and my letter from today in her hand.

"You're destroying the letters!" I accused, though, my accusation was definitely correct.

"Bella, just calm down," she said in an overly calm voice.

I charged over and ripped the letter from her hand.

"How dare you! You think you can try and wreck everything I have with Edward?! You're such a…" I paused, trying to think of the right word to call someone like her. I found it. "A bitch!"

She gasped.

It all happened in slow motion then. Her hand whipped out, sending me flying across the room. My head smacked into the counter, and I heard her say, "Bella, I'm sorry!"

My eyes were shut. There was a loud ringing in my ear, and it was hard to identify what was going on. I could feel warm wetness pooling from the back of my head, where my head had smacked against the counter top. My eyes slowly opened, but I wasn't controlling the action. I looked down at the floor I was on and saw red. My blood. I looked up from the floor and saw my mom talking frantically on the phone. She was crying, with blood dripping off her fingers.

"It was an accident, Charlie!" she bawled into the phone. "I only meant to slap her, but I-" She stopped, and I could hear my dad's angry yelling from the phone from all the way over here. "I was going to slap her because she called me a…. What do you mean you don't care what she was going to say?! She can't speak to me like that!"

I shut my eyes again, letting myself drift into unconsciousness.

* * *

_Beep. Beep. Beep._

I could feel my eyelids fluttering.

_Beep. Beep. Beep._

The beeping rhythm was getting on my nerves. I knew the sound, though. It was like a…. Ugh, I couldn't even remember. I didn't even know where I was. I didn't even know what had happened!

I moved my hands around, trying to find out where I was. I could feel softness. Sheets. A bed. I was on a bed.

"Look, Charlie, she's waking up!" I heard my mom's voice shout.

I blew out a breath I didn't know I had been holding, then opened my eyes.

My mom and dad were sitting next to the bed I was on. I looked around the room. The walls were white, and I could see an open door, revealing a hospital hallway. I was in the hospital…? Why?

"W-what happened?" I asked in a croaky voice.

My dad took my hand, and I looked down at our entwined hands. I nearly vomited when I saw what was stuck inside the vein of my wrist. A big IV needle.

"You don't remember?" my mom gasped, her eyes wide.

I furrowed my brows, thinking hard. All I could remember was…nothing really. I couldn't really remember anything that happened recently. All I remembered was me walking home during October, then, it all went black. Everything from me walking home, and back, I could remember. However, I couldn't remember anything after me walking home.

I shook my head. "All I remember is me walking home. It was October 11th, and…then it goes black."

My mom and dad gave each other panicked looks.

"What?" I asked, annoyed. I felt a big stinging in the back of my head and winced. "Ugh, my head is killing me. Is that why I'm here? Did I fall when I was walking home, or something?" That wouldn't be unlikely.

"Honey, do you remember what happened these past few months?" my dad asked, his voice tight.

I looked down at my arms. They were covered in scratches. I tried really hard to remember where I got them, but I couldn't.

"No," I said.

My dad smacked his head. "Oh, no." He held his face in his hands, and mumbled something that sounded like, "The poor guy."

My mom started to burst out crying, and I flinched. She ran from the room, and my dad didn't even move.

"Maybe it wasn't meant to be," my dad whispered into his hands.

"Dad, please, what happened?" I begged. I knew I was missing something huge. It felt like a big chunk of…something, was gone from my head. It was something important. I could even feel a tugging at my heart, a pain. Not a physical pain, but an emotional one. Why would I be emotionally sad?

"I…don't know where to begin," he whispered. He shook his head. "No, when he gets out, that's when you'll know."

"When who gets out of where?!" I was getting annoyed now.

"It's not my story to tell," he whispered, looking me straight in the eyes. "Maybe, in time, you'll remember."

I hoped my dad was right, because, apparently, I was missing a lot. It felt like I had been asleep for the longest time ever.

"I hope you're right," I said aloud.

My dad kissed my forehead, then said, "I'm going to go check on your mother, then we'll go home."

I nodded, watching as he walked out.

I was home now. The doctor said I fell, but when he said this, my mother started crying again, saying over and over she was sorry. For what? I had stitches on the back of my head, and when they showed me them, I actually vomited. They were weaving in and out of my scalp, covered in dry, crusty blood.

I decided to sleep now. There was nothing else to do. When I walked into the kitchen, there was dry blood scattered across the floor. I asked my dad what happened, but he wouldn't tell me.

_Strange._

It was about midnight, and I was fighting to keep my eyes open. I knew it was silly, but I was afraid to go to sleep. I thought maybe I'd miss another chunk of my life.

I lay in my bed, wrapped in my purple sheets like they were a warm cocoon. For some reason, I didn't feel safe. I felt like I was being watched by someone. I felt haunted, like there was a dark, but inviting past somewhere. I searched my mind the whole night, trying to find one bit of information that could uncover the whole ship load that was lost somewhere in the deep depths of my mind.

By the time I gave up searching, it was four in the morning. I sighed, then shut my nightstand light off. I'd get some sleep, and maybe all the answers I had been searching for would turn up. I hoped they would.

Edward POV

_Clank. Clank. Clank._

What the hell! Can a guy get some fucking sleep around here?

I jumped from my cot, then went over to where the clanking was coming from. Some asshole was smacking against the jail cell bars.

"What do you want, Chief?" I asked drowsily, rubbing my eyes.

He gulped. "Edward, I have bad news."

I went rigid.

Why did everything that was bad have to come my way? It was like I had a fucking black cat stitched to my back.

I took a deep breath, then blew it out.

I couldn't see anything. The only light that showed the faint outline of the Chief was the moonlight. From what I could see, he was biting his lip, staring down at something in his hands.

"Just say it," I whispered.

"It's Bella."

I think my heart may have detached from my chest, and was now plummeting painfully slow down to my stomach.

"Is she…hurt?" I asked in a tight voice. It felt like my fucking throat was closing in on itself.

"Not really," he said.

I grabbed his shirt through the bars, and pulled him against them roughly. It made a loud cracking sound.

"Don't be so fucking cryptic! Either she's hurt, or she's not!"

"I wouldn't know what the definition of hurt would be for this situation," he explained quickly. "Just, let me go, and I'll explain."

I took a deep breath, then threw him away from the bars.

"Spit it out," I hissed between clenched teeth.

He cleared his throat while adjusting his messed up shirt.

"Her mother hit her."

That bitch was going to be fucking messed up in the face.

"Did she get arrested?" I asked, hopeful.

"No."

I kicked the bars, and they shook.

"Why the hell not?! I get sent to jail for doing _nothing, _and this bitch hits her daughter and doesn't get sent away?! That's fucking messed up."

"I know, Edward. But, she is a very rich person. You know how it is. Also, she claims she didn't mean to hit her that hard."

I went up to the bars again, and wrapped my tight fists around the bars, sticking my face out.

"How hard are we talking?" I growled.

I almost smiled at the image of me pushing that bitch down a flight of stairs. Ah, that would be nice.

"She meant to slap her, but apparently she used more force than was necessary. She passed out after smacking her head against a granite counter top, and went to the hospital."

My eyes widened. "Is she-is she okay?" I stuttered, fighting back the urge to start crying like a baby.

"She woke up, but…"

_Spit it out!_

"She lost her memory, Edward. She can't remember anything from before the day she was walking home from school - the day she was kidnapped."

My brow furrowed. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, she has no memory of James kidnapping her, no memory of her mother hitting her, and…she has no idea who you are."

* * *

**The song used in this chapter is Breathe Me by Sia. It's a very good song :) anyways, you know the drill.**

**If you read, review.**


	15. You Found Me

**For some reason, this is my favorite chapter ever. I don't know why. I guess it's the feeling of reunion and the cuteness of it all, you know? Enjoy, and leave a review if you care about my happiness :)**

* * *

Chapter 15

_8 months later_

Edward POV

"I'll miss you, Edward," Jasper said, patting me on the back.

I smiled, then gave him a man hug.

I was getting out. Now I would be able to see Bella. Even though she didn't know who I was, I'd still try. I'd been writing her letters everyday since the day I found out that she lost her memory. Still, there was no reply.

I stepped out of the jail, the sound of the buzzing of the door lock letting me out the best sound I'd heard in a lifetime. It was sunny out today - August. Bella would be out of school, so she'd probably be home.

Like a stalker, I checked a phonebook that was inside a phone booth. I found her address - 20 Franklin Street. I didn't care if her parents didn't want me there. I was going to push my way through the door, and maybe "accidentally" push Bella's mom into a granite countertop.

_Oops._

I started down the street. I didn't know what I was going to do with my life now. I hadn't really thought about that. The only thing on my mind for these past months, was Bella. I would just lay in my bed, thinking about her.

I needed a life.

I also needed to get a job. If Bella did ever want to be with me again, I'd need to be able to take care of her, like I always wanted to do.

I finally made it to her house. Her house wasn't really a _house, _it was more of a fucking mansion. There was some dude trimming the hedges, and there were tons of flowers everywhere. I couldn't even get into the house. There was a giant gate that you needed to be buzzed in to get into the actual walkway of the house. I doubted Bella's mom would let me in.

_Nice plan, Edward. Nice plan, _I mentally scolded myself.

I began to walk away, when something smashed into me.

"Hey, watch where you're go-" I stopped mid-sentence when I saw what and who had crashed into me.

Bella. On a…bike.

A big smile started to fill my lips.

_I _taught her how to ride a bike.

"I'm so sorry!" she gasped. "I'm not that good at stopping this thing." Her cheeks were red. She had a small pout on her lips as she kicked the tire of the bike.

"It's…not a problem."

Well, this was weird. How could she not know me? It was so fucking strange. I kissed her, I even fucking took a shower with her! Yet, she had no clue. God, she reminded me of a two year old.

"Well, um, I'm going to get going," she mumbled, her head down as she started to push away.

"Wait!" I shouted. I put my hand out, pulling her bike to a stop.

She stared at me strangely, surprised.

"Are you Bella Swan?" God, this was weird.

Her eyes went into slits before she nodded.

"Uh, can we like, walk together?" I asked.

"But I don't know you," she said, taking a step away from me.

"Yeah…but I know you."

She started to go closer to the gates to her house. "Should I be freaked out?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

I laughed, shaking my head. "No."

"How do you know me?" she asked, cocking her head to the side.

I sighed, rubbing the back of my neck with my hand. "It's kind of a long story."

"I have time," she said, smiling.

I almost had a fucking stroke. How could someone be so beautiful?

"Uh, umm…" Speak Edward! "If you walk with me, I'll explain."

She pursed her lips, then threw her bike against the gate. It made a loud noise, making the guy trimming the hedges jump, dropping his giant hedge clippers.

"Come on then," she said, motioning me with her hand to follow her.

I did like a lost puppy.

I took in what she was wearing. She was wearing _very _short denim shorts, and a _very _tight purple tank top.

God, forgive my sinful thoughts.

Bella POV

I couldn't believe it was him! It was the boy I had been seeing in my dreams for the past eight months, and now, finally, he was _actually _here. It was so surreal. He looked exactly the same as in my dreams, but maybe even better. His extremely green eyes were more bright. They were like two glistening emeralds, hypnotizing me into doing whatever he asked. His hair was longer now than in my dreams, and his smile made my heart stop. It was crooked, lifting up on one side and making me weak at the knees.

He asked me to walk with him, and it was weird. My heart stopped doing the hurtful tugging it had been doing ever since I woke up in the hospital, and as soon as I saw him about to leave my house while I was riding my bike, it stopped.

_How strange…_

My mom always told me not to go with strangers - more so than she used to - and yet I went. I had an odd surge of safeness around him. It seemed like I knew him, maybe in another life, or something.

"So…" I said, breaking the awkward silence.

We were walking down the street, and it was just silent. He said he'd explain this weirdness, so he better.

"So…" he repeated.

"Explain," I said.

He took a deep breath. "You know me, and I know you."

I laughed. "But I _don't_ know you," I contradicted. "If I did, I'd know your name, which I don't."

"My name is Edward Masen."

Edward…. Why did that name feel so familiar? It felt right as it rolled around in my head.

"Edward," I whispered. It even felt good rolling off my tongue. "My parents said I lost my memory," I told him.

He nodded. "I know."

I stared up at him, my eyes in slits. "How do you know?"

"The Chief told me."

"Chief? You mean Chief Rogers?"

He nodded.

"Are you a policeman, or something? You look a little too young, though. And if you were, my dad would know you. He used to be the Chief, before he quit."

He chuckled. "No, I'm not a policeman," he laughed. "And I'm eighteen, you're fourteen."

I stopped walking.

He turned to look at me, raising an eyebrow. "What?" he asked.

"Are you a stalker?" I said quickly.

He laughed. "No, I'm not." He took a step closer to me, and I backed away.

My heart rate sped up.

"You told me all this," he explained.

I shook my head. "No, no I didn't. I'd remember you, and I don't. And if you were so important to me, my parent's would have said something about you, but they didn't."

He groaned. "You did tell me those things, and I am important to you! How else would I know that your favorite color is purple? That you like reading classic romance novels, but you haven't ever read one in your life? You know how to play piano. You hate soda. Your birthday is September 11th, and-"

"You're a stalker!" I screamed. I started running away, back to my house.

"No, Bella, wait!" I heard his footsteps behind me as he ran after me.

"Leave me alone!" I screamed. I quickly typed in the password to the lock to open the gate, then threw my bike in as the gates opened.

"Bella!"

I jumped inside, then shut the gate behind me.

He stopped running in front of the gate, then just stared at me, breathing heavily.

"Go away," I whispered, breathing heavily, too.

"I can't," he whispered back.

"Why?!" I yelled, stamping my foot like a baby. "I don't know you!"

He groaned, shutting his eyes. "Why can't you just remember?" he said quietly, leaning his head against the gate.

I leaned in closer for emphasis. Maybe now he'd understand. Our noses were touching as he stared at me, wide-eyed.

"I. Don't. Know. You." Each word, separate and distinct.

He huffed, then leaned in closer.

_Holy…_

"Maybe this will make you remember," he breathed across my face.

I was about to protest, but it was too late.

His lips came down on mine, soft and urgent. I wanted to stop him, but my resolve was slowly melting away into this magical kiss. I knew I had to stop this, before I started kissing him back.

I opened my eyes, then looked around. I saw a rock. This will get him to stop. I smashed the rock against the side of his face.

"Ouch!" he screamed, pulling back.

I dropped the rock back with the other one's, then took a step away from him, afraid he'd hit me for hitting him.

"Jeez, you could've just pulled back," he muttered, rubbing the side of his face.

I saw his fingertips, and they were coated in red.

I gasped. "Oh my God!" My eyes widened; I wasn't good around blood.

He wiped the blood on his jeans, then took a step away from the gate.

"I'm…sorry, I guess," I muttered, embarrassed.

"It's…okay, I guess," he mocked, smirking.

"Go home," I murmured, then turned away, pulling my bike back to my house.

Edward was a weirdo. Who just randomly kisses people?!

"Bells?" my dad called at the sound of the front door being opened.

"Yes, dad?" I said, pulling my sneakers off.

"I saw you and Edward," he said, grinning.

My brow furrowed. "How do you know him?"

My dad sighed. "Didn't we explain this, Bella? You lost your memory."

I rolled my eyes. "I know, it's just that…it's so weird. How could I forget him if he was so important to me? And why didn't you tell me about him?" I looked up at my dad, frowning.

He patted the top of my head like he always used to do when I was little. "It wasn't my story to tell, and you'll remember…in time."

Edward POV

What the hell! I can't believe she hit me with a rock! Now I had a fucking cut on my left temple. That girl could have seriously hurt me.

I frowned as I stared at her house. The sun was beating down heavily on the big roof of her home - an odd thing in Forks for the sun to be out. The guy cutting the hedges was working meticulously, and all was calm.

Yeah, sure it was. That little meeting I just had with Bella was anything but "calm". It was fucking painful, that's what it was.

I shoved my hands in my pockets, then leaned against the gate. I'd wait all night if I had to for Bella to come back out. It was summer; she wouldn't stay in the house all day.

Just as I was beginning to relax, the big gates buzzed loudly, meaning they were opening. I fell backwards since I was leaning on the once closed gates, my head smacking against the gravel covered ground.

"Shit…" I muttered under my breath as my head started throbbing. Seriously, was my head the best target for smacking today?

"Edward Masen," a woman's voice murmured.

I looked up - still on the ground - and saw a woman standing above me, her hands on her curvy hips. She looked just like Bella. She had the same ivory skin, and a flush of pink that never left her cheeks. Even her eyes were the same deep brown.

I stood up from the ground, brushing the dirt and rocks from my pants.

"Mrs. Swan." I nodded. My hands were balled into fists at my sides, my jaw taught.

"I saw that little spectacle you just made." She nodded her head over to the open gateway. "How dare you think you can touch my daughter at all! She doesn't have any idea who you are. You think you can just use her like a-"

"Whoa, whoa, lady. Let's hold up for a second. You're-" I pointed a finger at her, "the reason she can't remember anything."

Her mouth shut, and she stared down at the ground.

"You think that _I _shouldn't be touching her?" I laughed at the irony. "You're the one that hurt her. I'd never, _ever_ do anything to hurt her."

"But you did already," Bella's mom said. She looked up at me, her eyes in slits. "You left her once."

I snorted. "You actually would have preferred for her to stay with a murderer? What kind of mother are you?" I asked rhetorically.

"None of this would have ever happened if you didn't send her back," she hissed.

"What the hell!" I screamed, taking a step closer to her. "I did the right thing. _Normal_ people would be happy that their daughters were not kidnapped anymore. So what the fuck is your problem?!"

She took a step away from me. "I can see now where Bella is getting her horrendous vocabulary from."

"Cut the shit, woman. Seriously, what is your problem?"

She sighed, her eyes moving back to the ground.

"I just want my daughter to be happy."

"So smacking her across the room is supposed to make her happy?" I questioned, raising an eyebrow.

She shook her head. "_That _was an accident."

I smirked. "I'm guessing you haven't even told her yet?" I asked.

She bit her lip, and she looked just like Bella. It was freaky.

"No, I haven't, and I'd like to keep it that way. We don't get along at all as it is. I wouldn't want another problem between us."

"So that means I can't tell her?"

She smiled slightly. "No, you can't."

I sighed. "Listen, I don't forgive you for hitting her. I might hold a grudge forever."

She looked me in the eyes, a glare on her face. "And I will never forgive you for starting all this."

With that, she pushed me away, then shut the gate, leaving me standing on the other end, locked out of her house.

"Go home, Mr. Masen!" she called over her shoulder as she walked back into the house.

_Bitch._


	16. Sleep Alone

Chapter16

Bella POV

"_Bella, run!" Edward shouts._

_My eyes are wide as I watch a man try to repeatedly stab Edward._

"_Go, Bella!" Edward yells, trying to dodge the swift movements of the man's knife._

_I shake my head. "No, I can't."_

_The man turns to me, a crazed smile on his chapped lips. "Do you want this to happen to you, too?" he questions._

_I gulp. "What?"_

_He smirks. "This." Then, without any warning, he stabs Edward in the chest._

_A strangled sob escapes from my lips, and I fall to my knees on the dirty floor. "No!" I gasp. My voice was breathless, tight. "No, Edward, you can't leave me! No, no, no…"_

_The man stands, holding the giant knife dripping with Edward's blood. The red color soaks into the white of the carpet, slowly deepening, and fanning out, covering everything with red…_

"_Your turn," he whispers._

_I scream and fight, but it doesn't matter. The knife swiftly jabs into me, my screams cutting off with a gurgled, "Edward…"_

* * *

"Bella?" I heard a voice whisper.

"No, Edward, no…" I mumbled.

The dream vanished in a swirl, like dirt in water. It swirled around me. Everything was gone except me, slowly dying with the knife stuck in my heart.

"Bella, it's okay!" someone whispered.

The black, swirling started to diffuse, and reality started to come back to me. I could hear the sound of crickets, and the low, rhythmic patter of something that sounded like rain. I could feel warm, wetness on my cheeks, and my eyes were stinging. I realized I was dreaming again. However, this time it wasn't a wonderful dream like it has been for the past months. It was a _nightmare._

"E-Edward!" I blubbered, sitting upright in my bed.

It was pitch black in my room, and I was sobbing. I could hear thunder rattling the house, and the sound of rain sliding down the roof, smacking against my window.

I then gasped when I felt a warm pair of familiar arms wrap around my waist.

"I'm here," Edward's voice whispered.

Wait. Edward?!

I turned to the lamp, then turned it on.

There, sitting on the edge of my bed, holding me, was Edward from this afternoon.

I began to scream but he covered my mouth.

"Shush! Your parents will wake up!" he hissed.

I removed his hand from my mouth.

"How the hell did you get in my room?!" I gasped, pulling the blanket to cover my braless form. I didn't like when people saw me without a bra…

He motioned his head to the window. "The window."

"That's not weird…" I mumbled, staring at him. I realized then that he was soaking wet. "You're wet!"

He laughed. "Um, yes, I am."

"Why…?"

"It's raining," he said.

A blush swam into my cheeks. "Oh…" Well, I felt like an idiot.

Edward wiped his fingertips across my cheeks, and it made my cheeks warm. Not like I was blushing - which I still was - but like I had put a blanket over myself. It felt comfortable…safe.

Then, I remembered he snuck into my room, and pulled back.

"Why did you sneak into my room?" I hissed.

"I wanted to see you," he said, shrugging.

"Did you really have to sneak into my house like a convict?" I asked in a whisper.

He nodded.

I groaned. "You know, you're really irritating."

He grinned, then shook his head. "You looked like you needed some help, anyways."

My brow furrowed.

"You were crying and screaming in your sleep," he explained.

Ugh. He just loved to embarrass me. I could feel my cheeks getting even redder. Ugh, oh God.

"Yeah, well it's not your job to help me," I contradicted.

"Yes it is," he said calmly, annoyingly so. "I promised you I would always be there for you."

"Well, I don't remember you saying that, so it's a moot point, anyway."

He yanked his jacket off, then lay back on my bed, kicking his sneakers off. He rested his head on his hands, perfectly at ease.

It was infuriating.

"Well, I did say it. So don't try to prove me wrong."

I pursed my lips. I would prove him wrong. I wanted to.

"Well, if you promised you'd always be here to help me, where were you the day I fell?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

His smile fell. He looked hurt, and I instantly felt horrible. What the hell, why did I care? But I did. There was no denying it, unfortunately.

"I wasn't here because I was in jail."

I gasped. "You escaped from prison!" My eyes widened, and I scooted farther away from him on the bed. There was a felon on my bed!

"No, I did not fucking escape. I am done with my sentence, Miss. Know It All." He glared at me.

Huh, that struck a nerve.

"Sorry," I mumbled, staring at my bed sheets.

It was silent. The only sound was the crickets and the rain and thunder. It made it all the more eerie.

"What did you do?" I asked quietly.

I looked up to find him staring intensely at me, as if he was remembering something far away.

"I saved you," he whispered almost inaudibly.

"From what?" I asked.

He grimaced. "James Cullen."

I went rigid.

The name sent a roll of nausea through me. It sickened me, and yet, I had no idea who that was.

"He kidnapped you," he whispered.

"I was never kidnapped," I said, my eyes wide. "I think I'd remember _that_."

He laughed, but it was filled with stress. "Well, apparently, you don't."

I huffed, moving closer to him unconsciously. "How did you find me?"

"I lived with him. He kidnapped me before he kidnapped you when I was twelve," he explained as he picked at a loose string on my sheets. "And…we fell in love." He laughed humorously. "But you probably don't remember that either, do you?" he shot, his eyes cold.

I flinched at his expression.

_Like it was my fault I couldn't remember, _I thought to myself.

His face fell. "Sorry," he mumbled. "I didn't mean to…be a bitch."

I laughed in a whisper. "It's okay."

He smiled, and I smiled back.

"But you really don't remember me? At all?"

I shook my head.

He frowned.

"But…I do dream about you." Oh, God, I was going to die of embarrassment.

He grinned cockily. "I know, I'm very dreamy."

I smacked his arm.

It was silent in the room again, but this time it was comfortable.

"Was I in this dream?" he asked after a long while.

I stared down at my hands that were sitting in my lap.

"I've been dreaming about you every night, for eight months. You were the only thing I thought about, and when I saw you today, I nearly died."

Edward stared at me for a long time, just looking over my whole face.

I bit my lip. I could feel the heat emitting from my cheeks at an alarming rate. I actually would have preferred passing out rather than this. My heart was beating so loudly, I was surprised he didn't hear it. I could feel the blood pulsing through my veins. I took a deep, ragged breath.

He leaned in, his nose skimming against mine.

My heart actually stopped a beat, then started up again, faster than was healthy.

"Please don't hit me with something again," he murmured. His sweet breath fanned out across my face, and my mouth actually watered.

I licked my lips instinctively, moving closer until our lips were on each others. Our breaths were shooting out embarrassingly loudly into each other's mouths, but neither of us seemed to care. I know I didn't. He shut his eyes, and I shut mine, too.

Then, his lips met mine once again.

Electricity shot through our conjoined lips as he brought my bottom lip into his mouth, and I did the same to his top lip. I pulled his neck, trying to get his face closer to mine. It didn't seem to work, so unthinkingly, I threw myself at him.

Well, not literally _threw._

I wrapped my legs around his waist as I sat in his lap. He opened his mouth, and I did, too. His tongue was warm, and it was strange how I could just kiss him as if I'd done it before. It felt natural. His tongue glided across my bottom lip and I shivered.

"I missed you," he breathed.

I smiled at his words.

"I missed you, too," I said. I did, and it was weird. I didn't even know him.

He smiled too, then brought my mouth back to his urgently. He leaned forward, bringing me down so that my back was on the bed.

My legs were still securely wrapped around his waist, and I could feel…him. It made me want to laugh loudly, or just roll around on the floor. He made me feel so…strange. I could never recall ever feeling like this, but now, I did. I tangled my fingers in his hair, and his bronze hair was so soft.

"I'm sorry," I murmured against his lips.

He kissed down my jaw, to my neck. I think my eyes rolled to the back of my head, and stayed there.

"For what?" he asked in a husky voice.

His voice made me want to scream like a giddy, little girl.

"For not remembering you," I whispered.

He stopped his movements, then sat up, looking down at me.

"It's not your fault," he whispered.

I grabbed two fistfuls of his shirt, yanking him closer to me.

"But I want to remember you." I could feel tears stinging my eyes.

It wasn't fair. How could I not remember someone who loved me, and who I loved back?! It was like I had the worst luck in the world. Or maybe, I had the best luck in the world, because he was mine. I knew he'd stay with me forever. He didn't even want to leave me now, when I couldn't remember him.

"You're crying," he noted. He wiped his index finger on my cheek, then pulled back his finger to examine my tear. "Why?"

"Because it's not fair," I said in a tear filled voice.

He pulled me to his chest, crushing me. But I wasn't complaining.

I wrapped my arms around his waist, taking in big gulps of his amazing scent. I had smelled his scent before, and yet couldn't remember where anything had ever smelled this amazing. I knew it was because I had smelled him before, even though I couldn't remember it.

"Go to sleep," he murmured.

"Will you stay?" I asked, looking up at him.

He grinned. "If you want me to."

I nodded, pulling him down with me on the bed.

He lay next to me, his arms still wrapped securely around me.

I shut the light, then listened to Edward's easy breathing.

Edward was _mine._


	17. Show Me What I'm Looking For

Chapter 17

Edward POV

I jolted from my position on Bella's bed. I looked over to my right to see Bella still asleep. I smiled, kissing her forehead. I stood from the bed, pulling my shoes and coat back on. Bella mumbled incoherent words in her sleep as I quietly opened the window. Then, one thing she said caught my attention. I slowly turned from the window, my mouth agape. I walked over to her, staring down at her in awe.

She had said she…loved me. It made my heart sing like a fucking girl. It made a giant, goofy grin spread across my face.

_She loved me._

"Mm…" Bella murmured as my hand caressed the top of her head. She reached out and grabbed my hand, pulling it closer to her. "Morning," she mumbled, rubbing her eyes.

I grinned. "Morning."

"Bella, are you awake!" her mom shouted. I could hear the distant sound of her footsteps on the stairs.

"Shit," I cursed under my breath, running to the window. I fell -smooth - then knocked over her lamp.

I heard her suppressed giggles and turned to glare playfully at her.

"I wouldn't be laughing," I whispered. "Your mom is probably going to kill us both if she finds me in here. And, she might just castrate me."

She laughed more. "Go then," she laughed, motioning to the window. "We wouldn't want that to happen, would we?"

I laughed uneasily. "Ha, no we definitely wouldn't."

I didn't know about her, but I definitely didn't want my man parts to be cut off, or, however she was planning on taking them off.

I shivered.

"Okay, then. I'll see you later…?" I said in more of a question tone. I wasn't really sure if she wanted me here, but it sounded like it from what I heard while she was sleeping.

She nodded. "It's summer. Maybe we could go swimming today."

Bella plus bathing suit equaled me definitely there.

I nodded quickly. "Yeah, I'll meet you outside your palace," I said as I went out the window.

I climbed down the trellis on the side of her house carefully. I didn't think her parents would like to see me freefalling off their house. I landed on the ground, fixing myself as I prepared myself to climb over the gate.

"Edward!" a man's voice called.

Oh, shit. I had been caught. Well, wasn't this just dandy?

I slowly turned, biting my tongue.

Maybe I could run…

Then I saw who it was and calmed down. It was Bella's father. He seemed to like me, so I guess I wouldn't have to worry about being castrated now.

"Hi, Mr. Swan."

He shook his head, smiling. "Call me Charlie."

"Okay, then. Charlie."

He cleared his throat, pursing his lips. "I, uh, saw you come in yesterday."

Okay, Edward. Grab your balls, and run.

"Um, what do you mean?" I asked, nervous.

"I saw you sneaking in," he laughed.

"Oh." If I was Bella, my face would be super red. "I'm sorry. I just-"

"No, no," he interrupted. "I just wanted to tell you, it's okay with me."

My eyes went into slits, disbelieving. "Really?"

He laughed. "Yes. Despite what Renée - her mother," he clarified, "thinks, I think you two should stay together."

"Really?" I asked again.

He chuckled. "Yes, I do. I'm not as heartless as you think I am."

"I don't think you're heartless," I defended. "No offence, but your wife is a bitch."

He grimaced. "She's…" He shook his head. "Anyway, I think you treat Bella well, and you do seem to like her."

I nodded. "I…love her." It isn't a very nice time when telling the girl you loves father you love their daughter.

He smiled genuinely. "Good, because she told me she loves you, too."

Huh. I knew she loved me, but it made my ego boost to hear it from someone else, too.

"So I was thinking…" He trailed off, eyeing me uneasily. "I know it might not be your style, or whatever, but I was wondering if you'd like to have dinner tomorrow night. At our house."

"I don't know," I muttered, staring at my dirt covered shoes. "Do you think Renée really wants me there?"

"We already agreed on it," he said. "We'd love to get to know you."

Ugh. Well, as much as I didn't want to go, I guess it wouldn't hurt to know Bella's parents more.

"Okay, sure," I agreed.

He smiled, turning to leave. "Excellent. I'll see you tomorrow night at seven."

"Sure…" I muttered.

I climbed over the fence, then headed down town. I had no idea where I was going, but I had to do something. Maybe I could start looking for a job.

Bella POV

"Can I come in?" my mom asked through the door.

I stood up from my bed, then said, "Yeah, come on in."

My mom came in, dressed in jeans and a pink blouse.

Weird. My mom never wore "causal" clothes.

"What's up?" I asked, brushing my hair. I looked at my mother through the mirror. She looked annoyed.

"Your father and I decided that maybe it would be nice if Edward came over for dinner tomorrow night at seven."

I turned around in my chair, my eyebrow raised.

"You mean, dad forced you into agreeing," I stated.

I wasn't dumb. Whenever my father would mention him she would get annoyed. I never knew what they were talking about back then, but now that I did, it suddenly all made sense. My mom definitely wouldn't want someone like Edward to be with me. He wasn't the most…proper guy in the world. People in my family were like royalty. No one could be with someone of low standards. But maybe, just maybe I could break that.

My mom sighed. "I would like to meet this boy, too, Bella," my mom sighed, still standing awkwardly in the doorway.

"He's not a bad guy, mom," I said quietly.

I searched through my drawers, trying to find the perfect bathing suit to wear when I went swimming with Edward today.

My mom came up behind me.

"What's the bathing suit for?" she asked curiously.

I felt awkward telling my mom that I was going swimming alone with Edward. Would she think I was being a little too promiscuous? The better question was, did I care?

"I'm going out later today," I said nonchalantly. "Swimming."

"With Angela?" my mom asked, trying to rein in her obvious interest.

It was probably because ever since the "accident", I hadn't really hung out with any of my friends lately. I also realized I didn't really enjoy hanging out with my friends as much as I used to before. Now, I'd much rather be with Edward.

I was definitely fine with that.

"Um, no," I said. I turned to look up at her. I'd keep close watch on her expression to see if she was really fine with me going with Edward. "Edward and I are going swimming tonight. Maybe at the dock, or something." I raised my eyebrows, as if to say, "How do you like that, mother?"

She gulped, staring down at the purple bikini in my hands.

"Should you really wear something so…skimpy with a boy?" she asked.

I rolled my eyes. "Mom, do you want to know something?"

"I suppose," she said, guarded.

"I am not going to have sex with Edward - well, not any time soon."

My mom gasped, slapping my shoulder lightly.

"Bella, you shouldn't talk about those kind of things!"

"Mom, we're both women here. Moms and daughters are supposed to talk about these kinds of things."

She looked at me skeptically. "Really?" she asked, her eyes in slits.

I laughed. "Your mom never talked about these kinds of things with you?" I raised an eyebrow.

Well, my mother had never spoken about…sexual things with me before, but everyone else's moms had. Angela and her mother always discussed issues she was having. I remembered always being alone in that area. My mom would always be either too busy with work, or just was never around.

My mom and I weren't really good at talking with one another. The only times we'd ever speak was when we were arguing about something. However, lately, that started to change. My mom would actually feign interest now, and come directly to me to talk. It was strange, but I liked it. Maybe now we could talk about mother daughter things.

My mom shook her head. "Not that I know of."

I frowned.

Maybe this was why my mom wasn't good at talking to me about these things, because she never had or heard of those experiences when she was my age. I guess now she didn't see the need to with me since she didn't require it.

"Well we should," I said. "My friends talk about this kind of stuff, so we should, too."

My mom looked uncomfortable. Then she said, "I'm sorry, Bella."

My brow furrowed. "For what?"

"I was never there for you. I'm not really a good mother."

You got that right, I wanted to say. But I felt bad. My mom didn't need anymore guilt. She had been feeling extremely guilty ever since my accident, and I didn't know why. Maybe now I could ease her guilt a little bit.

"It's okay," I said. "You were a good enough mother for me." I was too nice for my own good. She didn't deserve that, but I was giving it to her.

She smiled, then brought me into a hug.

"I love you, Bella."

I awkwardly brought my arms around her small waist.

"I love you, too."

Edward POV

I got a job, the worst job in the world.

I was a pizza delivery guy.

You have got to be kidding me.

Well, at least I had a job. Maybe I'd go back to school or something, get an education that I was forever deprived of when I was younger. For now, this would have to do.

So now that I was back from getting my awesome job, I was standing outside Bella's house, waiting for her to come out. We were going to go swimming. I didn't know where, but I really didn't care. A day spent with Bella was a day well spent.

"Edward!" someone called in a whisper.

I looked across the perfectly green lawn to see Bella running over in…those skimpy jean shorts and her bikini top.

Why, God?

I cleared my throat as she shoved the gate open, smiling brightly at me.

"Hi," I said in an uneven voice.

She raised an eyebrow, but didn't question why I was acting so strange.

"So, uh, where to?" I asked as I walked next to her down a deserted road.

She ignored my question, and gazed out at the dirt covered road.

"You know, this is the road I was on when I got kidnapped," she murmured, looking around.

My fists clenched.

If only I could just see James one more time to knock his face in on itself…

I looked around, too. The road was all dirt, and there were trees and grass on the sides of the country-like road. It was deserted, no cars or homes in sight.

"Why would you walk here alone? It's so…vacant." I could almost picture a tumbleweed slowly rolling across the road.

She shrugged. "This way is shorter to my house, and I never thought I'd ever get kidnapped. It never crossed my mind."

I laughed. "Well, things like that don't really cross people's minds a lot."

She smiled, but it was sad. "I don't remember being kidnapped," she mumbled. "Is that a good or bad thing?" She looked up at me, her eyes sad.

I pursed my lips, unsure.

"Depends," I said finally.

"On what?" she asked.

"On whether you'd want to know everything that happened between you and I, or…if you don't care about that, and are glad you can't remember the pain of what happened."

Her brow furrowed as she stared at her flip-flops.

"I'd want to remember," she whispered. "I want to know everything that ever happened between us." She gestured to the small space between us.

"Well, maybe you'll remember," I said.

She shook her head. "No, I want you to tell me everything."

I raised an eyebrow. "Now?"

She nodded. "Until we get to where we're going. Tell me everything you can remember."

"I remember everything, which is a lot."

She then closed the space between our arms, and took my hand in hers.

"Go ahead."

And so I told her everything - every, little detail.


	18. I Hope That You Will Give Me Some Peace

Chapter 18

We finally got to our swimming destination. It was a dock. There was a giant lake, with trees and grass on either side of it. They were very far from the shore of the dock, so I guess we'd never find out what was there. A forest maybe - that was very possible in Forks. There were no boats, or any other swimmers. It was a nice day out, so I didn't know why no one would be here. The sky was perfectly blue, and there were barely any clouds.

"Why isn't anyone here?" I asked, looking around.

It was creepy with no one else here. The only sound was the calm lapping of the water against the wooden dock.

"My family owns this dock. No one else is allowed to come here," Bella explained.

I whistled. "Jeez, your parents must be loaded."

She laughed. "Yeah, they must be."

Bella pulled her shorts off, and I just stood there, ogling her.

She seemed to notice, because as soon as she caught me staring, her face turned bright red.

"You have _nothing _to be embarrassed about," I said, still staring at her.

"Yeah I do," she mumbled. "I'm plain."

I snorted. "If you're plain, I'd like to see who's pretty."

Now she snorted. "Yeah, sure."

I rolled my eyes, then came up and pulled her to my chest.

"You don't believe me?" I breathed.

"Uh, no?" It was more of a question, so I could see I wasn't that bad looking, either.

I was a stud.

I grinned at her reaction to me.

"How about me?" I asked, stepping back. I twirled and she laughed. "Am I gorgeous?"

She rolled her eyes, still laughing. "I really don't think _you _need an ego boost. How are you always so sure of yourself?" she asked, her eyebrows furrowed.

I yanked my t-shirt off, wearing only my shorts.

"No one's sure of anything," I said. "I'm just sure of what I want."

She took a step closer to me, now ogling me. Yup, a stud.

"And what do you want?" she asked in a very seductive voice.

I didn't know if I should answer that.

"Do you really want me to answer that?" I asked, smirking.

She shoved at my arm, then suddenly started running.

"Uh, Bell-"

She did a cannonball into the water. It was the hottest thing I had ever seen.

I walked over to the edge of the dock, staring down into the sapphire blue water.

_She didn't come up._

Bella POV

I did a cannonball into the water, then floated around underwater. I could hear the sound of Edward walking over to the edge of the dock, then silence. I smirked underwater as I swam under the dock. I stayed as quiet as possible, staring out at the lake as I smiled, waiting for Edward to freak out.

"Bella?" he whispered. "Shit!" He jumped into the water, and I started laughing.

I swam closer to where he was frantically searching for me underwater.

He came up from the water. His back was covered in beads of water, and it reminded me of something…

* * *

_I stare up at him, watching as the warm water pelts his back, spraying off in different directions._

_He pulls me into his arms, and I rest my head against his chest._

"_I'm sorry," he whispers into my hair._

_I look up at him. "For what?"_

"_For everything."_

_I rub his cheek. _

"_I should have made you leave. I'm stupid."_

_I shake my head. "You're not."_

_He leans in to kiss me again, and it is finally a genuine kiss. I wrap my arms around his neck, happy for the first time in too long._

"_I love you," he says again._

_I say it back, and he begins kissing me again._

"_God, I hate myself," he says in a strangled voice._

"_Why?" Why was the only thing coming from my mouth._

_He shakes his head. "This is wrong," he whispers. "I'm eighteen now."_

_I nod. "I know. You told me."_

"_So this, he gestures at the two of us, "is illegal."_

_I don't say anything, because he'd probably get mad if I said I didn't care-which I don't. I don't know what else to do, so I just hungrily yank his face to mine. He kisses me back with more fervor than I had expected. His lips are hot and wet, just like the setting we are in. He lifts me up, and I wrap my legs around his waist. He pushes me against the wall, kissing down my jaw and neck, then back up again._

"_I want you to be happy," he breathes across my neck. His breath is cold compared to the water crashing down on us._

"_I am," I breathe back._

_He looks pained. "I know," he says in a strangled, almost inaudible voice. _

I blinked in surprise as the memory left me. I…just remembered something. I just got a memory back!

"Edward!" I shouted in delight.

He turned, then yanked me to him, squeezing me extremely close to his chest.

"Why the hell did you do that?!" he screamed, kissing my face everywhere. "I thought you were fucking drowning! Shit, I almost started crying!"

I laughed. "I'm sorry," I said, still laughing.

My voice was all happy because I just got a little part of my memory back. My stomach was all bubbly with excitement.

"I got a memory back!" I said in a giddy voice.

He pulled back to look at me, a confused expression on his face.

"What do you mean?"

"When I saw you in the water just now, it reminded me of the time we were in the shower…" I gasped. "Hey! When you were telling me all the stuff that happened before, you never told me we took a shower together!" I hissed, smacking his arm.

He grinned. "Well, I didn't want you to freak out, or something."

I shook my head. "Edward, I got it back! What if I can get every part of my memory back?" I was all excited, practically bouncing in his arms. The water was moving around us loudly from my excited jitters.

"Maybe you could see someone," he said, staring down at me.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Maybe you could see a doctor that, like, specializes in this kind of problem. Maybe they could help you."

My eyes must have been the size of the sun.

"That's brilliant!" I exclaimed. I pulled his lips to mine, kissing him happily. I pulled back, grinning toothily at him. "I love you."

He grinned. "Good, because I love the shit out of you, too."

I smiled even bigger. I was surprised my cheeks weren't cracking.

Maybe Edward was right. Maybe some doctor could help me get _all _my memories back.

We swam together until sun down, then dried off and headed back down the frighteningly familiar road back to my house.

My legs were like JELL-O, useless and wobbly from swimming. I skipped behind Edward as he continued walking down the road, then hopped on his back. Breath shout out of his mouth from me smacking into his back, and he loosened the death grip I had on his neck as I squirmed ungracefully onto him, latching my legs around his waist.

"Are you trying to kill me?" he asked in a tight, breathless voice.

I laughed, loosening my grip on his neck. "Sorry. My legs are so tired," I sighed. I rested my head on his shoulder, shooting breaths into his ear.

He shivered. "You know, I might drop to the ground if you keep doing that, and you'll fall, too."

I smiled, but stopped. I didn't need to fall again.

We got back to my house.

Edward held my wrists as I slowly slipped off his back, a pout evident on my face.

"I have to go now," he sighed, shoving a hand through his unruly hair. His long, bronze hair was pushed back in wet tuffs on his head from swimming.

"You can't come to my room?" I asked, trying my best attempt at puppy-dog eyes.

He grinned. "I know what you're trying to do, and I refuse to be sucked into the Bella void…" He paused, then stepped closer, pulling my waist to him. "As fun as it would be," he murmured almost inaudibly. I didn't even know if I was supposed to hear it.

"But I want you to come to my room," I contradicted. I grabbed his shirt in my hands, yanking him to me roughly.

His eyes widened, surprised by my roughness.

I leaned into his face, my lips against his. "So, come in," I said confidently against his lips.

He was about to kiss me, but I pulled back.

I didn't turn to see his probably furious expression. I just typed in the code to the gates, then walked through as they slowly opened. I continued up the path to the front door, not once looking back to see if he followed.

I knew he would.

I grinned to myself at the sound of his footsteps.

Edward POV

She yanked me to her roughly, and my eyes widened.

Was Bella being…rough with me?

Huh, kind of kinky.

She leaned forward, her lips touching mine. "So, come in," she said strongly against my lips.

My mouth hung open like a horn dog. I leaned forward to close the distance between our lips, but she pulled back. My mouth fell open once again, but this time in shock.

She didn't turn to look at me. She typed in the code to the gates, then walked through. She was all casual, so confident that her little Bella Void would work.

Ha, well it wouldn't. I was two steps ahead of her. How would she like it if I just walked away?

I looked back up at her. She was almost in her house.

I could feel my self-control slowly evaporating as the suction of Bella's void ripped it away from my body, leaving me cold and vulnerable to her sexy powers. I grimaced as my feet started uncontrollably following her.

The little minx.

I shut the front door behind me once I entered her house. Everything looked perfect. I was surprised there wasn't a tiny maid fluttering around the room, dusting things off in a black and white maid uniform.

Everything in the room - which I guessed was a living room by the looks of it - was perfectly aligned. Everything was color coordinated, and the couches, table, TV, and whatever other shit was here, were perfectly in place. Nothing was in a bad angle, nothing was lopsided, it was all exact, definite. There wasn't even a speck of dirt, or a molecule of dust.

Okay, either these people loved their house _a lot, _or they had some OCD issues they needed to work out.

"Bella?" Renee's familiar voice called.

It was kind of awkward saying Renee instead of Bella's mom, but I didn't really care.

Renee came in from a doorway, and from over here it looked like it was the kitchen. She smoothed her dark hair, then eyed me uneasily.

"What's going on?" she asked, returning her eyes to Bella.

"Uh, mom, Edward is staying over for the night."

Her mom's eyes widened, and she eyed me like I was an insect.

"Bella, we never discussed this," she said quietly.

I waved my hand. "Hey, I'm still in the room, you know?"

She glared at me venomously, her teeth barred.

"Yes, I couldn't forget you. Your stench is still wafting around my entryway," she spat, her eyes like chocolate daggers.

I lifted up my arm, then smelt my pit. I shrugged. "Smells fine to me."

Bella giggled, and her mom glared at her.

"Bella can we speak in the other room please?" she asked in a frighteningly calm manner.

Bella sighed, then handed me her towel.

I stood there, holding her wet towel, watching as Bella and her mother walked back into the kitchen.

"What are you thinking?" Renee's muffled voice hissed. "Do you think this is a free for all? You can't bring _him _in here whenever you feel like it."

"Dad said I could," Bella contradicted.

"Yes, well, do I look like your father?" she asked.

There was silence.

"He cannot stay," her mom said firmly. "That boy - no, _adult - _needs to get his own home. Does he even have a job or home?!"

"I don't know!" Bella whispered in a high-pitched voice.

"If you're in love with him, shouldn't you know?"

I felt like smacking something. Her mom was treating me like the dirt on the bottom of her shoes - if she even had any dirt there. It's not like I had ever hurt Bella before. What had I done that put me on her bad side so much? I looked around the room, when it suddenly hit me.

This wasn't about me "hurting Bella" as she falsely said before. No, this was about…money. I was poor, and Bella…wasn't. She wanted someone who could support Bella without having to support a big stack of pizza boxes in his arms as well.

Maybe she was right. Maybe I _was _no good.

Hell, I'd known that for awhile now. I had always been telling myself that I wasn't right. But, my mind would always over look that shit, and go back to how happy I was when I was with Bella, and how happy she was with me.

I could hear both Bella and her mom screaming, but it was just an annoying buzzing in the background. Voices kept running through my mind: Frank's, my own, Renee's…

I let the towel fall from my hands as I robotically turned to the door, then started walking away, back down the path, leaving.

Bella POV

"Do you think I care mom!" I yelled.

"You should care! Sometimes, love isn't the only thing that matters, Bella. What about security, school, money-"

"Wait," I hissed through clenched teeth, cutting her off. "This is all about _money, _isn't it?" I growled. I clenched my hands into fists at my sides.

My mom stuck her chin up, trying to stay firm.

"Yes, it is," she said.

I screamed at the top of my lungs.

My mom held her ears at the sound, wincing.

I smashed the glass plate that was next to me onto the floor. I started laughing now, a little hysterical.

"You don't get it, mom," I laughed, shaking my head. I was so…fucking frustrated - as Edward would say. "Love has nothing to do with that stuff. Sometimes, your love for someone overpowers everything else." I took a step away from her, kicking a piece of glass with my foot. "This-", I gestured at myself, then to the closed kitchen door, where Edward was, "is something you'll never have, because you're too arrogant and bigheaded to see past the money that is lined around your bed to see anything else." I ran from the room, not letting her say anything else.

When I came into the living room, it was empty.

I looked down at the doorway, and the towel lay there, crumpled and wet. I quickly yanked the door open, my eyes widening as I saw Edward leaving.

"Edward!" I called.

He didn't look up. He just kept sluggishly walking to the gate.

I ran to him, gripping his arm firmly in my hand once I got to him. I turned him to me, and his face was lifeless. My brow furrowed as I smoothed the frown lines on his forehead.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

He wasn't looking me in the eye. He stared down at his feet.

"Edward, what the hell is wrong?" I repeated.

"I should go," was all he said. He squirmed out of my arms, then started walking again.

"No, not this time,"I hissed, remembering - remembering!

_He stands up, towering over me. "I _do_ love you," he growls. "Which is why I can't let you do this!" he screams. "You're ruining your life! What, you just want to live with me in a basement forever?!"_

_I start gasping for breath as the sound of sirens comes closer._

"_That's not a fucking life!"_

_They are really close now._

"_Edward, don't do this," I beg._

_He shakes his head. "I have to," he whispers, yanking me from behind the bush and coming to a stop once the police cars stop hastily in front of us._

_The blue and red lights glow across our faces, blinding us._

"_Let her go!" a cop shouts from behind a police car, holding a gun. "Or we'll shoot."_

_He lets go of me, and I feel like I have just been slapped across the face._

"_No, no, no…" I whisper as Edward takes a step away from me. "Edward, please." I am sobbing now._

_A woman grabs me away from him as a cop pulls his arms behind his back, cuffing him._

"_Edward!" I scream at the top of my lungs._

I remembered the night I was forced to leave him. No, he was _not _leaving me again.

I charged over to him, pulling him back roughly.

"No!" I shouted.

He looked down at me, anger and frustration in his eyes.

"I need to go," he said through clenched teeth.

"No you don't!" I spat. "Tell me what's going on, Edward! I'm not letting you leave me again." I felt tears stinging my eyes, and I tried holding them back.

His eyes widened. "You remember that?"

I shook my head. "No changing the subject." I took a deep breath, shutting my eyes. "Tell me why you're leaving," I said.

"Isn't it obvious?" he said, laughing harshly.

I had never seen him act like this. He was smiling in a way I had never seen before. It wasn't a happy smile; it was more of a grimace.

"Your mom is right, Bella," he said. He threw his hands up in exasperation, taking a step away from me. "Look at me."

I looked him up and down. What was he getting on about?

"And look at you!" He pointed at me.

I looked down at myself, confused.

"Am I supposed to understand what's going on?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

He groaned, then grabbed both my wrists in his hands, yanking me extremely close to his chest.

I took in a shuddering breath.

"I'm a dirt ball, and you're a fucking princess. Do you see what's wrong now?!" he yelled.

I flinched from his voice.

He was actually letting my mom's words get to him.

"Don't-don't let my mom's words get to you," I tried to say in a strong voice, but it came out as more of a plea.

He shook his head, that disturbing smile back on his face.

"It's not just your mom! It's Frank, people at your school, _me_!"

I shook my head. "Do you think I care about what they think?!" I was mad now that he'd think anyone else's opinions about him mattered to me. "I don't care at all! All I care about is you and me, and how we feel about each other!"

He was silent, slightly shaking from his anger.

I took a step forward, poking his chest.

"What about you?" I questioned, furious. "If people said I was no good for you, would you leave me without a word?"

"It's not the same-"

"How?!" I interrupted.

He was silent.

"How?!" I demanded, smacking his chest.

He grabbed my arms. "Stop fucking hitting me! I can't think!"

I kicked him in the shin defiantly.

He growled, then yanked my lips to his.

I hopped onto his waist, yanking him closer to me. He held me up, tumbling into a tree. My back smacked into the trunk of the tree, but I didn't care. I yanked on his wet hair, kissing him like a wild animal.

No, this wasn't right. I was mad, and so was he. I needed to stop this before it went too far.

I shoved against his chest, and he pulled back a little, his mouth by my ear.

"What, you don't want me?" he asked huskily.

"Not right now," I replied, my voice even - surprisingly.

He pulled back fully, a scowl on his face. "Why not?"

"Because this isn't a good time."

He sighed angrily, then plopped down onto the ground.

There was a chill in the air, and I could feel the upcoming rain in the atmosphere. I looked up at the sky, and it wasn't midnight blue like it had been for pretty much the whole summer. It was a grayish, dark blue; rain.

"It's going to rain," I told him quietly. "Why don't we go inside?"

He yanked at his hair, sitting Indian style in front of me where I stood, my back still pressed up against the tree trunk.

"Because I don't think I'm welcome."

I sighed, then kneeled down in front of him. "Edward, when are you going to understand that I don't give one shit what my mom thinks?"

He looked up at me, his eyes sad. "But she's right," he said.

I put my hands on either side of his face, forcing him to stare me in the eyes. "I love you," I said firmly.

He tried to look down, but I captured his gaze again.

"Isn't that enough?" I asked, my voice a girly squeak of pain.

Maybe it wasn't about any of this. Maybe he just didn't want _me _and was trying to be nice about it. If this was the case, I wanted him to get the balls to just say it, not keep me waiting for him.

"Is this really…" I trailed off, my throat painfully constricting around my words. I cleared my throat, trying again. "Is this really about my mom and money?" I asked quietly.

He looked up, his face dark and desolate. "What else would it be about?"

I let go of his face, then stood up. I could feel a few drops of rain coming down. They were cold, and added to the freezing temperature of my hair from the swim. My clothes were getting soaked from the rain, and from my bathing suit underneath it.

"I don't care about that stuff. God damn it, Edward! What kind of person was I that you'd think that material possessions would sway how I feel about you?!" I yelled, my anger fuming.

He stood up, too, now towering over me.

I didn't lose my nerve, though. I kept my position; feet firmly planted on the ground, back straight, head up, chest heaving. He wasn't going to convince me anything. I knew what I wanted.

"I know you don't, but maybe I do," he said. "I mean, you want to be with me forever, right?" he asked.

I nodded.

"Well, how do you think I can pay for us both later on? My job is a fucking pizza delivery guy!" He threw his hands in the air in aggravation. He began pacing across the wet grass. I watched as the rain came down harder now, sheeting down in fresh torrents on my head, like a faucet turned on high. It reminded me of when I was little, and my mother used to wash me in the tub. She'd use a bucket to wet my hair, just pouring it carelessly on my head, letting it dribble in my eyes and mouth.

"We'll find a way," I said calmly. "I'll have a job, too. And Edward, you could better yourself. You're smart, you could go back to school."

He seemed to be thinking, his mind in a different place. "So you don't care?" he asked. "You don't care that I am a pizza delivery guy, and that we'll be poor losers?"

I laughed, shaking my head. "We won't be 'poor losers'."

He sighed, then pulled me to his chest. "I'm sorry," he said. "It's just, people get to me after awhile, you know? Everyone's telling me I'm not good enough, or I'm not smart enough…"

"Maybe not to them you aren't, but to me you're perfect."

He rolled his eyes. "Yeah, perfect." He snorted.

There was a clash of thunder, and I jumped in his arms from the sound.

"I better be going," he mumbled. He turned away, but I pulled his arm. He turned to look at me, raising an eyebrow.

"You'll come tonight, won't you?"

He grinned. "Where else would I go?" With that, he turned and left.

* * *

**Reviews for long chapters and Edwards in the rain! he he :**)


	19. Eyes On Fire

Chapter 19

Edward POV

_"It will be okay, Edward,"_ Bella had said.

I remembered her comforting words as I got ready to go to Bella's house for dinner. She assured me over and over that it would be fine. It wasn't her father I was worried about like any normal teenage guy who's dating their daughter would be. No, I was afraid of Bella's fucking mom.

Renee hated me. No, that wasn't a strong enough word. Renee wanted to castrate me, then push me off a cliff that fell into a pit of lava. Yup, that summed it up. I'm sure she dreamt of doing that to me.

I was wearing the nicest shirt I could uncover from the few articles of clothing I had and dirty ass jeans. I was now living with my boss, the owner of the pizza place where I worked.

Yeah, I had an awesome life…

He was a really nice guy. He gave me food, a shower, and a place to crash whenever I needed it. His name was Emmett McCarty, my savior. At least if Bella's parents asked if I had a home, I only had to lie half-way. I did have a place to sleep when I needed it. I wasn't paying to live there or anything, but…whatever.

It still counted, I decided stubbornly.

So as I walked down the street, heading to Bella's, I let my pathetic, childish fears take me over.

What if I embarrassed myself like a little loser? What if they banned me from seeing Bella? What the hell would I do then?

God, I needed to stop worrying like a little pansy. I was becoming a fucking girl…

It was seven at night, and dusk was coming. The sun was on the horizon, peeking subtly through the many, full trees on this street full of humungous houses. Bella's house was the biggest, though - of course.

I fixed my shirt, staring at the giant, front gate.

How the hell was I supposed to get in? I didn't know the password, or anything.

"Hello?" someone said in a robotic voice, making me jump.

I looked around, searching for who had spoken.

"Are you Edward Masen?" the weird voice asked again.

I looked down, finally realizing where the voice was coming from. There was an intercom resting on a waterproof pad attached to the gates.

"Press the button, then speak," the person who sounded like a woman sighed, annoyed. I guess she did this a lot.

I cleared my throat, then held my pointer finger down on the red button.

"Uh, yeah, I'm Edward. I'm here for dinner-"

The gates made a buzzing sound, then they slowly opened.

"You may proceed," the woman said in that same, bored tone.

I pushed through the gates. I walked up the perfectly bricked pathway to their wooden door, biting my lip. I raised my fist to knock on the door, but before I could, it was pulled open. I looked down to see a short woman that looked like she was the same race as the man who was cutting the hedges standing there. She was very small, short and thin. Her hair was a shiny black, pulled into a messy bun. Her skin was an olive tone, with a red under tone. Her eyes were small and dark, almost onyx.

"Um, hi," I greeted her awkwardly.

"I'm Rita," she said in a squeaky voice, "and I will be your host for tonight."

I raised an eyebrow. "Shouldn't the owners of the house be the hosts?"

She just shrugged then moved over to let me through.

The house looked the same, except maybe even cleaner.

"This way," Rita instructed, motioning for me to follow her through a doorway to the left of the room.

I followed her, then was greeted by a very ostentatious-looking dining room. There was a long, mahogany table in the center of the room, with dishes and glasses and silverware adorning it the whole length it went. There were four chairs. Two chairs were for Bella's parents, one for her…and one for me.

I gulped, pulling at my dangly hair in unease.

"Mr. and Mrs. Swan will be here shortly," Rita said in a professional tone.

"When did you start working here?" I asked, cocking my head to the side. I had never seen or heard of this lady before.

"Just yesterday, sir. They hired me to only work for tonight's dinner. It's supposed to be a big deal." She smiled shyly, then left the room, scurrying like a scared dog.

I sighed, then leaned against the wall.

Okay, so this was going to be bad. Bad didn't cover it. This was going to be scary as hell. I was never one who was frightened easily. I'd had guns held to my temple, knives pressed to my throat, and yet none of that scared me.

Nothing could scare me more than anything that could have Bella taken away from me.

"Edward?"

I looked up to see Bella standing in the doorway Rita had just left from.

Bella looked gorgeous, as she always did. Her hair hung loosely down to her waist. She wore a knee length blue dress that hugged her from the waist up, then fanned out from her waist out, almost like a bell. She was dressed so simply, and yet she looked purely inhuman.

I seriously needed to start reading porno or something. God.

"You look beautiful," I whispered, appraising her yet again.

She smiled, a blush coloring her cheeks. "Thanks," she said. She reached out and took my hand, smiling as I pulled her to my chest.

I kissed her chastely, afraid one of her parents may pop out of nowhere. "And that color looks amazing on you…"

She snorted, ignoring my comment. "Well, this is strange."

"What is?"

"You," she said. She fingered the cuff of my button down shirt, smiling slightly. "Not just your clothes, but you. You're acting very strange."

I laughed nervously, rubbing the back of my neck with my hand. "Well, I'm pretty much shitting a cheese grater. I'm so fucking nervous."

"Hmm, big, tough Edward is afraid of the Swans…" she murmured.

I rolled my eyes. "I'm not afraid," I lied.

Now she rolled her eyes.

Bella's parents came in then. Her father was wearing a suit, and her mother wore a dress similar to Bella's, except longer, and a reddish, burgundy color.

"Hello, Edward," Bella's father said enthusiastically. It kind of surprised me.

"Hello, sir."

"Please, call me Charlie." He smiled nicely.

I nodded.

"Let's sit," Bella whispered in my ear.

We sat at the table, and I took a deep breath. So the awkwardness would now commence…

Bella POV

Well, dinner was almost over, and it went…horribly. Edward knocked over one of my mom's most precious wine glasses.

I internally rolled my eyes.

He also dropped sauce on the white carpet. Then, he burped, and that set my mom over the edge. However, my father and I didn't mind one bit. Me especially. It was tense now as we all ate our desserts silently, awkwardly. I decided there needed to be an ice breaker, if there was anything else left to break ever since Edward came in…

I cleared my throat.

Everyone looked up.

"I forgot to tell you, mom and dad," I began.

They just stared at me, waiting.

"I got some memories back, and Edward and I think there may be a way to get them all back."

My dad smiled hugely.

Edward grabbed my hand under the table.

My mother, however, turned red, and glared daggers at Edward and I.

I furrowed my brow, looking around to see if the glare was really directed at us. It was, but I had no idea why.

"Mom, what's wrong?" I asked in confusion.

"Why would you want your memories back?" she asked. She laughed nervously, swirling the food around in her plate. "I mean, you don't need them, right?"

I stared at her as if she had three heads.

Was she serious?

"Mom, why would I not want them back?" I asked, disturbed.

She dropped her fork, making a loud clatter noise. "Because, I was just thinking, maybe you wouldn't want to remember everything that had happened."

"But that makes no sense!" I shouted, throwing down my fork as well.

"Renee, just stop-" my dad began, but my mother cut him off.

"No," she said firmly. The tone she used implied she wasn't budging. "I don't think having Bella's memories back is a good thing."

Edward snorted. "You only think that be-" He jolted in his chair, then screamed, "Ouch! Jesus, woman! What kind of shoes are those?! Platforms?!" He rubbed his calf, wincing.

"Edward, remember we agreed that-"

"No," Edward said, cutting my mom off. "You forced me into not telling Bella."

I stood from the table, annoyed. "Wait! What the hell is going on?!" I shouted.

Everyone fell silent.

"Is there something I don't know?" I asked, raising an eyebrow.

Edward mumbled something I couldn't hear, earning another kick from my mom.

"I deserve to know if it's about me," I said between clenched teeth.

My dad sighed. "Looks like you're going to have to tell her, Renee."

My mom shook her head.

"Fine, if you won't tell me, then Edward will." I looked down at Edward, waiting for him to tell me.

"Uh, um, well…you see…" And that was all I got.

"So no one is going to tell me?!" I screamed.

Silence.

"What could possibly be so bad that-"

"Your mom is the fucking reason why you lost your memory, all right?" Edward finally hissed.

My mouth fell open.

I looked at my mom, but she was staring down at her plate.

"Mom…? Wait, I-I don't under-"

"She shoved you into the counter, and you smacked your head," Edward said. "Then, you lost all your memory." He looked up at my mother, glaring daggers at her. "And mommy dearest wanted to keep you in the dark, so you'd like her."

I couldn't believe anything I had just heard. I didn't understand. My mom would never…. Would she? But why?

"Mom…why…" I trailed off, stunned into silence. My tongue felt like it had been cut off. My brain felt like it had been disconnected from my spinal cord. I didn't know what to do.

"You…called me a bitch," she muttered.

My eyes went into slits. "So that gives you a right to basically rip a whole section of my life from me?!"

She was silent.

"I hope you're happy mom, because I fucking hate you."

I threw my napkin from my lap, onto the table. I ran to my room, tears streaming down my cheeks. My mom had done this to me! I had lost my memory. So I didn't hit my head and pass out, and the kidnapper had found me. That was the story my parents had told me.

Lies.

I couldn't believe they would keep something so…extreme from me. I mean, after all, it was about me. If I was my mom, I would tell. It was unfair. This whole time, they lied to me.

I didn't know where to go. I stood in the entryway, shifting my eyes from the dining room door and the front door, leading out of the house. I didn't want to stay here. There seemed to be a strong, demanding pull that was slowly yanking me towards the front door. My body urged my mind to just move my feet already. I willingly obliged, then headed out the door, into the summer night.

I shoved the gates open, sprinting down the street, going somewhere unknown to myself. I kicked my high heels off while running, and yanked the little clips that were lodged on my head out of my wavy hair. My feet burned pleasantly as they smacked loudly against the concrete. The light from the moon made my skin a shockingly bright, white color. It made everything else look black and white, and that spurred me on.

I liked the feel of running - stretching my legs out, heating my muscles. The muscles in my legs stung as they were driven faster and faster by my thoughtless mind. I wasn't thinking anything. The only thing I could think of was to run.

Get away from here, the voice in my head hissed. Run. Far.

I did as it said. I ran down the path Edward and I had been walking on yesterday to get to the docks, the pathway I had been kidnapped on. This path was very familiar, very important. I knew it was, and I knew why. I just couldn't remember anything that had happened on here.

I looked at each rock, pebble, grain of dirt and sand, plant, and bug that I saw. I analyzed everything to make sure my brain got the message, that my brain might do that weird, remembering thing it had done those other two times.

However, nothing happened. My mind stayed utterly black. The pulse behind my ears was extremely loud, annoyingly so from running. My breaths were shooting out loudly. I could only here me as I stood in the middle of the country-like road.

I began running again, somewhere. I went down the path, finally leaving it behind me. I passed the school, and I passed a park. I passed a big lake, the same one from yesterday, except at a different angle, and I passed by a junk yard. None of these things mattered to me. My mind was guiding me somewhere, somewhere that I had been. I didn't question the strange wisdom my mind was suddenly having, driven by anger, I just went along with it.

Finally, after about an hour of running, I was there. This place. I knew it.

Edward POV

I followed the trail of shoes and hair clips. Jesus, there were at least sixty hair clips scattered across the streets. I went down the pathway Bella had been kidnapped on, staring down at the ground for more traces of where she had ran to.

Oh god, I was going insane, talking to myself. My memories drifted back to the night Bella and I had snuck out and went to my willow tree. We came home late, and James tried to attack her. So, like an idiot, I tried to protect her, and almost got myself, and her killed. I told her to run, but she came back, because she loved me.

I was by the school where I was sure Bella went to, passing by a park. I knew where this road led to. I didn't think twice. I ran to the place that was like Hell. It was the place we had met, the place where we were united. The place where we fell in love, strange as it may be.

I stopped mid-run when I saw her, sitting on the porch steps of Frank's old house. The house was desolate, with yellow strips of plastic saying in bold, black font: DO NOT ENTER.

Bella was looking around, that seem crease between her eyebrows that I knew she got when she was thinking hard. Her little hands were balled into fists as her eyes shifted quickly around the house. Her chocolate brown eyes were like security cameras, sweeping the area.

"What are you doing here?" I asked as I walked over.

She looked startled as she met my gaze. Strands of her hair were clinging to her face from crying. Her eyes were red rimmed, and she had a sheen of tears on her cheeks.

"I've been here," she noted. "I know it."

I nodded, sitting next to her on the three step porch.

"You have," I told her.

She scrunched up her forehead again, looking around at everything.

"I can't remember," she whispered, defeated. "I tried, but nothing is happening. It's not like those other two times. Nothing is coming to me. It's just blank."

I shrugged. "You'll remember someday."

She shook her head. "That's what everyone is saying, but nothing has happened," she spat. "How long is 'someday'? A year? A decade?!"

"Just calm the fuck down," I laughed. "We'll go to that doctor, despite what your mom said, and you'll find out what can be done."

She glared at her hands, her teeth barred.

"I'm not going home. I refuse to."

"Where are you going to go, then?" I asked.

She looked up at me, a blush forming slightly, but vanishing quickly.

"Can I live with you for awhile?" she asked quietly.

Oh shit. I didn't want to sound like a weenie, but I was kind of embarrassed to bring Bella to Emmett's place, across the street from where I worked. Would she think I was a loser?

Probably, I decided.

But Bella did always surprise me, so maybe she would surprise me again.

I looked back up at her, nervous. "If I do, I have to warn you, this place is nothing like your house."

She nodded. "I don't care," she said. "As long as it's far away from her," she hissed venomously.

I sighed, standing up. "Okay, then. Let's get going." I held out my hand to her and she took it.

"Edward?" she whispered.

"What?"

"What is this place," she said, nodding her head behind her to the house and the surrounding trailer homes. "That house seems very important to me…" She glared at the ground. "Well, it was," she mumbled, peeved.

Well, I had told her everything. Might as well tell her this.

"It was James' house," I explained. "The weirdo that kidnapped you…and me."

Her mouth formed a little O of realization. "Wait…" she gasped. "The nightmare…that was him!" She was having an epiphany, I guessed.

"You've been having nightmares?" I asked.

She nodded. "Only once it was with…James." She looked back at the house. "We were inside the house."

"Why the fuck didn't you tell me you were having nightmares?" I asked, pissed.

"Because it was only one, and you were there when I woke up from it, so…"

"So that's why you were crying," I realized.

She nodded. "He was disturbing. I still wish I could remember, though. It's like having all the puzzle pieces, but not knowing where they go." She groaned in frustration.

"Well, if the doctors know a way to fix you, soon your little puzzle will be all fixed."

She smiled and laughed. "Yeah, I hope so."

Bella POV

"Welcome…uh, to my…house," Edward muttered. He shoved his shoulder into the door, budging it open. It opened with a grating sound, too big for the width of the doorway.

Edward and I walked into a room - a living room by the looks of it. The floor was fully carpeted. The carpet was white, with many different colored stains all over it. There was a red, homey-looking couch in the middle of the room, and across from that, a TV with rabbit style antennas.

"This is Emmett's place," he mumbled, scratching the back of his neck with his hand in a nervous gesture.

I turned to look at him, raising an eyebrow. "Who's Emmett?" I asked, cocking my head to the side.

"That would be me," someone said in a boisterous voice.

I turned to the left to see a very burly looking man walking out from a doorway, a beer bottle in his hand. He was extremely tall and muscular. His arms had rolls of muscles, jutting out of the sleeves of the tight, black t-shirt he wore. His hair was a very dark brown, all curled in a cute, boyish way. His eyes were a burnt sienna color.

He chuckled throatily, taking a gulp of his drink. "Is this the girl?" he asked Edward, nodding his bottle over to me.

Edward rolled his eyes. "Please don't, Emmett," he mumbled, embarrassed.

He laughed again, a big smile playing at his lips.

"Aw, come on, Eddy. Don't spoil my fun." He got Edward in a headlock, giving him a noogie.

They reminded me of brothers, chuckling and hitting each other playfully. It made my heart clench in happiness to see Edward so lighthearted. It made me happy, seeing him without anything to worry about like most of the time.

"Jeez," Edward laughed, smacking at Emmett's chest. "I think I just lost 100 brain cells." Edward rubbed the top of his head, his long hair falling into his eyes.

Emmett chuckled. "So…" he drawled, walking over to me. "You're Bella? The Bella Swan?" he laughed.

Edward wiped his hand across his face, exhaling loudly through clenched teeth.

I eyed Edward with a smirk on my face. Obviously he had been saying something about me to Emmett

"I don't know," I murmured, smiling. "It depends on what he said; good or bad?" I asked Emmett.

He grinned, his smile stretching his face out. "Good things." He looked over at Edward, chuckling. "He hasn't shut up about you ever since he got here."

I smiled happily as I looked up at Edward who was glaring daggers at Emmett.

"Really?" I asked, grinning goofily.

He nodded. "Hell yeah! He always says how smart, and beautiful, and talented, and that you're an awesome kiss-"

"Okay!" Edward shouted. "That's enough." His eyes were in slits as he glared at Emmett. "I just wanted you to know that Bella will be staying with us for awhile, Em," he said in a forced calm tone.

He grinned then winked. "You two have fun."

Edward groaned, then pulled me out of the room.

We were in a bedroom. The room was small, the size of my mom's walk in closet. The room looked just the same as the other one we were just in, but it was way cleaner. I saw stacks of books on the little nightstand next to the twin sized bed.

I walked over and picked one up. The books were tattered, worn away from over use. I had heard of all these titles, but had never read them. Not that I recalled.

Romeo and Juliet, Wuthering Heights, Pride and Prejudice.

They were all the classic romance novels I had always wanted to read.

"These are yours?" I asked, holding up Romeo and Juliet.

He smiled sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

"Yeah. We have talked about those," he told me, sitting down on the bed against the wall. "You told me you'd always wanted to read those books."

I held the books in my hands, turning them over and over, looking at each word and rip on the book in fascination. I loved the smell of old books, like most people loved the smell of new cars. It was a smell of comfort to me, if that made sense.

"I think I remember," I stated.

He came up behind me, winding his arms around my waist, and pulling me to him.

"Good," he murmured in my ear. He nuzzled his nose against my neck, making my breathing hitch.

I dropped the book as shivers of pleasure rolled through my body - from my head down to my toes. I swiped my fingers slowly across his forearms, giving him goose bumps. I smiled vindictively.

"This is your room?" I said, trying to ignore the yearning my body was throwing at my brain; the yearning to turn around and ravish Edward with kisses.

"Yeah," he said, his voice shaky. He could feel this, too.

I gave in to my body, turning to face him. My eyes never left my hand as I slid it down his black t-shirt. I could hear him breathing heavily, his warm breath fanning out around my nose. He smelled amazing.

"Emmett did say have fun…" I trailed off. He would understand.

His heavy breaths stopped, and he grabbed my hand. "Bella?" he whispered.

I looked up at him.

Embarrassment washed through me. He didn't want me, not like I did. He didn't want what I was throwing out to him: Me. Everything that was me, I just gladly set in his hands. He could do whatever he wanted with me. It was the truth, and that wasn't good. However, I couldn't control what my body was telling me to do by instinct. This was how it was.

"What?" I whispered, my eyes moving back down to his hand wrapped firmly around mine.

"We don't have to do anything," he told me. "Em…was just joking. You don't really think I wanted you to…" he trailed off. Thank God.

I could feel the blush burning my cheeks. This was not something I wanted to talk about.

"No," I said, my eyes meeting his again. "It's not that. I just…I wantto. I want you." I bit my lip, moving my eyes to the book that was now on the ground.

"I…"

Say something! I hissed internally. Save me from this embarrassment.

"I want to, too," he finally murmured. He put his pointer finger under my chin, tilting my face back up to meet his gaze. "It's just, you're too young."

I was about to protest, but he was too quick. He covered my mouth with the hand that was once holding mine. My freed hand felt oddly cold without his warm grip around it.

"You are young, Bella. I'm an adult, and you're still a kid."

I shook my head. "It's only a three year difference. My parents are five years apart - it doesn't matter to them, and it doesn't matter to me."

"But it does to me," he continued, ignoring my seemingly meaningless words. "It would feel wrong to me."

I furrowed my brow in confusion.

He rubbed away the crease that I knew was between my eyebrows.

"You, know," Edward began, staring at the crease as he smoothed it away, "doing that will give you wrinkles."

I rolled my eyes, smacking his arm.

"But I wouldn't care," he continued. "You could be as wrinkly as a raisin and I wouldn't give two shits." He grinned down at me.

I smiled back toothily.

Ah, how I loved him.

"I love you," I said aloud, resting my head on his shoulder.

He wrapped his arms back around my waist.

"I love you, too," he whispered into my wavy hair, "no matter how dysfunctional this is."

* * *

**They did NOT have sex. Just to clear it up. :P **

**REVIEWS, REVIEWS, REVIEWS.**


	20. Forever

Chapter 20

Edward POV

The ringing woke me up. It was one of Emmett's phones ringing.

I glanced over at the little nightstand next to my bed to see the phone lighting up in the cradle. I looked at the alarm clock next to it, and on it, the number two and the letters A and M were glowing in neon green.

Who the hell was calling me this early?!

I picked the phone up, holding the phone to my ear drowsily.

"Whoever the fuck this is, is going to get a beat down once I'm fully conscious."

I heard a female gasp. "Excuse me, but this is Bella's mother."

_Crap. _

I had forgotten about Bella's parents. When Bella ran away from her house, we went straight to…"my house". We never even told her parents. Well, serves her mom right. That's what she gets.

"That's nice," I mumbled, shutting my eyes and turning over in the bed so I could stare at Bella's sleeping form.

She breathed deeply and evenly, her eyes shut. She slept with a little smile on her face, wearing my pajamas. That was my idea. For some reason, it made me feel better, like she was _mine. _It was like I was an animal, staking a claim on her.

"How can you be so rude, Mr. Daniels?" Molly asked in her annoying, proper voice.

"How the hell can you be awake at two in the morning?" I countered, whispering so Bella wouldn't wake up.

"I haven't been sleeping!" she screamed. I had to pull the phone away from my ear, scrunching my face up as her irritating voice blew out from the phone. "I have been worried sick! I figured she was with _you, _and then I had to go all Sherlock Holmes and find out where you're living!"

I laughed. "Ha, Sherlock Holmes…"

"Shut up!" she hissed. "How my daughter could love such an immature, poor-"

"I'm about to hang up," I said, interrupting her.

She sighed. "I just want to know if my daughter is all right," she said in a quieter voice - thank God.

"Not fully," I whispered. "Because of you."

There was silence.

Bella shuffled in the bed, humming in her sleep. My arm was still wrapped tightly around her waist, and I pulled her to me, snuggling my nose in her neck.

"Tell her tomorrow…that I'm sorry," she finally whispered.

"I don't really think sorry is going to be enough," I whispered back, staring down at Bella's face. It was finally calm. No stress, no worries, just pleasantly blissful sleep was on her mind now.

"And tell her 'okay'."

"Okay what?"

"Tell her…she can go see a doctor, do whatever it takes to get her memories back."

I smiled. "Really? You'd do that for her - for me?" I asked, still smiling hugely.

"For you?" she repeated.

"Yeah," I said happily, still smiling.

"How would this be for _you_?" she asked.

I sighed. "When are you going to get it, Renee?" I said in a whisper, never taking my eyes off Bella.

"Don't call me Renee."

"I love Bella," I said, ignoring her. "She loves me. I'd do anything for her, and she'd probably do the same - for whatever reason. I'm going to protect her from anything and everything - including you. I'm going to stay with her until she doesn't ever want to see me again. And if that day doesn't come, then get used to it Mrs. Swan, because I'm going to be around for a long time. _Nothing _can make me leave her. Not James, not the cops, and especially not you."

There was silence, and I started to drift off to sleep. My eyes were shut, the phone still pressed limply against my face.

"I know," she finally said. "And…that's what scares me the most."

"Why?" I mumbled sleepily. "Why is her and I loving each other such a horrible thing to you?"

"Because, I know how it feels. I…I had someone like you, too. I was sixteen, and I was in love. We loved each other, I thought. He was much like you." I heard her laugh. The laugh was lighthearted, as if her thoughts were in a distant place. "But one day, he left me. He said that he couldn't be with me anymore. He said he had to move away. I asked him to write me, and he said he would. But, he never did.

"So I went to the place where he said he went. I found him, and…he was with another girl. It had been two years, and he was married, and living in a home with another woman."

I was now wide awake, listening to her story.

"I never even talked to him; I was too scared. I felt betrayed, heartbroken, disgusting, unwanted. I felt like garbage, like I was nothing to him.

"To this day," she continued, "I still don't know why he left me. To this day, I still love him, and he doesn't love me." She sighed, and I could hear tears in her voice as she began to speak again. "I don't think I will ever be able to stop loving him."

She stopped, and I couldn't speak. I didn't know what to say. I felt bad for Bella's mom, for the first time since I've met her. I now knew why she was like this today.

"But I won't ever do that to her," I finally said, finding my voice.

"That's what you say now," she whispered. "Things change."

"Not for me. I know what I want, I don't second guess that, or change how I stand. You can trust me."

There was silence, the only sound was Bella's even breathing as she slept soundly against my chest. Her fist was still clinging tightly around my T-shirt.

"I guess I can't do anything, because if I could go back, I wouldn't want my mom to ruin the things that I had."

"I promise, Mrs. Swan. I won't ever hurt her. If I do, I give you permission to kill me."

She laughed, and I could hear the tears in her voice.

"You're good, Edward," she murmured. "Please…take good care of her."

I nodded. "I will, for forever."

"And don't forget to tell her what I told you."

"I won't."

"Good night," she whispered.

"Night."

I then hung up the phone, smiling. Finally, there was peace. And _finally, _I could get some fucking sleep.

Bella POV

I rolled around in a pair of arms that were extremely familiar to me. I brushed my fingers against the large biceps, felt the indent of each scar. I knew it was Edward. I might've forgotten a lot of things, but I could never forget the feel of his strong arms around me.

Before Edward came back into my life, I would dream of him every night. That was before he had explained everything to me. The dreams just made me fall in love with him, and then that day that I actually saw him was so surreal to me. And now I had him. He finally had me, too. We'd never have to be apart ever again, and I could make new memories with Edward, since my mom wouldn't let me get my old ones back, or try to.

I guess this would be good, but our relationship would never be as it had been. How could it if I was missing everything that basically made us how we were today?

I could feel warmth on my face. This was normal, considering that it was August. I squirmed around, trying to shield my face from the heat pounding down on it. My eyelids were red and squeezed shut tightly. I could feel Edward's arms tighten around me, and a sleepy smile crept up, and onto my lips. It was beyond my control. Edward always made me feel happy.

"Morning," I muttered, rubbing at my eyes tiredly.

"Morning," Edward replied in a voice that was strained, like he was holding something back.

I peeked one eye open, looking up at him.

He was just grinning hugely, staring down at me.

I raised an eyebrow. "Uh, why are you so happy? It's morning," I groaned, rolling over in his arms again, trying to loosen up my joints.

"Because I have great news," he said, some of the excitement he had been hiding now seeping into his voice.

I sat up, pushing my bush of hair behind my shoulders. "What is it?" I asked once I was situated.

He took a deep breath, then sat up, too. He held my hand in his, playing with my fingers.

"Well, you know how your mom was a real bitch, and wouldn't let you get the surgery?" he reminded me.

I nodded, my jaw clenched in anger.

How my mom could be so…heartless, was beyond me.

"I know why she was acting like that," he said, smiling again. He reminded me of a child that had a secret that he wasn't supposed to tell, and that was important, and felt all excited and proud that he got to know before anyone else. _I _felt like that kid who's whining, "Tell me!"

"Tell me," I said aloud.

He didn't hesitate to tell his little secret. "Okay, so your mom was in love with some dude just like us. But one day, he left her and shit, and then she went to find him after he didn't write her, and she saw him with another woman."

My mouth fell open.

"So, basically, this whole time your mom was just trying to protect you…from me." He frowned, staring at our conjoined hands. "Which I think is really retarded," he carried on, "I mean, she's trying to protect you from _nothing. I _would never hurt you, but she did."

I just stared at him.

"Don't be so hard on your mom," he whispered. "You might not remember…how it feels to have someone taken from you, but I do. And trust me, it's no walk in the park. You're lucky you don't have to remember that." He glared at the bed sheets.

"I'd rather remember something than be left in the dark," I murmured. "I also don't have the feeling of having my very first kiss with you," I whispered. "To get back all the good memories, you have to get the bad, too, and I'm willing to do that."

He smiled sadly at me, kissing my forehead. "But I'm not finished," he murmured against my skin. "There's more."

I pulled back, my brow furrowed. "What more could she tell you?"

He had that same, "I know and you don't!" grin on his face.

"She said…"

I smacked his arm.

"Ouch!" he gasped in fake pain. "That hurt!"

I rolled my eyes. "Just say it, Edward."

"Okay, jeez." He cleared his throat. "She said that you can get the surgery. She said you can do whatever it takes to get your memories back."

My eyes widened, my mouth fell agape. My heart swelled, my eyes were clouded with tears of joy.

This would change everything. I'd remember everything - well, maybe not everything, but the closest I could get. All the things that happened to Edward and me would return. My little puzzle would be complete!

I jumped into Edward's arms.

"Whoa," he said as we tumbled onto the floor.

I hugged him tightly, kissing his face.

He just laughed, smoothing down my hair.

Emmett came in then, smiling. "Isn't it kind of early for things like _this _in the morning?" Emmett asked, raising his eyebrows suggestively.

Not even his crude, and embarrassing comments could ruin my mood right now.

Edward, however, wasn't as sidetracked as I was.

"Buzz off, asshole! Don't you see that we're having a moment here?"

Emmett just laughed, leaving the room.

I continued hugging and kissing him, laughing happily.

"Edward, Edward! Do you know what this means?!" I screamed excitedly. My insides were all bubbly, full of excitement.

"Uh…um, I think so. Well, at least I thought I did," he stuttered unintelligibly from my excitement.

"It means everything can go back, Edward! All of it. We could be just like we used to - how it's supposed to be. You, and me, forever." I yanked his lips to mine. They molded perfectly, like we were made for each other.

He pulled back, his warm breaths fanning out on my face.

"Forever." He nodded, pulling his lips back to mine.

_Me and Edward forever, how it was supposed to be…_

* * *

**Sorry for the long wait, and the short chapter, but it did reveal some stuff :)**

**Review!**


	21. The Onslaught

Chapter 21: The Onslaught

We were here. We had made it.

Edward and I were now sitting in Dr. Brooks' office, waiting for him to give us the results. He had done a cat scan of my head, looking at the damage that was still there, and how it healed, and what to classify my injury since the day I found out I lost my memory I didn't want to know. I just wanted to leave. However, today, I needed to know. If I didn't know how bad the damage was, or how much memory I could gain, then there would be no hope.

I was practically bouncing in the chair, biting my lip.

"Jeez, Bella, calm down," Edward mumbled for the hundredth time.

Edward was sitting right next to me in one of the two chairs in front of Dr. Brooks' large desk. My parents were out in the waiting room, and they were going to come in after Edward and I found out what was going on, and what could be done to treat whatever degree of injury I had.

"I can't 'calm down'," I hissed, staring at the green colored walls. The green reminded me of mint, or maybe being sick. Kind of a bad choice of color for a place where you were trying to get _better._

"Well, try," Edward said simply.

I did as he instructed. I took deep breaths, trying to stop my jittering movements. It didn't work. There was no way for me to calm down.

When Dr. Brooks came in with my cat scan results, they would determine how the rest of my life worked out. It would determine how I would feel about Edward and I being together. Edward said he knew how it felt to have someone taken away from him. From the little, clouded memory I had, I knew he was talking about when he turned himself in, and we were separated. Was that pain still present in me before? Would this change how I felt about everything? Was I mad at Edward, and would this change how I felt about him _now_?

The truth was, life was complicated. Nothing could ever go perfectly right for awhile, and even if it didn't, eventually one little thing would ruin it. Like when I was little, and for my sixth birthday my mom bought me a pair of shiny, black Mary Jane shoes. I was so happy, and I was keeping them perfectly clean for so long, but then, it was raining, and I stepped in a giant puddle of mud.

Not even stupid shoes could stay perfect, so how could this? Right now, to me, everything I had with Edward was slightly perfect - the scale of our life was _almost _even. Then, if I could be fixed, that would add to the perfect side of the scale, and the good would outweigh the bad for once in my life.

So this was why I couldn't calm down.

Dr. Brooks came in then, holding a big, manila envelope. He smiled kindly at us, not at all perturbed that he basically held my future in his hands. I guess he was just used to doing this. He did do it for a living, after all.

"Hello, Bella, Edward," he greeted us, still smiling.

Edward nodded to him.

"So?" I persisted, sitting forward in my seat. The plastic on the hard cushions of the chair made a loud crackling sound, but I couldn't find the will to care at this point. I needed to know.

"What's wrong with me? Can I get better?" I rambled earnestly.

Dr. Brooks laughed at my intense expression, opening up the folder. He pulled his glasses that were hanging around his neck up to his eyes, then rested them on the bridge of his nose. He scanned the page, as if he already didn't know what it said.

"To calm your nerves, Bella," Dr. Brooks began, "there are ways to get your memories back."

I smiled hugely, my cheeks nearly cracking.

He cleared his throat, clipping an x-ray of my skull, and then one of my brain right next to it onto a board. He then turned on a light, illuminating the x-rays.

"When you…fell, your temporal lobe was damaged," he said, his fingers tracing over the x-ray of my brain. "You obviously know that this fall caused you to have amnesia," he continued. He turned to look at me, waiting for an answer.

I nodded.

"Yes, well, the more accurate term would be retrograde amnesia. Retrograde amnesia means that you lost memories prior to the accident - memories that were recent. It may seem as a dream after the accident, but it wasn't. It was very real."

Edward tightened his grip on my hand.

"Now, these memories could range from about a month," he explained. "So that is why you lost all of those memories." He turned the lights back on, and unclipped the x-rays from the board. "Victims of retrograde amnesia may feel embarrassed or stressed that they no longer remember key people and significant events. Typically the victim may be overwhelmed by the rush of people who seek to reacquaint themselves. It is important to let the victim go at their own pace, so they are not overly stressed." He sounded so bored, as if he had said these words too many times, and knew them word by word. The town wasn't _that _big. "Now, to get your memories back, Bella, it will take a lot of work. You must visit key places, do similar thing-"

"Oh, I know! I've been getting a few memories back," I said excitedly. "I got them from seeing similar images of what happened before the accident."

He looked confused. "Then why are you here?" he asked, cocking his head to the side.

"I…thought maybe there was a surgery I could take, or-"

He laughed, interrupting me.

"No, Bella. There are no surgeries. You are just going to have to keep doing what you're doing. And if the memories come back, then good for you." He stood from his desk, grabbing the papers, then leaving the room. The shutting of the door broke my heart.

It was silent, tears streaming down my face.

There was nothing to jog my memory back faster. We had to "just keep doing what we were doing". How the hell was that supposed to help us?! That would take forever! Why did he even tell us to come down if he knew very well what my situation was now?! He just wasted so much of my time, and practically stomped on the only hope I had left for a full recovery.

Edward POV

It was silent. Bella just sat there, staring straight forward at the puke green walls. I could see the glisten of tears on her cheeks, but she didn't move or blink.

Awkward…

"Bella?" I whispered, sitting up in my chair.

No response.

That doctor had been such a jerk! Bella's dad told him everything that had happened, and yet he told us to come so he could give us some more "help". Help my ass!

I stood from the chair, my fists clenched.

"I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere," I said.

She didn't move or nod, or even acknowledge that I was in the room still.

"Not that you're going anywhere…" I mumbled, turning to the door.

I left the room, going down the halls. I stopped a nurse in her tracks, towering over her. She looked frightened of me, her mud brown eyes going wide as she slowly tilted her head up to look at me.

"Where did Dr. Brooks go?" I asked sharply.

Her hand shook as she pointed to the cafeteria down the hall.

I shoved her out of my way, going into the cafeteria. I was there in no time with my long strides, and I scanned the room. It was hard to even distinguish any differences between all the doctors sitting in here eating. They all wore a teal colored doctor uniform, and all had their hair back in either ponytails, or were cropped short.

I finally found Dr. Brooks from the crowd of doctors and nurses and trudged over to him, anger swelling up inside of me. I pulled him from the salad stand he was currently standing at, and smacked his back against the grey wall. He dropped his lunch tray, his faded blue eyes wide with terror as I angrily glared at him, my fists around his thin uniform shirt.

"Edward?!" he shouted, scared shitless. "W-what are you doing?"

"I'm here to knock some sense in you. Don't worry, you'll know how to fix yourself up, Doc." I pulled my fist back, prepared to punch him.

"Wait!" he shouted, his hands in front of his face.

I still held my fist in the air, but I waited for him to speak.

"Why are you doing this? What did I do?!" he blubbered.

What a fucking baby.

I snorted, then put my face closer to his, my eyes in slits.

"What did you do?" I repeated sarcastically. "I'll tell you what you fucking did! You got Bella's hopes up, telling her to come down here, to laugh in her face and make her look stupid, and basically tell her stuff that she already knew!" I yelled.

He winced, looking like he was about to cry.

"I'm so sorry, Edward. I-it won't happen again."

I grinned. "You bet it won't happen again!" I slammed my fist against his nose, and he slumped against the wall, already unconscious.

_What a loser_, I mentally laughed.

Then I realized, I had done this in a room full of other doctors.

I slowly turned away from Dr. Brooks' unconscious body, turning to the silent crowd of bystanders.

Every other doctor or nurse in the room was perfectly still, lunch trays in hand. Some were paused in the middle of an action. One nurse had one foot half in the air, her mouth open. Another guy had a bottle of lemonade right by his mouth, but stopped once he saw what I just did to a fellow doctor.

"What?" I sneered.

They all cringed.

"Why don't you take a picture, it will last longer!" I yelled, my voice echoing throughout the ominous lunchroom.

One nurse ran from the room, shouting something I couldn't hear. Two seconds later, two security guards - that were _huge - _came in.

_Oh shit, _I thought to myself in panic.

They looked at Dr. Brooks' unconscious body on the ground, their eyes widening. Then they returned their hard gazes back up to me.

"Did you do this?" one asked in an extremely deep voice.

I hesitated, pursing my lips.

Would I go to jail? Oh well, that idiot deserved it.

"Uh…yeah, maybe," I told them, scratching the back of my neck nervously.

The two men looked at each other, nodded, then grabbed each of my arms in two of theirs.

"Hey!" I shouted.

They dragged me down the halls, and as I was basically being carried out of the building, I caught a glimpse of Bella's parents. This would be a nice thing to explain to them. What was I supposed to say? Should I have said, "Oh, I just punched a doctor in the face and he blacked out. No big deal."

No, I definitely could not say that.

The two security guards threw me out of the hospital. I landed on the sidewalk on my back with an audible _thud. _I scraped my hands against the sidewalk, and my knuckles were bleeding now from punching Dr. Brooks in the face.

This day just got better and better.

"And we better not catch you back in here," the man with almost black eyes warned.

They both turned, going back through the automatic doors, back into the hospital. As their figures disappeared behind the door, it opened again, revealing Bella and her parents.

I groaned, standing up off the dirty sidewalk.

Bella's dad was smiling in amusement, shaking his head at me. Bella's mom just rolled her eyes, and Bella looked appalled, forgetting her misery for a second to take in me after being kicked out of the hospital.

She ran over to me, looking at my hands that were dripping with blood.

"What happened?" she gasped, flipping my left hand over to see the bleeding knuckles as well.

"My fist accidentally crashed into Dr. Brooks' face…" I mumbled, watching the ruby red blood ooze slowly from the cuts.

She looked up at me, a small smile playing at the corner of her lips.

"Why would you do that?" she asked.

I snorted. "Because I am personally obligated to kick the ass of anyone who hurts you in any way," I said in a tone that showed that this should have been obvious.

She shook her head in disapproval, but I could see the smile on her lips, full on now.

"Got yourself kicked out, Edward?" Charlie asked, smiling still.

I nodded.

He slapped me on the back. "Good for you."

I was a little taken aback at how much he seemed to not care about that. He probably heard about how much of a jerk the doctor was, and didn't care that I destroyed his face. I know I didn't.

"Well let's get out of here," Renee sighed. "I want to go home."

Bella held my hand, then I hissed as the warmness from her hand stung the scratches on my palms. She pulled back instantly, biting her lip as she took in the expression on my face. My nose was wrinkled as I clenched and unclenched my hand.

"Sorry," she mumbled.

I could see the blush painting her cheeks, but I didn't reply. I just smirked as we got into the car back to Bella's house.

When we got back to Bella's, she yanked me straight up to her room by my wrist this time. As we were ascending the stairs, I could see Renee's expression of concern. But, we were sort of on a truce basis right now, so she didn't comment on Bella and I being alone in her room together.

Bella yanked me into the room, then shut the door quickly. She looked at my hands, still dripping with blood from my knuckles and palms. She shook her head.

"Edward, why are you always getting into trouble?" she whispered, pulling me onto her bed with her.

I shrugged. "I guess I'm trouble."

She grimaced, then stood up from the bed. She left the room, and I just sat there, my mouth in an O.

Was she mad that I did that? Why did she just leave without giving any explanation? However my worries stopped once she returned with a wet cloth and a bunch of other bottles of stuff. I didn't know why she needed this stuff, so I quirked an eyebrow at her as she sat down next to me, wiping the wet cloth against the skin of my arms and hands where the blood had dripped onto.

"I'm fixing you up," she said, her eyes trained on the skin she was cleaning.

My brows furrowed as she poured a little of something onto the other side of the wet cloth, then rubbed it on my palm. I hissed, pulling my hand away. My hand stung, worse than from when Bella had held it, but like there was fire there.

"What the hell is that?!" I hissed, rubbing my aching palm.

She held up a bottle that said: Alcohol on it.

"Why do you need that? It hurts like hell!"

"Do you want to get an infection?" she asked, tilting her head to the side as the deadly rag neared closer to my stinging wound.

I backed away on the bed, far away from her hand holding that stupid cloth.

"Yes. I do."

She rolled her eyes, inching closer to me.

I backed away, my back hitting the headboard.

She crawled closer, pushing my shoulders back down when I tried to escape again.

"Edward, you're being such a baby," she said, her eyes in slits.

I squirmed under her arms, not really fighting because I didn't want to accidentally make her fall off the bed.

"But…it hurts," I said like a baby.

_What a man, _I thought to myself.

"You've had worse-" She stopped. Her eyes looked somewhere, but didn't focus on anything. Her mouth was in a little O, and the hand holding the rag fell from my shoulder as a big smile occupied her lips.

I waved my bloody hand in front of her face.

"Um, earth to Bella," I said, my brow furrowed in confusion.

Her big brown eyes met with mine again, and she smiled even bigger.

"You've had worse!" Bella said excitedly.

I stared at her like she had three heads.

"Thanks for pointing that out. It's not a secret that I had a shitty childhood," I said, a little peeved.

She smacked my shoulder. "No, you idiot! I remember!" she exclaimed.

My eyes widened in realization.

"I remember…a lot of things," she muttered. She got the crease that I loved in-between her eyebrows, playing with the rag in her hands as she stared down.

The smell of the disgusting alcohol swam up my nose, making my head ache. I held my breath, staring at Bella uneasily.

She was staring down, the rag hanging limply in her hand.

"He…he hurt you a lot, didn't he?" she whispered shakily.

I pressed my lips together, staring at her intensely.

She stared back, her expression pained.

I finally nodded.

I could see tears glistening in her eyes as she moved her gaze from my face and to her lap where her hands were resting lifelessly on her thighs.

"But he hurt you a lot, too," I whispered. "And I protected you from him…mostly."

"So you let yourself get hurt…to keep me safe?" she checked, her voice tight. She looked back up at me, her eyes blank but filled to the brim with glistening tears.

I nodded hesitantly, prepared for the anger I was sure to get for risking my life for hers. Selfless Bella.

But, what she did surprised me. She yanked my shoulders to her, and crushed my body to hers.

My eyes widened, and I hesitantly wrapped my arms under her arms. I stuffed my face into her shoulder, breathing in the smell of her wavy brown hair.

"Thank you," she whispered almost inaudibly.

"For what?" I mumbled into her hair.

She pulled back, analyzing me like I was a fish in a tank.

"You don't see how amazing you are, do you, Edward?" she asked, tilting her head to the side.

I shrugged my shoulders nonchalantly. "There's nothing really to me. I'm just a grubby guy with a dark past." I grimaced.

She put her hands on either side of my face. Her eyes were alight with amazement.

"There's so much more to you than that," she whispered with a conviction I didn't think she was capable of.

I diverted my eyes. I was for once, the embarrassed one.

"Okay…" I murmured. "Like what?" I looked back up at her skeptically.

"Well," she sighed, pulling back to look me up and down, "on the outside, you look like a real tough guy. But on the inside, you're really sensitive. I think the only reason you have that tough exterior is…" She nodded, smiling slightly. "Because of your past."

"You remember?" I asked.

She nodded. "You are tough, Edward, but you're also very sweet."

"Do you only think that because of my reading choices?" I said, trying to lighten the mood.

She shook her head, a small smile playing at her lips. She ignored my words, though, continuing on with her little speech.

"You are probably one of the most amazing people I have ever met." She shrugged. "I guess that's why I love you so much." She smiled, her eyes shining with all her love. "I've never met anyone like you."

I pulled her into my lap, ignoring the stinging protest of my palms.

"I've never met anyone like you, either," I murmured into her hair. "You saved me from a horrible life."

She wrapped her legs around my waist, resting her hands on my shoulders. Then, she lightly brushed her warm lips against mine, making a shiver roll throughout my body.

"I'll _always _love you," she whispered breathily, her breath flowing deliciously into my open mouth.

I licked my lips, shutting my eyes.

"And I'll always fucking love you," I replied.

I could feel her smile against my lips. Then, she yanked my lips to hers, her hands clasped tightly around the back of my neck.

Bella POV

_It was the same man. The same man from the nightmare. I was running through trees, loping in and out of them quickly. It was cold, the sky pitch black, the only little amount of light from the full moon up in the center of the trees._

_As I ran farther and farther, I could hear the sound of screams and…gun shots._

_I stopped running, my dirty sneakers digging into the ground from the abrupt halt. The dirt clumped up at the tips of my shoes, little rocks and pieces of grass unearthing from the ground._

"_Don't come back!" Edward's familiar voice shouted. "Keep running, Bella!"_

_Tears were clouding my vision, and I slowly turned towards the way I had just been. The light from the man's house was glowing brightly, like a raging fire, deep within the pits of Hell._

_I had to go back. I couldn't leave Edward there to die._

_I took a deep breath, then sprinted back. My legs were strong, the muscles burning nicely in them. My whole body was on fire, but it was a pleasant fire. I breathed in and out easily, hopping over fallen logs and big rocks resting on the mossy ground._

_I stopped outside the man's house. The only sound was of crashes and Edward's grunts. I stood at the foot of the two steps leading into his house. My eyes were locked on the doorway that was wide open, the light shining out of it. It burned my skin like a blazing fire, and I took in a shuddering breath before stepping onto the first step._

"_Go back!"_

_I took on another step._

"_Yes, come, Bella," the man urged._

"_No!" Edward roared._

_I was engulfed in the light. It burned my skin. The fire of light danced on every inch of my skin, making my throat shrivel, and breathing impossible. I fell to the floor, wrapped in a ball. I let the fire engulf me, the sounds of everyone's words surrounding me._

"_You're coming with me now," the man - who I now knew as James - said._

"_If I could, I'd get you out of here," Edward's distant voice whispered._

"_The perfect pair…" Edward's voice murmured._

"_I want you to be happy."_

_Edward's voice filled my mind. Every word he said, and everything we did. The memories flooded my mind. My brain boiled from all the thoughts and words and knowledge. I couldn't concentrate on it all._

"_That's not a fucking life!" Edward shouted._

_His voice rang through my ears, and I shot up._

My breathing was stuttering as I looked around the dark room. I patted the left side of the bed and still felt Edward right next to me. However, that didn't comfort me. I had to go. Where? I had no idea.

I slowly slid from the bed, tiptoeing to the door. I looked back at Edward's sleeping form. He looked so peaceful in sleep, the silvery glow of the moon lighting up the right side of his beautiful face. I sighed from the sight, then slipped out of the room like a ghost of the night. I grabbed my flip-flops, and put on a thin sweater before sneaking out through the kitchen door. I wrapped my arms around my chest protectively, staring down at my feet as they walked across the uneven lawn. I hopped over the fence, then ran through my neighbors yard.

I had to think things through. That was a lot of information to take in in one night.

First, I had my memories back. There wasn't one thing I was missing. I felt like I had just woken up from a very deep sleep. Well, I did, but I mean it in a different way. I feel like a whole part of me has been missing for so long, and finally it had found its way back to me.

Second, James was alive. I was angry. The feelings of what happened with James were fresh to me - even though they really weren't. However, my body reacted differently. My muscles were tight in an anticipation for something. My back was straight, and I could feel the adrenaline filling my veins. It took the lead of my body, leading me to James.

Third, my feelings for Edward couldn't change. Even if I forgot him, my body couldn't. That love I had for him was bone deep. It was unconditional, inerasable, _irrevocable_.

* * *

"I want to see him," I ordered as I shoved the police station door open.

The policeman at his shift right now looked taken aback. He hopped up from his chair, watching as I speed walked over to his chest high desk.

"Who are you?" he asked.

I rolled my eyes. "I'm Bella Swan."

His brow furrowed, then realization hit his face. "Oh! You're that girl who got kidnapped then lost her me-"

"I have to see him now," I interrupted, not at all in the mood for his brainless chatter.

He looked down at his watch, then back up at me. "You _are_ aware that it is two in the morning, right?"

I nodded, tapping my fingers against the wooden desk in impatience.

He blew air out of his mouth, then sighed. "Who do you want to see, kid?"

"I need to see James Cullen."

He raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

"Is that any of your business?" I asked, annoyed now.

He spluttered. "Uh…umm, no, I guess n-"

"Take me to him," I interrupted again.

He nodded, then waved me over to follow him through a doorway.

We walked down a hallway with no doors or windows. It was all just white, and it was fitting. I had no emotions right now, so blankness was good. I didn't _want _to feel anything. We then went through another doorway, and it led to a staircase, but it was pitch black.

"The cells are down here," the officer said, holding the door wider as he stepped through. "I'll go down first. Make sure you don't fall."

I nodded, my breath hitching as what I was about to do finally set in.

I was going to come face-to-face with the man who did all of this. Because of him, all of this started. I was angry that he kidnapped me - like any sane person would be - but also thankful at the same time. If he hadn't, then I would have never met Edward. I guess that was one thing that came out of this totally fucked up situation, as Edward would say.

I wondered what he would say to me when he saw me. Would he be surprised? Probably, I decided. What was I supposed to say, "How dare you for doing this to me and Edward!"

That…asshole even did this to Edward. Unfortunately, no one was there to keep Edward from being starved and beaten. My heart clenched at the memory of all of Edward's deep, pink and silver scars. They were because of James. Even some of my scars were because of him, even if they weren't caused physically.

"I'll…tell him he has a visitor," the officer said. "Then I'll take him to that room over there." He nodded his head to a door that had bars covering it from being opened. "You can go wait in there - it's unlocked."

I nodded and numbly walked into the room.

There was a table, and two chairs on opposite sides. There was a one-way window and a big, bright light hanging from the ceiling above the table. The light poured across it's gray surface, spreading out across the table.

I took a seat in the seat closest to the door, my back to it. I folded my hands in my lap, and saw the little scars scattered across my hands from the day Edward went away. I swiped my index finger against them, but there was no indent. These scars weren't so bad, not compared to all those horrible ones on Edward's chest. And yet, he was still beautiful. Even if half of his face was gone I'd think he was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

I heard the screeching of the door open and automatically stiffened in my chair. I knew he wouldn't recognize me from the back. I tried breathing, but my throat felt too tight. I shut my eyes tightly at the sound of the door shutting again, and two pairs of footsteps. I could hear metal clanking together, and realized it must have been his handcuffs. The sound of the metal chair legs scraping against the linoleum floors made me shiver, and the breath I had been holding in shot out of my mouth in nervous, jagged lurches.

"I'll be right outside the door," the officer's familiar voice murmured.

I nodded, my eyes still shut tightly.

I heard his retreating footsteps, then the sound of the metal door being shut.

As soon as I heard the metal clank of the door shutting, I shot my eyes open.

There, in front of me, was James. His hollow, inhuman grey eyes bore into mine. He was smirking.

"Huh, Bella Swan. I've been waiting awhile to hear from you."

* * *

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	22. I Am Unraveled

Chapter 22: I Am Unraveled

I kept my face expressionless. I wouldn't let him see my hurt or my fear. I tried not to look into his eyes, but they were hypnotizing me, always bringing my eyes back to his. When you looked into his eyes, it was like staring at an animal - a predator. They were intimidating, and there was no emotion at all there.

"So what can I do for you?" he asked. He put his cuffed hands on the table, folding them in ease.

I stared at the shining cuffs without blinking.

"Kid? What do you want?"

I looked back up at him. "I hate you," I whispered.

He grinned. "Hate is a very strong emotion…just like love."

My eyes were in slits as I moved back in my seat.

He was grinning, his greasy hair falling into his eyes from not being cut in so long.

"Is that all you came here to say?" he laughed. "That you hate me?"

I took a deep breath, fighting back all the memories.

They came anyway.

I remembered the frightened way my heart sped up when I saw him waiting for me on the road to my home. I remembered the feeling of being starved, the way my stomach seemed to eat at itself. I could also even remember the distinct pain of blood pouring into my mouth, my vision going cloudy from being punched.

I stood up abruptly from my chair, knocking it over onto the floor with a loud clatter. I strode over to the other side of the table, then grabbed him by the collar of his shirt. The whole time he was grinning. I pulled back my fist, then slammed it into his nose with as much force as my weak body could exert.

His head flew backwards, and blood streamed from his nose in fresh torrents. It quickly flowed down his mouth, to his chin, then trickled onto his orange jumper. He held his cuffed hands to his nose.

"Ugh," he groaned, shutting his eyes.

I ignored the very evident throbbing in my knuckles as I yanked him up by his shirt collar and smashed him against the gray, brick wall. I didn't know where all of this strength was coming from, but I was glad I had it.

"How does it feel!" I screamed, smashing him against the wall again. "How does it feel to be weak and have someone hurting you?!" Thankfully, my voice was too strong, and it held back the tears clogged in my throat.

He grinned, the blood pouring onto his yellow teeth. He leaned into my ear and whispered, "Kinky."

I smashed him against the wall again, my throbbing hand slapping across his cheek.

"You are the most disgusting, disturbed person I have ever met," I growled, tears brimming in my eyes.

He just stared at me blankly.

"Why did you do this to me?" I bawled. "Why did you do it to Noah?!" I smashed him against the wall again. "Y-you ruined everything and everyone…"

He stared at me as if the answer was obvious.

I waited.

"Because, I wanted to."

I shut my eyes and shook my head as the tears finally fell. I let go of his shirt, then walked out.

"Miss. Swan!" the officer yelled once he saw me emerge from the room James and I were just in.

I looked up at him through my tear filled vision.

"What…happened?" he whispered, his eyes running over me.

I shook my head, the tears making me unable to speak. I couldn't open my mouth. If I did, sobs would erupt. So instead, I just turned away and walked up the black staircase.

Edward POV

Everything felt off. The bed felt desolate. I felt cold, and like a part of me was yanked away from me. It was like I was missing part of my body.

I rubbed my hands against the side of the bed where Bella usually slept. I figured she might have moved away from me in her sleep. She did move a lot. But, there was no one there.

I shot up from the bed, my eyes widening in the pitch blackness. I was still in Bella's room, I knew. Her smell was the only thing in here. It definitely wasn't Emmett's place - no beer or cigarette smells.

_Maybe she fell off the bed when she was asleep_, my mind suggested.

I flung myself off the side of the bed, but there was nothing there. The only thing there was the cold, wooden ground. I stood up, looking around the room for a light switch. I finally found one, and looked around the now illuminated room.

No one.

My heart started to speed up.

Where the hell was she?!

I stood by the window I had snuck into that one night, and began yanking at my hair. Then, from the corner of my eye, I saw her. I looked out the window with wide eyes and saw Bella hopping over her neighbors fence. The white moonlight shined down on her, making her look like a fucking angel, or maybe a ghost. Ghosts usually were the ones sneaking around at night, not angels.

She was only wearing her little, blue cotton pajama shorts, her white pajama tank top, and a thin, grey sweater.

Why the _fuck_ was she walking around town at almost three in the morning dressed like _that_?!

I ran from the room, then out the kitchen door as quietly as possible. I stopped on the porch when her eyes met mine. We both just stood there like idiots.

The wind was only mild. Well, it _was _August. We never usually got much wind in the summer. However, it was strong enough to blow her hair. Her wavy hair blew all to one side, making her look fucking beautiful.

Yup, an angel.

I ran over to her, then scooped her up into my arms.

She clung to my body like a child, wrapping her arms around my neck, and her legs around my waist. She burrowed her face into my neck, taking in big gulps of my scent.

I pulled her face back so I could look at her, and she tried to turn her face away.

"Don't hide from me," I whispered, looking at her hidden face.

She took a deep breath, then slowly met my intense gaze. She had tears streaming down her cheeks, and her big, brown eyes were bloodshot.

I plopped down onto the grass, holding her face in my hands.

"Why the fuck are you crying?" I whispered, my face full of concern.

Her lower lip trembled. She shook her head, covering her face in the crook of my neck and shaking it back and forth.

I cradled her head against me like she was a baby, or a porcelain doll.

"What?" I whispered, rubbing down her hair. "Tell me," I urged.

She looked back up at me, and fresh tears were there.

I rubbed them away angrily. I didn't want to see her sad.

"Bella, what's wrong? Why are you out here?" I demanded, my teeth barred.

She wiped her tears away, then looked back up at me. Her face was expressionless.

"I got everything back. I know everything." She stared at me numbly.

I looked down at her in confusion. "How could that be a bad thing? I thought this was what you wanted?" My brow furrowed down in confusion.

So Bella was outside at almost three in the morning, in her flimsy pajamas, because she got her memories back…. I didn't understand any of this.

"It is," she bawled. She gasped for breath, shaking her head back and forth. "I wanted this, but I didn't know h-how…" She stopped, crying again, rubbing furiously with the back of her hands at the tears ran simultaneously down her cheeks, then dropping off the edge of her chin onto my jean covered legs.

I shook my head. "I'm confused as hell," I muttered, pulling her hands from her face and holding them in one of mine. I wiped my lips across her cheeks, trying to calm her.

Her shuddering stopped a little, but she was still shaking slightly and gasping for breaths.

She swallowed, wincing. "I just…" she whispered in a tear filled voice. "I just didn't know how much pain all of this information was for me," she explained. I watched as the wet streaks on her cheeks shined in the moonlight, like glitter scattered across her gorgeous face. "I feel weighed down, like this was all brought on at once - which it was." She sighed, wiping at new tears. "And…I remember what you told me - at the willow tree."

I looked down at the grass uncomfortably. I didn't like remembering my past. I didn't even want her to have those disgusting images in her head.

"You mean…my past, right?" I whispered almost inaudibly.

I felt her nod, her hair swaying slightly.

I brought my bottom lip into my mouth, biting it nervously. It was such a Bella thing to do. I brought my lip back out, shaking my head at myself. I shouldn't have been embarrassed. This was Bella. I had told her already, so it shouldn't feel like the awkward situation that we had the first time. This was all old news to me, but to her…

"What about it?" I whispered, still staring down.

I felt her little hand clasp around my chin, then jerk it up to meet her gaze.

Her eyes bored into mine, tons of different emotions swirling through their beautiful depths.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, never letting go of my chin.

I stared back blankly. "Why are _you _sorry. You didn't do it."

"You didn't deserve for that to happen to you," she murmured. She moved her hand from my chin, then brought it around to my neck, lacing her fingers through my hair.

I gulped, memories from _that night _washing through my eyes. I blinked them away. "And you didn't deserve what happened to you," I whispered. I grabbed at the grass, breaking it apart furiously. I tried to ignore the feel of her big eyes on my face, but I couldn't. It was like she was fucking burning holes into the side of my face. I looked back up.

"It wasn't nearly as bad as what you had to go through," she said.

I snorted.

"Edward, I had you to protect me. You had no one, and you were just a little kid." She rubbed my hair down. "Look what he's done to you," she murmured. She pulled my T-shirt up a little bit, revealing some of the many scars scattered across my body.

I yanked it down, glaring at the shirt.

"So that's why I'm sorry," she finished in a whisper.

"I didn't protect you from everything," I said angrily.

She stared at me in confusion.

I ground my teeth together, then brought my hand up to the back of her head, and touched the deep scar there, still healing.

"I didn't keep you safe from this," I hissed venomously.

She pushed my hand away, then put her own hand where mine was. She stared down at the ground as she felt the scar from when she… "fell".

"But there was nothing you could have do-"

"Yes there was!" I interrupted. "I could have stood in front of you. I could have grabbed you before you fell. I could have…never met you," I whispered.

Alarm was all over her face. She pulled back slightly.

"What are you talking about?" she demanded, grabbing fistfuls of my shirt.

"If I didn't ever meet you…none of this would have ever happened."

She groaned, shoving at my chest, then standing up from my lap.

"Haven't we had this discussion on more than one occasion?!" she yelled. "Like I said a thousand times, if I didn't meet you, I'd be dead now. You didn't follow me home that day. You didn't kidnap yourself. You didn't bring me to his home." She sucked in a deep breath. "It's all James' fault! And you know what? I'm sort of glad he kidnapped you, in a way. I'm not glad he hurt you, but I'm glad I met you, because if I could go back to that day, and go a different way home, I wouldn't. Because, if I did, I would have never met you, and I'd still be the miserable, pathetic little girl that I was before all of this started!"

I stared at her, the summer wind picking up, making me shiver from the cold.

"And if you want to change that…then you don't want _me._"

I stood up, angry now.

"How the fuck could you even say that?! After all of the things that have happened between us…" I yanked her close to my chest. "I couldn't imagine living one day without you, Bella. I'm too attached to you - it's not fucking healthy."

Her breath was shooting out in gasps. "Me too," was all she got out.

"Good," I growled, "because I'm tired of having to argue with you." I grabbed the back of her neck, yanking her face to mine so our foreheads were touching, and her lips were against mine. "All I want to do is love you, all day, every day." Yeah, I was like a fucking rollercoaster, but these feelings, they were all new to me. It was strange to feel so regretful for meeting someone and wanting to push them away, and wanting to fucking claim them and _never let them go._

She pushed her lips against mine, and I pulled her neck as close as it could get. She hopped onto my waist, latching her legs around me.

I staggered back slightly, then started walking back to the house, the cold getting too hard to ignore.

I was surprised her parents hadn't heard us yet. I was stumbling up the steps, Bella still attached to me as she kissed down my neck. I shoved her bedroom door open, then kicked it closed with my barefoot. I plopped us down on the bed, then pulled her away.

"Jesus," I muttered, breathing heavily.

She just grinned sleepily at me, then snuggled against my chest.

It was silent, except for our ragged breaths.

Then, I remembered something.

"Bella?" I whispered, afraid she had already fallen asleep.

"Mm-hmm?" she murmured.

"Where did you go?"

"To the police station," she mumbled into my chest.

I furrowed my brow, confused.

I guessed she sensed my confusion, because she added, "When I got my memories back, I needed to see James."

"Why?" I asked.

She shrugged against me. "I had to close the wound he left up finally. I had to see him one more time."

I nodded, clutching her closer to my chest.

"And you couldn't wait until I was conscious?"

She shook her head.

I sighed, kissing the top of her head.

"You're going to drive me crazy," I murmured.

There was no reply, so I guessed she fell back asleep.

I sighed, snuggling close to her, preparing to fall back asleep myself.

* * *

**Short and...ha, slightly sweet.**

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	23. Broken Glass And Broken Promises

Chapter 23: Broken Glass And Broken Promises

Bella POV

Waking up next to Edward would never get old. The feel of his warm body pressed tightly up against mine was heavenly. My arm was always laying on his chest, and it would move steadily up and down from his even breaths.

I smiled and squeezed Edward's inert body.

He hummed softly in his sleep, then squeezed me back unconsciously.

I didn't know why, but I still wasn't tired. I was wide awake, actually. It was strange since it seemed like I just got back from the police station, when really it was eight o'clock in the morning.

I slid out of his loose grip then tiptoed from the room, this time staying in the house. I walked through the hallway, pushing down my unruly hair. I was about to go down the steps when I heard a deep, unfamiliar voice. I stopped with my foot in the air, about to step down on the creaky step. I furrowed my brow, trying with all my might to make out the muffled words coming from the probably closed kitchen door. I huddled on the step, still clutching the banister. I was going to eavesdrop. I knew it was impolite, but I didn't really care. I pressed my face against the banister railing, peaking my eyes out to look at the closed kitchen door as I listened.

"I'm terribly sorry for the abruptness of my visit, Mr. and Mrs. Swan, but…" He cleared his throat, and I finally recognized the voice to be Chief Rogers.

I hoped he hadn't been told about my…appearance at the police station last night. My parents would be furious at me for sneaking out so late.

"What is it?" my dad's voice asked.

There was silence. Here it comes.

I braced myself for the shouting my parents would have. They would know I went to see _James _last night, unprotected.

"It-it's about James Cullen," Chief Rogers continued.

I shut my eyes tightly, tensing up for the sound of their shrill, angry screams.

"He escaped."

I almost didn't hear it. But I did.

My eyes shot open, and my heart started thrusting itself against my ribcage. It hurt to take the stuttering breaths I needed to take in to calm myself. I couldn't hear the words coming from the kitchen. It sounded like it was in a slow motion, and very deep. I gripped the banister tighter, my knuckles turning white from the pressure.

He was out of jail. He was supposed to be their for _life. _He was a sick, twisted man. He couldn't be out. What if he started this all over again with other innocent kids like Edward and me? What if…. No, he wouldn't…

The kitchen door came open, and I didn't realize I had stood up on the top of the stairs, now visible. My mom stopped her furious stride, her brown eyes wide, mirroring mine, I was sure.

Everything was moving in slow motion, and I was getting even more panicked.

"Bella?" my mom's deep, slow voice said.

It could've been a scream, but it didn't make much of a difference to my ears. I decided I needed to get everything I needed to know from Chief Rogers. So, I stepped onto the first step. Well, at least I thought I did. I didn't feel the wood under my barefoot. It was all perfectly slow and clear to me. I could feel my foot winding down through the air. I could feel the impact of my chest landing like a belly flop on the enormous staircase. I heard the whizzing of the wind passing by my ears like one of those airplanes that had the banners attached to it, flying across the sky for everyone to see.

There was a stinging in my chest as I tumbled down the rest of the stairs - and their were a _lot _of stairs. The stinging in my chest moved to every other part of my body as well. My legs, my arms, my neck, and even my head. I began to panic, thinking I'd lose it all _again._

I finally stopped tumbling down the steps, smashing into the glass front door with a loud crash. I felt the big, glass splinters stab my skin, but I just flinched. I breathed in and out quickly, taking in a lungful of air to calm down.

I turned my head and I saw my mom, dad, and Chief Rogers running over in slow motion with panicked expressions on their faces. I shut my eyes slowly, letting the pain in my head consume me until nothing was left but blackness.

* * *

"Bella!" Edward's voice shouted.

I scrunched my face up. His loud voice was hurting my ears, and my entire body felt like it was being smacked repeatedly by a big mallet. I felt warm, familiar arms caressing my face in gentle but manic movements.

"How did this fucking happen?!" Edward screamed.

I heard a giant babble of three different voices, all speaking at the same time.

"Shut up!" Edward yelled.

The babbling stopped.

"We have to get her to the hospital, right?"

"Yes!" my mom's voice said quickly. "Yes, we do."

I felt Edward's arms slide swiftly under my still body, then tighten as I was lifted off the hard, jagged ground. I could feel warm liquid slowly soaking my clothes, dripping down my arms. I was in someone's lap now - probably Edward's, I decided.

"Drive!" Edward's harsh voice ordered.

I could hear the screeching of tires, and the purr of the car's engine as it went from zero to one hundred miles per hour in a second. I lurched forward from the movement, but Edward's strong arms tightened around my body before I could fly out of his lap, and maybe through more glass, into the windshield.

I decided to try and open my eyes now. I didn't want Edward to think I was worse than I really was. However, my head felt so clouded. I could still hear the annoying thudding of my pulse through my ears. But this time, the pulse was racing even faster. I squinted my eyes open and saw Edward's taught, square jaw. I squeezed the fistful of his shirt that was in my hand - even though I didn't remember even grabbing it.

He looked down immediately from the soft tug of shirt. His moss eyes widened, and horror filled them.

"Bella?" he whispered.

"Yeah?" I croaked. My throat burned, and I winced from the pain and the sound of my scratchy voice.

"Are you okay? We're almost to the hospital," he said.

I cleared my throat, trying to sound better to lessen his worrying.

"I'm fine," I rasped.

He flinched from my voice.

I looked down at myself and gasped.

There was blood staining every inch of my little cotton shorts, and my tank top. My arms and legs had blades of glass still inside them, and blood was pooling swiftly out, leaking onto Edward's pants.

"I'm-I'm bleeding!" I stuttered, looking around helplessly for some way to fix myself.

Edward pressed me down.

I looked at him incredulously.

"You shouldn't move," he whispered. "You might move the glass and end up cutting yourself _more._"

I gulped, taking in a deep breath.

I really wished I hadn't opened my eyes. Seeing this was worse than the clouded half-conscious state I once was in. I studied the way the lines of blood trickled to my dad's car floor, like a dripping faucet. The gashes didn't hurt much, but a stinging pain on my forehead was what hurt the most. I reached up to touch the part of my forehead where the stinging pain was coming from, when Edward abruptly yanked my hand down.

I stared at him in confusion.

"I don't know if you want to…" He stopped, pressing his lips together. Edward's eyes were cold, filled with grief.

"What are you talking about? What's on my head?"

He breathed out heavily, then released my hand.

I slowly reached my hand back up, never moving my eyes from Edward's. Then, I felt it. The big gash on my forehead with blood spurting out. _This _was like a faucet turned on _high_! It had a giant shard of glass in it I could feel. It was sharp and cold and made me want to puke my guts out.

I gasped, then pulled my hand away quickly. I looked down at my fingers and they were coated in my bright red blood.

The car stopped, and my mom and dad opened the side Edward and I were sitting in. Edward slid out extra carefully, balancing me effortlessly in his arms. He and my parents jogged to the sliding hospital doors.

I got a moment of déjà vu. I remembered when Edward, my parents and I had come to the hospital to see the doctor. It was a huge waste of time. I also remembered Edward being thrown onto the sidewalk we were walking on now, and felt the urge to chuckle. However, the expressions everyone was wearing right now was far from comical.

We busted through the hospital doors. The nurse at a desk jumped up from her desk, her eyes as wide as saucers from my haggard-looking body. People weren't used to such destruction in this Podunk town.

"Oh my lord! What happened?!" She began dialing on the phone at her desk. "We need a doctor in the ER now. Thank you." She hung up, then ushered Edward over to a gurney that was just wheeled in by two men with wide-eyed expressions.

Jeez, they worked in the ER. You'd think they'd seen it all…

"Okay, you can leave now, sir. We can take it from here," one of the men said as Edward settled me onto a gurney.

He looked at them with such ferocity that I was surprised they didn't start trembling and back away from the gurney I was laying on.

"No, Edward, it's okay," I murmured. "Just stay out here. Help my parents from going insane." I tried to smile, but the stinging of the bleeding of the gashes turned it into a grimace.

His expression was pained. He gently cupped my cheek, then kissed my forehead, avoiding the gash as he did so.

"I love you," he breathed against my forehead.

I shut my eyes. "I love you, too," I whispered.

"We have to move now," one of the nurses said.

I opened my eyes reluctantly and smiled genuinely at him this time.

He smiled back.

They started wheeling me away, running at full speed.

I clutched the bars on either side of the gurney, nervous that I would fly off it at any second.

They crashed the gurney through the double doors that said "Emergency Room" on it, and my breathing sped up.

_Maybe I shouldn't have sent Edward away… _I thought nervously as I saw all the instruments of torture the doctors called "tools" lining silver tables.

They pushed the gurney under a bright white light, and I had to squint to see the dark figures as they moved. The sound of clanking metal tools filled the room.

I bit my lip as a doctor came into the light. He wore a standard green scrub - what all doctors wore.

"Are we going to put her under, doctor?" a female voice said from behind a thin mask.

He shook his head, holding his silver tool up in the light. The light ricocheted off the tool, blinding me.

"There's no time," he said through his mask. "By the time the drugs take effect, there will be too much blood loss. She's going to have to do this consciously."

My eyes widened, and I started scrambling nervously on the gurney. Four nurses came into the light and held down each of my arms and legs.

"No!" I gasped. "I-I can't stay awake! Are you kidding me?!" Tears overflowed in my eyes and pooled over and onto my cheeks.

"Calm down," the doctor holding the tool said. He inched nearer to my arm first, ready to yank the shards of glass from them, one by one. "This may hurt just a little," he said.

Screams filled the entire ER.

Edward POV

I sat in the waiting room, my head in my hands.

When I heard the crash, then saw the empty bed next to me, I knew something was wrong. But I never imagined it to be _that_. I was awakened with the wonderful sight of Bella lying in a pile of glass by the broken front door, blood pooling everywhere.

At first I thought it was her mom again because her mom was standing there with one of her "authentic" horror-struck expressions. But then Chief Rogers told me the story.

Chief Rogers. Why was he there…. Whatever, I had more important things to worry about.

Bella's piercing shrieks coming from the ER were not helping me calm down. I was about to just break down right along with Renee. I _knew _I shouldn't have let her go into the ER alone. I doubted Bella had ever been into the ER - at least not consciously. But now, she was in there…without me.

Again I broke the big rule I had made to myself. I promised myself that I would _never _let her get hurt again if there was a way I could prevent it. And this I could have definitely prevented.

I yanked at my hair, clenching my teeth in aggravation.

"It'll be okay," Charlie said.

I looked up at him, and he looked perfectly calm.

"How can you be so fucking calm?!" I yelled. "Your daughter is getting hacked up right now!"

He looked around the waiting room, and I did, too. I realized then that my shouting may have been _a little _too loud, because now, everyone in the ER was staring at me.

I rolled my eyes at them then turned away, back to Bella's dad.

"Well?" I budged. "How are you so calm? If you're taking some pills, I want them."

He laughed, shaking his head. "No, I'm not taking pills. I just know she'll be okay."

I snorted. "You can't know that."

He smiled calmly. "Well, I do."

I groaned, flopping backwards further into the crinkly waiting chair.

Waiting, and waiting, and waiting…and fucking waiting.

_2 hours later_

"Um, Mr. Swan?" a quiet female voice called.

My eyes snapped open, and I sat up in my chair.

"Yes?" Bella's dad said as he stood from the chair.

I stood, too.

"Bella is just fine." She smiled.

I grinned toothily, my heart swelling with happiness from her words.

"Can we see her?" I asked eagerly, nearly hopping up and down with so much fucking excitement. I was about to burst into giggles like a little girl. Pathetic, I know.

She looked like she was debating whether or not she should let us go in. I wanted to snap her neck.

"Well, she _is _in a lot of pain." She pursed her lips. "I'll ask if she wants any visitors." With that, she turned back down the all white hallway, entering a room to the left.

My shoulders slouched and I fell back into my crinkly chair.

"Cheer up, kid," Charlie said, sitting back down, too. "I'm sure she'd love to see you."

I half smiled, because it was probably true.

The nurse returned, and I stood up again.

God, I was a loser.

"She said she wants to see Edward…?" she said uncertainly, not knowing who "Edward" was.

I rolled my eyes, stepping forward.

"That's me," I said, pointing with my thumb at myself.

She gave me a long look, her eyes running from my face to my toes then back up again.

I stared at her as if she had three heads.

"Follow me," she said, smirking.

My eyes went into slits as I followed her. This lady was such a creeper.

The hallways were all white, and it was giving me a giant headache. There were doctors and nurses in scrubs. I could differentiate the doctors from the nurses because all the doctors had either blue or teal scrubs. The nurses had girly, flower filled patterns. We then went through another doorway, then turned a corner, then another corner, then she stopped at a door with the letter and number: B42 on it.

"This is her room," she said in a slurred voice.

I raised my eyebrows at her, but didn't comment. Maybe she was on drugs, or something.

She pushed the door open, revealing a small room. There was a window to the right of the room, and a chair next to the small bed in the middle of the room. There was a TV hanging on the wall across from the bed, and a low murmuring was emitting from it. And finally, sitting snugly in the little bed, was Bella.

I walked right over to her as soon as my eyes caught sight of her chocolate orbs.

She grinned at me, patting the small space next to her. She looked at the drug taking nurse in the doorway, and the smile disappeared from her face.

"You can leave," Bella spat, clutching my arm in a possessive manner.

I stared at her quizzically.

The nurse huffed, then shut the door behind her.

I turned back to Bella, raising my eyebrow.

"Um, what was that about?" I asked.

She was still glaring at the door. "I don't like her," she hissed through her teeth.

"Not that I disagree with you, but why not?"

She looked back over at me, her expression representing one of a person talking to someone who was mentally challenged.

"You didn't see how she was ogling you?!" she whispered frantically, a ruby colored blush spilling into her cheeks.

I grinned. "Jealous, are you?"

She glared at the bed sheets. She picked at a string coming off one of the sheets, not meeting my gaze.

"No," I said finally. "I didn't notice."

She snorted. "Well, then you must be blind, because _no one _can make it more obvious than _that _little display she just pulled."

I grinned even wider. "You're cute when you're jealous."

She smacked my arm playfully, smiling slightly.

I then noticed her forehead. Right there, on the left side of her forehead, was big threads, weaving in and out of her skin. There were even _more _stitches all along the tops of her arms, and one near her collarbone. She looked like she just came out of a fucking war.

She caught me staring and looked away again, the blush deepening.

I traced my pointer finger gently over the stitches on her forehead.

"I'm hideous, aren't I?" she whispered, looking down at her tattered legs. "Be honest."

I shook my head. "Nothing could make you look anything less than beautiful." I placed my palm against her cheek. It felt like setting your hand on the base of a clothes iron.

She rolled her eyes. "I wouldn't use a word like 'beautiful' to describe me."

Now I rolled my eyes. "You're right," I said. "Maybe…heavenly? How about gorgeous, or…astonishing?"

She was silent, staring down.

"Why else would James have chosen _you, _do you think?" I whispered, staring at her ivory skin. "You're a beautiful girl."

She looked up at me. "Even with these?" she asked, gesturing to all the cuts and stitches.

I traced my finger along the stitches near her collarbone. "Yes," I said sincerely.

She leaned forward slowly, swiping her lips gently across mine.

My lips seemed to tingle from the sensation, and a shiver rolled throughout my body, but it wasn't from being cold. Trust me. My body felt like it was experiencing a heat wave in Arizona.

I put both my hands on either side of her cheeks, then slowly pulled her lips back to mine.

This was heaven, right here. Having Bella's lips moving in a synchronization so perfect you would think it was rehearsed with mine. But, all too soon, we were interrupted, and I don't think Bella was all too happy about who the person to interrupt "accidentally" was.

Bitch-nurse stood in the doorway, a satisfied smirk on her hot pink lips.

"The doctor said you're free to go home, Miss. Swan."

Bella glared at her, a seething, "thanks", escaping through her tight jaw.

I fought to hold back a chuckle as bitch-nurse left the room.

Bella sighed, standing from the bed.

It was even worse now, but it didn't make her look any less beautiful. At least not in _my _eyes, and that was what definitely mattered. You could see even more of her blood stained stitches, and there were also blood filled gashes that weren't deep enough for stitches occupying her legs.

"Well, let's go back home," she sighed, stretching her arms above her head and revealing even _more _cuts.

I ground my teeth together, once again mentally beating the shit out of myself for not being there to catch her…like I promised myself.

I already broke the promise.


	24. Her Life Before Mine

Chapter 24: Her Life Before Mine

I refused to let Bella take one step out of the hospital room. I wasn't allowing her to walk. At least, not until she was better - or as better as she could get.

"Edward," Bella grumbled quietly in my ear as I carried her through the hallways.

Well, she said she didn't want to go in a wheelchair, so I decided to carry her. Who really gave a shit?

"This is so embarrassing!" she moaned as we rounded the corner to the waiting room.

Renee's eyes lit up, overflowing with tears. She cried out, and I cringed from the ear piercing shriek of "joy" that rang throughout the room. Even a few people sitting around us jolted in their seats, startled from the odd, dolphin-like yelp. Renee ran over, engulfing my arms and Bella's almost weightless body around her long, pale arms.

"I'm fine," Bella mumbled against her mom's arms.

"Fine?!"

I guessed Bella's callousness didn't _just_ bother me_._

"You almost died!" she yelled, making everyone turn once again.

Bella's cheeks lit up in embarrassment. "Well, I didn't. So…let's just go home, okay?" She gave her mom a strange look, darted her eyes to mine, then back to her mother's quickly.

I furrowed my brow, eyeing them both curiously.

Realization lit up Renee's face. "Oh…right. We should…go, right, Charlie?" She turned to Charlie, still sitting calmly in his crinkly waiting room seat. I despised those annoying fucking chairs.

He slowly stood up, stretching his arms above his head.

"Yeah, let's go." He smiled at me, then gave Bella the same weird look she just gave her mom.

If I hadn't been watching them so intently, I probably would've missed the slight nod of Bella's head.

I was about to ask what the hell was going on when bitch-nurse came into the room, holding a clipboard.

Interrupted yet again by her.

"Um, I need you to sign these release forms," she said in her valley girl accent.

Bella glared daggers at the side of bitch-nurse's face, but she didn't seem to notice. Bella's parents read and signed the forms, and then we were out of there. Once Bella and I were alone, I'd get the answers out of her.

Bella POV

We were home now, and Edward stared me down the whole way. He seemed annoyed, suspicious. We were just sitting in my room, staring at each other on opposite ends of the bed.

I fidgeted nervously with the ends of my shirt, biting my lip.

He didn't look angry. It was just that his intense stare was extremely uncomfortable.

I had to tell him about James. I _wanted _to. I just couldn't wait for all of his anger. It would be directed to that disgusting man. It was just…I was afraid of what he would do. What if he went on some kind of giant rampage, and went looking for James alone? That would _not _be good.

This is why I needed to make sure he promised that he wouldn't overreact. It was a long shot that he would actually listen to me, but I had to try. I also didn't have a lot of information about this little situation. I didn't know if this was a danger to me. Why were my parents so worked up? He wouldn't actually come searching for me, would he?

"Spit it the fuck out," Edward suddenly said, still staring at me intensely.

I wasn't ready. I needed to know more information on this before I told him. However, his expression made me want to just spit it out, as he said.

"Umm…can't it wait?" I stuttered nervously.

His eyes went into slits. He shuffled closer to me on the bed. He rested his hands on my waist, pulling me closer.

"No."

I ground my teeth together nervously.

He groaned, pulling away from me. My body instantly felt cold without his body close to mine.

"Why are you even keeping something from me?" he asked, irritated.

I couldn't meet his gaze. I felt bad. Edward out of all people shouldn't have been the last one to know. He should've been the first. I needed to muster up some courage and just spit it the fuck out, as he said to do.

I took a deep breath.

"Don't freak out, okay?" I whispered, slowly letting my eyes travel up back to his.

He nodded, still staring at me intensely.

How to say this so he _wouldn't _freak out? No matter how I said it, he would, that was for sure. It was inevitable. I should just say it, nice and fast - like ripping off a band aid.

"James escaped from jail," I blurted out. I sucked in a sharp breath as all my muscles tensed up. My back was rigid as I stared at Edward, bracing myself for what was to come.

He just kept staring at me blankly. The intense expression melted from his face. It was now lifeless, emotionless. He just continued staring at me, as if I said nothing.

I slowly waved my hand in front of his face.

"Uh…Edward?"

Silence.

I bit my lip. "Edward, are you okay?"

He blinked, slowly shaking his head.

I raised my eyebrows at his confused expression.

He looked around the room, his brow furrowed.

"Um, Edward?"

He turned to look at me.

"You heard me, right?" I asked hesitantly.

He nodded.

I was confused. I was so prepared for the profanities that would come pouring from his mouth. I braced myself for the anger that would fill his beautiful features. However, I got…nothing. Totally bleak.

"And you don't care?" I asked.

That snapped him out of it.

He fell back slightly, as if I had shoved against his chest.

"Why the fuck wouldn't I care?" he asked, wounded.

I wrung my fingers nervously. Now he had anger, of course.

"Well, I was kind of expecting a big angry rampage; that's what you always do. And…you're so calm. It's unlike you."

He smiled slightly. "You _want _me to start screaming and go on a 'big angry rampage'?" he asked with amusement filling his voice.

I furrowed my brow. "Well, no. It's just-"

He covered my mouth. "To save you the trouble, I'll just explain why I'm so calm."

I nodded, pulling his hand from my mouth.

"That would be good," I said, heat creeping up to my cheeks.

His smile grew from my blush, but he told me anyway, thankfully not commenting on my blush.

"Even though James is out of jail, it's not like he's going to bother us anymore, right?" he said.

I bit my lip again. Jeez, soon my lips would be broken apart from my teeth.

"See, this is why I didn't want to tell you," I mumbled.

He continued staring at me in confusion.

"I'm not really sure if this is going to be bad for us," I whispered. "Since I fell…I didn't get to hear anything else about this. That's why I wanted to wait."

He looked like he was thinking really hard, trying to understand it all.

"But why would he come back? What would he accomplish?" he asked mostly to himself.

I shrugged. "That's why I wanted to wait," I said again, play glaring at him.

He didn't smile like I wanted him to. His expression reminded me of those days before I was taken back home, those days when he was dead inside.

I leaned forward and grabbed his face on either side. "Edward," I whispered, forcing his eyes to meet mine. "Please don't stress over this. I'm sure it's nothing. We'll probably never even see him again." I tried to sound reassuring, like _I _was sure, but it came out more like I was trying to convince myself.

He didn't say anything - he just stared at me blankly.

Edward POV

He was back. That asshole actually came back. It was my worst nightmare. I never told Bella this, but I've always had nightmares. Before I met Bella, I had nightmares about that night my parents were murdered, and the night I was kidnapped. However, ever since I was put in jail, my nightmares were about _him. _I always feared that while I was in jail that psycho might escape. It worried me every night, keeping me awake.

But now, my nightmares had come to life. He _was _out. I knew James well enough to know he held a grudge. That grudge was definitely between him and me. I had ratted him out, and he had to pay for it. He wouldn't stop until I was as miserable as him, and he knew my weakness.

I gazed down at Bella's sleeping form. She was lying on her back, her arms wrapped around my waist. I had my arms around her, too. The thrumming of her heart against my chest was calming, and it usually warded off the nightmares. Bella's stitches were the blackest thing in the room. It was like they were blacker than black - if that was even fucking possible. I lightly traced my pointer finger on the stitches on her forehead, hissing out a low breath between my clenched teeth.

I was such an idiot. I kept saying over and over that I would always protect her. I said I'd never slip up again.

And I kept fucking slipping!

I clutched her tighter, as if that would keep all of my demons away. All of this was happening because of me. I should have just left. I should have never came back. I had the chance to leave Bella when I came out of jail, when she didn't remember me. She would've never known the difference of having me there or not. I would be in pain, but the fact that she wasn't would get me by.

And now look at her. Stitches covered her body - her legs, her arms, her face. Her skin was perfect, pure ivory. Now it was haggard and torn.

I knew now what I had to do.

At all costs, Bella came first. Her life before mine.

Bella and I were sitting at her dining room table. I clutched onto her hand for dear life as Chief Rogers took a deep breath, folding his hands.

"You guys know that he escaped, don't you?"

I didn't speak. If I did, bubbles of screams and profanities would pour out. Bella's parents were here - I didn't want to embarrass her.

"Yeah," Bella said quietly, "we know."

I instantly tightened my already iron tight grip on Bella's hand. Just the mention of him made me want to throw up.

I thought what I did for Bella would rid myself of James' poisons. I thought I would never have to face him again, never have to even deal with his stupidity. However, that asshole couldn't take a hint. He couldn't just stay in jail and leave us alone. That motherfucker was lucky the judge didn't decide to hang him - even though I don't think they're allowed to do that anymore…but whatever! He deserved to die.

"We're not sure why he even escaped," Chief Rogers went on. "We aren't sure if it's just to get out of jail or…for other things."

"What kind of other things?" Charlie asked.

I looked back at him to see him pushing himself up off the wall that he was leaning on, his arms folded firmly over his chest. He looked so serious, kind of scary, actually.

Chief Rogers cleared his throat nervously. All eyes were on him.

"Well…there is always the notion that he may have came back for…Bella," he said unsteadily.

Everyone was silent.

_Pfft, I wasn't going to be silent._

"Well, then let's fight the fuck back!" I yelled, smacking my fist against the table angrily.

Bella jumped in her seat. She rested her palm on my hand that was lying on my thigh.

"So what does this mean?" Charlie asked. "You aren't certain if he really is coming back for her, so-"

"He is," I interrupted in a cynical voice. "I've known him for six years. He's not going to give up. Not that easily."

Bella's hand tightened on mine.

"Just calm down," Chief Rogers said, probably from my "I'm about to kill a small family with a minivan" expression.

I took a deep breath, attempting to unclench my teeth. They were locked so hard together that it was almost as if they would stay that way.

"Now listen, there's no need for any panic," Chief Rogers continued. "Bella can just go on with whatever it was she was doing. I'm sure nothing b-"

"No," I interrupted in a hard voice.

Everyone's heads turned to look at me.

"Edward?" Bella whispered. "What's wrong?"

"No," I repeated.

"Would you like to elaborate?" Renee asked.

I shut my eyes and breathed in heavily through my nose. Once I breathed all the breath out again, I spoke.

"I'm not letting her go on with her daily life," I said.

"It's not up to you!" Renee screamed. "We're her parents-"

"Yeah, well I've been the one who actually took care of her - for once in her life!"

"We _do_ take care of her," Renee contradicted.

I snorted. "I'm the only reason she's alive right now." I looked down at her. "And I'm going to continue to be that reason."


	25. The Grass Maze

**D: Sorry for the long wait. I had a busy weekend and yesterday was my demon brothers birthday T.T yay... Anyways, I got it up now :D So, you know the drill. REVIEW!!! **

**And unfortunately, this story is soon coming to a close. It was a fun ride :/ But, no worries. I have a new story that I'm putting up right after this one! So check that out when this is all done! I hope you'll like it :)**

**Anyways, enjoy my awesome readers!**

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Chapter 25: The Grass Maze

Bella POV

Edward was acting so strange. He was acting so protective - more so than usual. It's not that it bothered me, I just felt bad for him.

It had been a week since we heard about James escaping. Ever since the time we talked in the dining room about it, Edward hasn't left my side once. He's with me at night, and he doesn't even sleep. He never goes back to his apartment with Emmett, he stopped going to work, and he's just always here, looking around the room. I don't know why he's acting like this. I mean, I'm afraid that James will come back, too, but I'm not going to go all ninja on anyone who tries to come by me.

The other day Angela knocked on my door, and Edward didn't know who it was, and he almost punched her in the face! He just yanked the bedroom door open and flung his fist out. Thankfully, I was there to push Angela out of the way.

I looked over at Edward.

He was sitting on my bed, his bloodshot eyes drooping.

I crawled over to him on the bed. I moved his muscled arms out of his lap and plopped down. I put my hands on either side of his face, examining his tired expression.

"Edward, get some sleep. Nothing is going to happen to me for eight hours."

He yawned, pushing his hair out of his eyes. His hair had grown so much.

"You don't know that," he mumbled.

I examined his hunched form. He looked so weak, barely able to sit up.

"You aren't going to be much of a help if you're a zombie," I told him.

He shrugged. "I swore that I'd always watch you."

"I'm not a kid, Edward. I can be left alone for a few hours."

By his expression I could tell I would be able to get him to sleep. All I needed to do was a little more persuading.

"Come on, Edward," I urged. I combed my fingers through his hair. "You said you would do anything for me, so just sleep. It will make me feel better if you do."

"Well…" He hesitated, his eyes staring at the rumpled blankets.

"Sleep," I said. I shoved him down. For once, he fell back onto the bed. He was too tired to even fight off my meager amount of muscle. "Sleep, Edward," I whispered. "I won't leave. I'll stay here until you wake up."

"You better," he grumbled, pulling me to his chest as he shut his bright eyes.

I shut my eyes, too. When I woke up it would be September - ten days until my birthday. More importantly, it would be ten days until Edward and I were only three years apart.

Edward woke up after over ten hours.

I woke up long before he did, and like a good girl, I lay there and waited…for three more hours. It was extremely boring. However, watching Edward as he slept eased the boredom. Sleep was the only time Edward didn't look like he had any stress. His face was rid of any expressions of anger, irritation, or worry. All he had as he slept was pure peace.

Now Edward and I were outside in my yard. Edward lay somewhere in the grass in my giant yard, the sun shining brightly - which was a rarity for Forks, even in the summer. The grass was so long now that if Edward stood in it, it went over his head. My parents said that they wanted it like that. They said it looked beautiful, the long grass blowing in the light breeze. I had to agree with them. It _was_ beautiful. It made me feel like I was in a fairytale, watching the clouds float in the pure blue sky, the sun shining down on the long, perfectly green grass.

I was sitting up on a branch in one of the huge trees in our yard. I sat up there, looking for Edward. I watched vigilantly for a sign of him - his strange reddish hair, the shine of his eyes - anything. However, I couldn't find a single spot of him.

Now I gave up.

"Okay, Edward!" I called from up in the tree. "I give up - I can't find you!"

Silence.

"You win, okay?" I yelled.

"I do?" someone whispered into my ear from behind me on the tree branch.

"Ah!" I screamed, almost falling out of the tree.

Edward's loud laughter shook the branch.

I reoriented myself on the tree, embarrassed. My cheeks were burning.

"That wasn't funny," I grumbled.

He continued laughing. "Yes it was," he countered. His arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me to his chest. "Sorry," he whispered in my ear, "you're just too easy to scare." I felt him smile against my neck.

I pushed his arms off me and hopped down from the tree, landing into the sea of grass.

"What are you doing?" Edward asked from up in the tree.

"You want to play?" I said, running already. "Then let's play."

I ran through the grass. Its smooth edges slid across my body as I pushed through it. The grass was so thin, but it was really hard to push through. I ran as fast as I could, determined to win this game.

"Wait!" Edward yelled from very far behind. "What am I supposed to do?"

"Find me!" I yelled back, turning to a different direction.

Everything was a blur of green. I felt like I was in a water color painting. Everything was waving slowly like the lava in a lava lamp. It was surreal, beautiful like my parents had said it would be.

I heard a twig snap from in front of me, then a voice that was definitely Edward said, "Aw, shit." I turned, then started running the other way.

"I hear you, you know," Edward said breathlessly, his footsteps not that far from me.

I hid behind a very thick patch of grass, peeking through.

He was standing right in front of me, so clueless.

I leaned next to his ear. "Then catch me." I started running, the grass making extremely loud noises as I pushed through the thick tufts.

As I was running I looked behind me, and there he was.

"Oh shoot!" I squeaked.

His long legs were way faster than mine, and he was only three strides away from catching me.

"I…" I heard him huff then I felt something smash into my back. "Got you!"

I landed on all the grass on my stomach, not at all painful. The layers of grass protected me from anything hard on the ground.

Edward flipped me over, laying on top of me.

"Ha," he laughed. "I win."

I grinned, happy to see him so lighthearted for once.

"Yes, you do," I murmured.

"And…" Edward began. He stood up and picked me up, slinging me over his shoulder. "I won the best prize."

I started laughing as he walked through the grass, making me bounce.

"Put me down!" I giggled. "You're going to drop me!"

He snorted. "Really, Bella? You're like five pounds."

I crossed my arms. "I _am not._"

"You're so tiny," he murmured.

I huffed.

I never liked that he thought of me as so young and small and breakable. He was standing at a very tall six feet, and me at only five feet four inches. However, I didn't care if he was older than me, or bigger than me. I loved him. If he was any other way, it wouldn't be the Edward I loved. I loved the Edward with the uncontrollable bronze hair, the emerald green eyes, the lean body covered in the scars that just made him, _him_, and the trucker mouth. That's just how he was, and how I liked it to be.

"Don't worry," he said, breaking me from my thoughts. "I think it's cute." He looked back at me and winked, making me laugh.

He finally put me down once we emerged from the grass.

I realized then that my white summer dress was now covered in dirt and grass stains.

Great. Now my mom was going to give me a long talk on how it is important to keep clean. She would say, "You are a lady, and ladies do not run in the grass and get filthy."

"Look at me," I said, putting my arms out to show my dirty dress.

Edward's eyes scanned me up and down. One side of his mouth quirked up. He pointed to my hair, grinning.

"Nice hair," he said.

My eyes widened.

I turned to the back door, looking at my reflection through the glass window. I gasped at what I saw.

My hair was a curly mess around my face. My usual waves were now giant curls, stuck together with grass. My face was flushed, and my eyes were bright. I looked alive.

He patted my hair, grinning.

I swatted his hand away.

"I look like a wild woman," I said, poking at my hair.

"You look beautiful," he murmured. "You always do."

I turned around and smiled up at him.

"Thank you," I said, a blush painting my cheeks.

He brought his hand up to my cheek, rubbing his thumb across it.

I brought my arms behind his neck, leaning in to touch his lips with mine.

Edward POV

"I'm not leaving," I said again stubbornly. I crossed my arms over my chest, glaring at her.

Bella groaned, throwing her arms up into the air.

"Edward, you have to leave my side sometime! He's not going to come, I know it. We can't just live in fear."

"I'm not afraid," I told her. "I'm just making sure nothing bad will ever happen to you again."

She stood in front of me, staring down at me.

"What about you?" she asked.

I shrugged. "If you're okay, then nothing else matters."

Bella huffed, exasperated.

"Well unlike you, I actually care about your wellbeing." She sat next to me on the grass in her front yard - the grass that was normal height. "Go out, Edward. I can't let me keep you tied down."

"You aren't keeping me tied down," I argued. "I want to be here."

Bella yanked angrily at the grass. She wasn't winning. She always wanted to win.

"Well, what if I said _I_ don't want you here?" she asked, raising her eyebrow.

That never crossed my mind. Bella would never kick me out…would she? No. I had to stay. She wanted me around, always.

"But you always want me around," I said aloud.

She raised her chin. "Not today. I want you to get out of here and go do something."

I was about to protest but she continued before I could speak.

"It's been two weeks, Edward. He's not going to come."

It had been awhile. Maybe he _wouldn't _come. There _were_ cops surrounding the house and other cops out searching for him.

"Well, I guess I could go for a-"

"Okay!" Bella interrupted. She yanked me up from the grass and pushed me out the big gate. "See you tonight, Edward!" She waved from behind the closed gates, smiling brightly. She skipped happily back into the house.

What the hell was I supposed to do now?


	26. Gunshot

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Please don't be all like: I'm so confused?! FTW? EVERYTHING, _EVERYTHING _will be explained in the next chapter.

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Chapter 26: Gunshot

Bella POV

I was utterly bored, but content. I didn't have Edward breathing down my neck, and he was out enjoying himself…I hoped.

I was lying in the one area of my giant yard where there was normal length grass. It was where the in ground pool was. I lay next to the pool, rhythmically skimming my fingers against the crystal blue water. The sun was shining down on me, it's heat not too much. I put my hand up, watching as the sun streamed out between the crevices of each of my fingers.

"Bella!" Angela's familiar voice called.

I looked up to see Angela running over to me, her hair in a sloppy bun on the top of her head.

"Hey, Ang," I greeted her.

She plopped down next to me.

I stared at her, waiting to see if she was going to say anything.

She didn't.

"Um, anything you needed to say?" I said awkwardly. Angela and I used to be able to talk all the time about almost anything. However, ever since I met Edward, things changed. I wasn't dependent on my friends anymore. I could be alone, unlike before, and be fine with it.

"I just wanted to hangout with you," Angela said. "We haven't talked in so long."

I suddenly felt bad for devoting all my time and attention to Edward. It's not that I didn't want to be around Angela, it was just that…well, frankly, being with Edward was way better. I loved hanging around him. He was basically my everything now.

"I'm sorry," I muttered, picking at slivers of green grass. "I've just been really busy."

Angela laughed. "Yeah, I kind of caught that."

I sighed. "Life is so complicated. I don't feel normal anymore." I frowned. I wasn't a normal teenage girl anymore. There was nothing normal about _any _of this. This whole situation was just….

"But are you happy?" she asked.

"Yes," I answered confidently. "I am happy - for the first time in a long time."

I was happy. I wanted it to stay this way for as long as possible.

That ended very quickly.

James POV

I wait for her. She is beautiful, she has always been - just like _her._ Her hair is light brown. Her eyes are a deep pool of chocolate. I wait for her so I can take her, and satisfy this burning need in the pit of my stomach. I am having this need for quite awhile now.

Edward gets in the way. He always stops my plans. But my plan will work now. My plan is good. I have thought it out well.

So I wait for her. I sit outside her house behind a thick area of bushes. I watch as the sun slowly slides down from the sky, like butter burning in a pan, it slowly slides and dissolves into the purple sky that is the sunset.

My need tightens my body. I coil, ready to spring. I always feel this way. The need to kill quickly shoots through my veins. My heart is pounding with adrenaline as I watch it finally become nightfall. I know she is outside because I saw her by the pool before. I also know that Edward isn't there. I saw him leave.

I see her still sitting by the pool, now sitting Indian style. She brushes her fingers through her waist length hair. She is alive - for now. I watch as she slowly stands from the pool and pushes through a big patch of grass.

Now I stand, too. The lights are off in her house. I must be quiet so no one hears. I pat my pocket and feel the rag and chloroform in it. I head to the big gate, guarding my girl inside. I am going to get her. I run across the street. I stand in the shadows, watching as a cop car makes another round on this block. The lights shine on my shoes, but it misses me.

I turn to the gate. There is bars that I will be able to use to climb on. I grab the cold metal in my hands and pull myself. I am over it easily and land next to the pool where the beautiful girl has just been sitting. I run into the grass field, following after her. I see a flash of her hair, then the sound of her footsteps stopping.

"Edward?" her beautiful voice calls. "Edward, is that you?"

I am silent. I slowly step around the grass tufts, looking for where she went. I hear her footsteps quicken at the sound of my own closely behind her.

"Edward, this isn't funny anymore," she says, alarmed. "I know we were playing before, but enough is enough."

I stand still, watching her from behind a thick patch of grass.

She stands in the center of an open area of grass. The green is surrounding her, making it look like she is in a flimsy cage. The grass is long, over my head. It conceals me, making me feel like the predator once again. My fist tightens. This feeling of dominancy is a good feeling.

She twirls around at the sound of grass moving. Her eyes are wide, like they usually are when I'm around her. Her cream colored skin is shining in the darkness, making her look like an open target.

"P-please," she stutters, "stop."

I am now standing in a visible spot, right behind her.

She turns again, towards me. Her hair flips in a full circle, finally revealing her beautiful face. Her pink lips are in an O. Her eyes are shining like a cat's. Her skin is gleaming. She is pure perfection.

"James," she whispers.

A grin slips into my lips. She remembers me.

"Hello again," I murmur. I instinctively touch my pocket where the chloroform is.

"Get away from me!" she screams in a whisper, backing away from me.

I am angry now. She is ruining our moment together.

"Come with me, Bella," I whisper, holding my hand out.

She makes a coughing sound, then spits on my hand.

I clench my fist, feeling the moisture. I shut my eyes, barring my teeth. When I open them, she is gone.

"Bella!" I growl. I run forward, pushing the grass furiously. I am the predator fully. It has taken over my body and is encaging me. The man is gone - what was left of it.

"Help!" I hear her shout. It isn't loud enough for anyone to hear. I am glad. Her frenzied footsteps are right in front of where I am running. I turn, letting my instinct to kill take me over. I stop in the spot where I know she will end up running into. I hold my arms out, and then her little body falls into me. She looks up at me, an expression of pure terror etched on her face. This angers me more. "Let go of me!" she screams. She struggles in my arms, trashing around. She bites at me, kicks and yells. None of that matters. We are too far away for anyone to hear. We are buried in an ocean of grass - our haven.

I reach into my dirty pocket while she squirms and cries for Edward in my arms. I pour some of the chloroform onto the rag, stuffing it to her mouth and nose.

"No!" she gasps, but it is too late. She has already breathed it in. Her struggles lessen. She falters in my arms, making a whimpering sound. She slouches, falling into my arms.

I tighten my grip on her and throw her over my shoulder. I run as I see the lights of her house flash on, then a flash light beaming through the grass.

"Bella! Bella where are you?!" a man shouts.

I throw her over the gate. Once I hop down I pick her back up and run the rest of the way to the place I always go to - our new place.

Edward POV

Well, this was fucking boring as hell. I was at a bar with Emmett and a few of his buddies. Emmett's friend owned the bar, so they let me steal a drink or two. However, I didn't drink a lot. I wanted to be sober when I went back home to Bella. She would probably be pissed at me if I came to her room drunk. Anyways, I didn't trust myself with Bella, alone in her room while she was wearing one of her skimpy summer pajamas, drunk.

"Edward!" someone screamed.

I turned in the barstool to see Bella's dad.

I furrowed my brow, confused. "Charlie? What are you doing here - how did you find me?" I asked.

He leaned against the wooden bar, breathing heavily like he just ran a marathon.

"What is it?" I urged, getting panicked.

He took a deep breath then look me straight in the eye. "It's Bella."

I ran through the grass, shouting her name. Where the hell was she?!

"Are you sure she's gone!" I yelled to Charlie running behind me holding another flashlight. "You checked everywhere?"

"Yes," he yelled to me, finally catching up. "I checked every inch of this place, and she's not here. I… I saw him leave with her, Edward. They aren't here."

I stood next to the pool, staring at my outline in the black water. It was almost midnight. The thought of Bella out there alone, with _him_, made me clench my fist. I turned to Charlie.

"I have to find her," I said in a hard voice. My teeth were clenched so tightly it was almost painful.

"On your own?" he asked in disbelief. "Edward, you can't go looking-"

"I'm going," I interrupted in a harsher voice than was necessary. "Don't try to stop me." I ran to the gate, hopping over it effortlessly. I ran down the street, knowing exactly where he would have taken her. It was the place he always brought me to, to hurt me.

"Where are you going to go?!" Charlie called.

"My old home!" I yelled back to him over my shoulder as I ran to the path where this all started - the path where just a few months ago Bella was walking before she was kidnapped.

Bella POV

My head was hurting so much. It felt like my brain turned into a smoothie and was now swishing around inside my skull.

"Ugh," I muttered.

My eyes opened then shut immediately when a bright light blinded my eyes. I felt someone's hands sliding down my arms. They weren't the same feeling and shape that I knew to be Edward's hands. They were rough and bigger. The hands reminded me of a savage.

All the things that had happened before flew into my mind.

Telling Edward to go out. Laying by the pool. Talking to Angela. Going into the grass. Seeing James again. Running so fast it hurt. Falling into his arms. A cloth being pressed to my mouth as I struggled…

My eyes snapped open, my breathing heavy. I looked down to see James laying next to me, running his rough hand down my arm.

He grinned. "You're awake now."

I prepared to run, but I couldn't move. I looked down to see that I was strapped to a metal table, like the ones doctors used when operating.

"W-where am I?" I whimpered.

James stood up, smacking his fist against his forehead. "Stop!" he screamed.

I jolted on the table from the sound of his scream. It reverberated against the walls, ringing through the…house? I was in a house it looked like.

He smashed his fist against the table, groaning. "You're ruining this moment again!" he screamed. He looked up at me, his expression faltering. It went from enraged to blank. "Jane?" he whispered.

Jane? Who the hell was Jane?

"Please, just let me go, James," I whispered. I struggled under the ropes then found a piece where it was tied. If I could just untie it…

"Jane!" He threw his arms around me, crying into my shoulder. "I missed you so much!"

I yanked at the rope, loosening it.

As he was hugging me I pulled my arms out enough so that I could get out. I slid my arms out then shoved him away from me.

He flew across the room, landing into a pile of wood that looked like it was burned.

"Jane!" he screamed, laying in the wood.

I fell off the table, the ropes tangling my arms and legs. I hastily threw them off, running as fast as I could to the door I saw across the hall.

"You aren't leaving again!" he said.

I looked behind me as I was running to see him pull a handgun out. A scream erupted from my mouth.

He smashed into my back, sending me flying to the ground.

"Please!" I screamed. "Just s-" I was cut off by him smashing the gun into my face. I felt blood pouring from my nose like a waterfall. I brought my hand up and brought it back to examine it. There was so much blood - it was dripping from my hand.

He blinked. "Bella?" He yanked me by the hair, pulling me up.

I felt hot tears spring from my eyes.

This was the end. I knew it. I would die happily. If Edward was alive, everything would be okay. I couldn't complain. At least out of all this mess, I met Edward. I knew that I'd die with him loving me.

He threw me against the wall.

My head smashed against the wood, making everything go fuzzy. I saw James slowly prowling towards me, the gun held up to fire.

"You're just like her," he whispered.

There were black spots, and I was becoming woozy from the amount of blood I was losing.

"And you'll end - just like her." He slowly held the gun up, pointing it at my face directly.

There was a crash. There was a familiar scream of my name. Then, there was the gunshot.

* * *

**I'm a bitch for ending it there, but cliffies are way more exciting then just giving you it all right away! Feel free to guess at things. REVIEWSSSSSSSSSS**

**Btw, I've been getting less and less reviews T.T It's making me go on angry edward rampages! :O**


	27. Secrets Revealed

Chapter 27: Secrets Revealed

I opened my eyes. I wasn't dead. That didn't make sense. I was shot, but I didn't feel anything besides the pain in my nose and head. My eyes focused on the figure in front of me. It was a familiar figure. A black shirt, messy bronze hair. The one difference was the blood covered hole through the left shoulder. The figure slowly turned to me, revealing himself.

It was Edward.

"Edward," I whispered, my eyes going wide.

He just stared at me, then his eyes went to his shoulder, staring at the blood as it dripped out.

Tears fell down my cheeks, mixing with the blood on my face.

He fell to the ground at my feet. He was weak. I wasn't used to seeing Edward like this.

"Edward!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. I fell to my knees where he was laying. His eyes were half shut, the emerald escaping through his thick lashes. "Edward, please," I blubbered. I grabbed his hand in mine, squeezing it tightly.

"I…"

I looked up at the sound of James' voice, anger taking me over.

"You bastard!" I yelled. "Everything is all your fault!"

He stared at me, his mouth hanging open. He looked down at the gun in his hands.

"I hope you go to hell," I whispered venomously.

There was another loud crash, the big door opening. There were cops standing there holding guns, pointing them at James.

"Put the weapon down!" an officer screamed from behind his mask.

James slowly let the gun drop from his hand. It landed at his feet with a quiet thump, like the sound of a faltering heart.

I looked down at Edward.

I was thankful he was still holding my hand, too. I clutched it desperately to my chest, right above my heart. It was like I was showing him that my own heart was beating, so his had to keep beating, too.

"Bella!" my dad's voice called.

I turned as him and ambulance workers ran over to us.

"Dad?" I murmured in disbelief.

He ran over to me, pulling me into his arms. He was hugging me, but I didn't hug back. I just watched as the two men put Edward on a stretcher carefully. Once they had him on, they ran over to the ambulance outside of the broken house we were standing in.

"Bella?" my dad said.

I looked up at him, more tears pooling in my eyes.

What if Edward died? What would I do?

"We have to get you to a hospital," he told me, pulling me over to another ambulance.

No. I wanted to be with Edward.

"No," I protested, pulling my hand back.

My dad turned to look at me, surprised.

"Bella, you have to go. I think you broke your nose, and you're losing a lot of blood."

"I mean, I'll go, but I'm going in Edward's ambulance." I pointed to the one he went in. I watched as the red and blue lights flickered across the shadows over and over again, lighting them with hope.

"Okay," my dad agreed. He let go of my hand and I ran like a wild dog that was just let off a leash to Edward's ambulance. I jumped in, my eyes widening at the sight of him.

They had removed his shirt, revealing his sculpted chest, all his scars, and the bloody wound that was dripping with blood on his left shoulder. He was strapped to the stretcher, machines and tubes tied all around him.

I think my heart broke a little.

"Hey," someone said.

I turned to see a man standing at the doors of the ambulance.

"Aren't you supposed to be in the other car?" he asked.

"I'm staying with him," I said in a hard voice. My expression made him shut up and let me stay. Good.

He hopped in the car, shutting the doors. "Go!" he yelled to the driver.

The car lurched forward, almost making me tumble to the ground.

I looked down at Edward, watching as the mask he was wearing sent oxygen into him.

_Please, _I pleaded to whatever God was out there. _You brought us together - don't take him away._

I remembered the day I was kidnapped, and how I was asking why anyone would do this to me, and what their plan was for bringing Edward and I together. I knew now it was for us to be together. What other reason could there be? I knew the world was cruel, but it wasn't so cruel as to bring us together for no reason other than to torture us.

"I love you, Edward," I whispered into his throat as I leaned against him. "Please…stay."

I was sitting in a stupid hospital bed when I should have been in the waiting room, waiting for the news about what happened to Edward. Was he alive, or was he gone?

My mom was sitting next to me, and it was so awkward. I hated being by my mom. She didn't even seem to care at all about Edward. The doctor said I broke my nose and my head was only bleeding so much from a cut - nothing too major. So he stitched my head, and put some white thing on my nose. My mom wouldn't let me leave the hospital bed, claiming _I _needed rest. _I _wasn't the one who was shot!

Edward was now in the emergency room with doctors doing whatever they could. So now I sat here, biting my nails until they bled. I hated waiting - it was such a stupid concept. It drove me crazy, almost mental with distress. My heart was thundering in my ears, and I couldn't sit still. My mom was getting annoyed with my insistent tapping, but I could care less.

I _had _to know.

My dad was in the waiting room, though, where I so desperately wanted - needed - to be. Since I couldn't go, I pretty much shoved him out of my room, forcing him to wait as long as it took for the news to come.

James was back in jail now, under high surveillance. I wanted them to kill him, but my dad said that it wasn't legal here. It was so unfair. All of the deaths and pain and suffering he has caused people, and he was just going to jail. At least he would be rotting there until he died.

I couldn't wait for that day.

The door opened, and my heart went into an unhealthy beating. I was surprised it wasn't bursting from my chest and landing on the white tiled floor. Unfortunately, it was only Chief Rogers. I slumped back into my chair.

"Hello, Bella, Mrs. Swan," he greeted us.

My mom nodded.

"Hi," I said, disappointed.

He cleared his throat, sitting in one of the plastic chairs like the one my mother was sitting in. He positioned it so he was sitting across from me, the bed I was sitting in like a long table between us.

"Bella, I have some news," he began.

"On Ed-"

"No," he interrupted, "but I'm sure those will come soon."

I bit my lip.

"And I'm sure he will be just fine, Bella. He's a fighter."

I smiled.

"Anyway," he said, "you told me something interesting before."

I stared at him.

"You said that James kept calling you Jane. You also said he seemed…confused - like he wasn't really sure what was happening."

I nodded. "Yeah." Just the thought of James made me want to scream at the top of my lungs and rip my hair out.

"Well, I looked into that," he said.

I was confused. "What do you mean?"

"I looked up James Cullen, and I also looked up Jane and Edward's family."

"Okay?" I said slowly.

"I also looked into what happened with Edward. He told you the story, right?"

"Yes," I answered.

"Well, I finally figured out why he did all that. We even asked him, and he said yes."

I was interested now. Edward had always wanted the answer to why James chose his family.

"Tell me," I urged.

"Well, about five years before Edward's mother, Elizabeth, married Edward's father, she was married to James."

My eyes nearly bugged out of my head.

"We traced her back. Her name used to be Elizabeth Cullen."

"So…is James Edward's-"

"Let me finish," he interrupted. "It will answer all your questions - even the ones about yourself."

I nodded.

"They were married, and they had a daughter." He paused, looking me in the eyes. "Her name was Jane Cullen. However, James became abusive, as you can tell. He ended up killing Jane, and Elizabeth ran away.

"He didn't see her for about five years. That is, until he saw her in this town with her new family - Edward and his father." He cleared his throat. "You know what happened next. He murdered them and took Edward. So the reason was pure jealousy."

"But why me?" I asked.

He pulled a small paper out of his pocket and held it out to me.

I leaned across the bed and took it, my eyes widening.

"That's Jane Cullen," he said. "Now do you know why he took you?"

I stared at the picture of the girl that was about my age. It was like looking in a mirror, except for a few differences. Our hair was the same, strange curl, except her hair was a honey color. Our eyes were the same shape, but hers were blue. We could pass for sisters.

I took a deep breath, handing the picture back to Chief Rogers.

"So he took me because I looked like his daughter?"

He nodded.

I stared down at my hands.

"I just thought you would like to know his motives."

I looked back up at him. "Thank you, Chief Rogers."

He stood from the chair, leaving the room.

I just sat there, stunned. I now knew why James did all that. It was disgusting and horrible. Poor Jane…

"Bella!" my dad's voice yelled from down the hall.

I jumped from the bed, running to my dad.

"Bella!" my mom yelled to me for leaving the room.

I stopped once I was in front of my dad.

"What?!" I asked. "What happened? Is he okay?"

My dad smiled. "He's alive. He's awake in his room-"

I ran as soon as he said that Edward was alive.

I would see Edward again in all his amazing glory. I'd see him smile, and see his eyes crinkle around the edges as he laughed. I would see the amazed look he always gave me when I did things that surprised him. I would see the happiness swell through him when I said I loved him.

I would see _him._

I pushed his door open, breathing heavily from running.

He looked up from the IV he was picking at on his arm, a giant grin filling his face.

I just stood there for a little. I didn't know if I should hug him, or smack him for jumping in front of the bullet.

He opened his arms wide. "Get the fuck over here," he said in a serious voice.

Tears sprang from my eyes, and a goofy smile was on my face as I threw myself at him, watching out for his shoulder. I yanked his face to mine, kissing him deeply.

He pulled me back, peppering my face with kisses. He rubbed his thumb gently on my bandaged nose. "Nice nose," he said.

I smiled, not caring if I looked like a total weirdo.

"I love you so much," I said sincerely, wrapping my arms around his neck.

"I love you, too," he whispered into my hair.

I pulled back, smacking his arm.

"Ouch!" he said, rubbing his arm. "What was that for?"

"Why the hell did you do that?"

"Do what?" he asked innocently.

I rolled my eyes. "Jump in front of a bullet."

"I'm fine," he said, waving me off. He looked at me intensely, all joking gone. "Do you actually think I _wouldn't _jump in front of a bullet for you?" he asked, his eyes burning.

I backed away from his face, unable to think clearly from such close proximity.

"I-I…don't know," I stuttered like an idiot.

He grinned, pulling me to his warm chest.

I leaned my ear on his heart, listening to it beat, loud and strong.

* * *

**If anyone is a little confused about the whole story, ask me in a review :) But I think I explained it pretty well, right? You guys got why? **

**So Bella looked identical to Jane, except different hair and eye color. And this is also the reason I made Bella 14, since Jane is supposed to be young in the books, and 'cause I wanted to have Edward and Bella's age difference be important in the story, like another representation of how hard it is for them to be together, but love conquers all and all that jazz ;)**

**So review, just 'cause I love them3**

**Only an epilogue left, but after I put that up tomorrow, I'm putting my new story up, "The School Guide". Please check it out tomorrow! :) it would mean a lot. Also, in that story, get ready for the word "fuck". It's used a lot, lol.**

**Anyways, I'm gonna shut up. Bye for now my lovely readers!**


	28. Epilogue: Birthday

Epilogue: Happy Birthday

Edward POV

_Three Weeks Later_

I tiptoed across Bella's bedroom floor, wincing every time the wooden floor creaked.

Today was Bella's birthday, and I wanted her to wake up to the cake I worked so hard to make for her. Well, it wasn't really a cake. It was actually a cupcake with a candle on it…but I still worked really hard to make it. The little cupcake was made from scratch.

I sat next to Bella on her bed, watching as she rubbed her eyes, finally waking up.

She popped her eyes open immediately.

Bella had been excited for this day. She was obsessed with our age difference. She got annoyed when people thought that I am way older than her. She always told them we're only three years apart, and now we were again. It's just that her birthday is so far away each year.

She sat up in the bed, grinning.

"You bought me a cupcake?" she laughed.

I snorted. "I _made _this." I lit the candle, holding it out to her. "Make a wish," I told her.

She grinned, leaning over to blow the candle out.

I watched as the grey cloud of smoke slowly swarmed up to the ceiling.

"Thank you," she said. She wrapped her little arms around me, kissing my neck.

"No problem," I said uneasily as her warm lips continued to kiss my neck.

She continued.

"So, um, what was your wish?" I asked, clearing my throat.

I always had to keep Bella from going too far with us. We might only be three years apart, but I was legally an adult, and she was still a kid. I told her we had to wait until she was at least seventeen, and it drove her crazy. I couldn't blame her. It wasn't like I was perfectly fine with the idea either.

"That we could go to the willow tree," she said. "Just you and me."

I grinned. "That can happen."

Bella and I were now at _our _willow tree. She was sitting with her back to the tree, my head in her lap.

I just continued to stare up at her the entire time. I watched as her hair had red streaks in it from the sunlight shining on it. Her eyes were sparkling as she looked around at the long leaves that surrounded us. She was beautiful.

"What are we going to do?" she asked me suddenly.

I furrowed my brow. "What do you mean by that?"

She sighed. "What are we going to do now? I have to go back to school in three days, and then you have to go back to work once your shoulder is better. So what do we do _right now_?"

I sat up, sitting next to her.

"We can do anything, Bella. There's nothing more to worry about, or decide. We're just going to…be."

Her eyebrows scrunched down, the crease returning.

"I'm not used to that I guess," she said. "It's been awhile since I could just be…normal."

"Do you want to be normal?" I asked her, grinning.

She nodded. "I do. Do you?"

I laughed. "I haven't felt normal in six years. Now would be a good fucking time to start."

She laughed, leaning her head on my shoulder.

"What about us?"

"What about us?" I asked.

"I mean…you know, what about us?"

I sighed. "It would be nice if I knew what you meant by that."

"I mean, what are we going to do - our future together."

I didn't want to tell Bella I had thought about this. I had thought about this a lot, actually. I always thought about marrying her. I wanted to marry her. I could just see her walking down the aisle, Charlie holding her arm. I imagined us getting married under the willow tree, where we first kissed. It would be embarrassing to tell her I had actually thought about all this.

"Well, what do you want to do?" I asked slowly.

She stood up, raising her chin.

"Do you really want to know?" she asked.

I nodded.

She took a deep breath, her cheeks a light pink.

"Okay, well, this is what I want. I want to go to school, and you go to school, too. I want us to both go to college together, and then we graduate and do whatever it is we want to do. Then, we get married and have a ton of babies. I want them to look just like you - especially your eyes. Then we raise them together, and they grow up, and we grow old together." She looked at me, her face completely red. "That's what I want." She took a deep breath.

I just stared at her.

She bit her lip, her face becoming so red I didn't know it was possible.

"If that's not what you want…then that's okay with me. It's just…_I_ want that. I _really _want that. And-"

I put my hand over her mouth, grinning.

"Just…shut up," I said again. I removed my hand.

She took a deep breath. "Right, sorry. I just ramble a lot. It's a really bad habit."

I continued grinning at her embarrassment.

She bit her lip, staring down at her dirt covered shoes.

"So, what do you think?" she asked finally.

I pursed my lips, staring up at the sky through the leaves.

"How many babies are we talking?"

She grinned, jumping up to hug me.

I lifted her up. She was so light.

She wrapped her arms and legs around me, stuffing her face in my neck.

"I can't wait, Edward," she said giddily. "Our life together is going to be so amazing."

I just kissed her.

Our life together was going to be amazing. It already was.

_~The End~_

* * *

**So that's it :)**

**Thank you all for standing with me and reading this through :) Reviews for the end? Anyways, my new story is up now, so please go give it a look. It's called, "The School Guide". I think you guys would really like it :)**

**Bye guys. Hope I'll see you in reviews for my new story :D**


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